Dominant / Submissive Trust system

[Ranzid]

Ive been on getdare for a little bit now and one of things ive seen that saddens me is the stories of subs being abused ( and not in the good way) to the extent that they do not want to be subs anymore , and in some cases causing much more psychological/physical damage.

From the other side problems can happen as well but not to such an extreme level, subs can mess their doms around so much that it stops becoming a sub/dom thing and starts being the sub simply enjoying annoying their dom or worrying caring doms. then there are unreliable subs and then the miss-matching of likes/dislikes .. for instance one dom is very strict and want to control alot , matched with a sub who enjoys to rebel and doesn't want anything serious.

anyway my point is that alot of new subs and doms have bad experiences due to finding the wrong people and ruin what might have been a very enjoyable part of their life.

So after talking to some people from getdare .. veterans and n00bs alike an idea was formed..

The Trust system.
This will be a 3 tier badge system which will provide people a safe knowledge that the dom/sub that they may take/accept is trustworthy proven and honest.
this should hopefully reduce if not eliminate the situations where subs are abused or doms messed around.
information about the subs / doms will not be public , information on the dom/sub will only be seen by the gold council who will not divulge anything said to them unless its needed to in a legal sense.
this means that subs and doms alike can put forward who they think should have a badge or who shouldn't depending on their track record , those who are consistently bad or abusive will have no badge and be known to the group as someone not to use.


makeup of the system:

Gold Council - Gold badge
A council of elite Doms and Subs make up the Gold standard of the trust system , their reputations are beyond repute and they will deal with any problems that other badge holders may have and choose who is awarded the badges.

Silver Badge Holders:
These are proven Doms and Subs , known to be good and trustworthy and engage in the community in a beneficial sense.

Bronze Badge holders:
Not as experienced or known as silver badge holders bronze badges will still be trusted but not the same extent , this will be the probation of most subs/doms.
Along with having the prestige of being a trusted Dom or sub the badge holders will be expected to look after newly joined members who are interested in the scene.

Hopefully with this system .. which will require a lot of work to keep going , people can be encouraged rather that discouraged and protected rather than exposed.

any ideas or comment are more than welcome as this is just an idea at the moment.

[xeldin]

really good idea xeldin likes

[melissy96]

Love this idea Would hopefully prevent a lot of future horror stories

[Star Shadows]

I think this is a good idea, as much as a lot of hard work would have to be put in to make it work... I just have a few questions?

• Would this badge system be only for people who are actively involved in the S/m lifestyle (ie with a sub/dom or actively searching for one), people who have expressed an interest in this lifestyle, or would it be there for everyone irrespective of this?
  
• ...and if it is for everyone then shouldn't their be an extra rank for the inactive or uninterested parties?
  
• Also how are people going to be judged as to their levels, It is incredibly hard to decide who is trust-able in a way that is clear cut and fair to those involved.
  
• will it be moderated, new members sign on and get involved on a daily basis- it would be a lot of hard work to moderate.

I am by no means dismissing the idea, I think it is a good idea I just think it needs a lot of thought to be able to work well. Many people may confuse the system, for example people like myself and honeyness are not ACTIVE members of the s/m community, we don't have partners and aren't looking however id like to think we were in the gold council level as we are trustable sources and would do a lot to help. So there is a level of confusion in these aspects.

[Anjelen]

So where does one apply for a badge? 'Cause i'd like to get me one of 'em golden ones.

People here and on fetlife will be able to attest my awesomeness!

[alpha]

That's a pretty good idea, however, I think the problem you're explaining is that a lot of subs and doms just rush into something without first getting to know each and what the other person likes/dislikes, etc. and that's where the trouble stems from. So I think having a little bar either on your profile on or added as a stat (like your post number and join date) on every post would be a good idea, but it wouldn't be an excuse to not do your own due-diligence.

[Id.]

I like the idea but I'm not sure how effective it will be for the huge numbers of totally new slaves/masters on getDare. It seems like so many of the ads are created by people who just joined the site. And even among those who have been on the site for a while, how many have had enough meaningful s/m relationships to earn positive feedback and badges?

Also, isn't there already an "elite s/m" group or something that's by invite only? Does that perhaps offer a similar effect to the system you are proposing?

[Ranzid]

Originally Posted by Star Shadows

• Would this badge system be only for people who are actively involved in the S/m lifestyle (ie with a sub/dom or actively searching for one), people who have expressed an interest in this lifestyle, or would it be there for everyone irrespective of this?
  
  
  those who dont have an interest probably wouldnt want a badge of dom-ness or sub-ness, the general idea is that the badge would be for people who into the lifestyle as they would be the ones that can have a proven track record.
  
  
• ...and if it is for everyone then shouldn't their be an extra rank for the inactive or uninterested parties?
  
  as I said in the other one the badge system itself is designed for those with an interest in dom/sub etc , and so those with no badge would obivously be un-interested , it shouldnt realy be thought of as a rank , hopefully most people would end up at silver being trusted members, gold would simply me for the council.
  
  
• Also how are people going to be judged as to their levels, It is incredibly hard to decide who is trust-able in a way that is clear cut and fair to those involved.
  
• will it be moderated, new members sign on and get involved on a daily basis- it would be a lot of hard work to moderate.

It will be hard work , but to my mind safety is worth hard work, yes it will be moderated , obtaining a badge or higher rank as it were will only be available through consensus in the council , knowing your track record .. how your delt with your sub/dom will be the main factor , so that if say your a dom and you were a git to most of your subs but most people didnt know .. you wouldn't get a higher rank as you would be found out, on the other side if you were a good dom your subs would back you up (in full confidentiality of course)

I am by no means dismissing the idea, I think it is a good idea I just think it needs a lot of thought to be able to work well. Many people may confuse the system, for example people like myself and honeyness are not ACTIVE members of the s/m community, we don't have partners and aren't looking however id like to think we were in the gold council level as we are trustable sources and would do a lot to help. So there is a level of confusion in these aspects.

^ this is why I posted , the idea ive had isnt set in stone .. I just wanted the concept out there for us all to discuss , it will be hard work thats for sure , but if we avoid even 1 person from being truly hurt I think its worth it.

[Ranzid]

Alpha
"That's a pretty good idea, however, I think the problem you're explaining is that a lot of subs and doms just rush into something without first getting to know each and what the other person likes/dislikes, etc. and that's where the trouble stems from. So I think having a little bar either on your profile on or added as a stat (like your post number and join date) on every post would be a good idea, but it wouldn't be an excuse to not do your own due-diligence."

nice idea , the extra info would aid newcomers , but along with rushing in comes rushing into the wrong people , and if your new and a little nervous as im sure we all have been it would be nice to know your dealing with someone who wont push you over the limits and is known to be a good dom/sub.



Id.
I like the idea but I'm not sure how effective it will be for the huge numbers of totally new slaves/masters on getDare. It seems like so many of the ads are created by people who just joined the site. And even among those who have been on the site for a while, how many have had enough meaningful s/m relationships to earn positive feedback and badges?

Also, isn't there already an "elite s/m" group or something that's by invite only? Does that perhaps offer a similar effect to the system you are proposing?


there are alot of people who are new yes , and im not saying that 90% of getdare will have badges , but the bronze would be there for those with less experience but the right attitude perhaps?

and if there is already and elite s/m group it would be nice to hear from some of them, and maybe it has the same effect but by being invite only it means only those who have survived their inital subs/doms can get it .. which doesn't even address the main problem im trying to get rid off.

[nellybell]

The elite s/m section was done away with when the sub forums of the s/m section were redone. It was a flop anyway and the only good part of it was a little thing on your profile that said "elite s/m member" or something like that, I can't really remeber. It basically was the same as the eleite meber section and nothing happens in it.

The idea is great, but setting it up, if it even does, would be hell. I'm more than happy to help out but have to think realistically. Even if we don't get some sort of badge system going it would still be grand if we had some sort of group of people willing to help out some of the new people, especially the newer subs.

A bit more on topic though, you're going to have to iron out the details a bot more on who would be fittign into which section of ... classification? You have to take into account, like star mentioned above, that some people that know a fair amount about stuff and have expirence with helping out subs that have fallen into a bad place, aren't currently practicing for one reason or another. If you'll include them or not for that reason.

[higgs boson]

it sounds very good, however it seems to me that the bronze badge holders get a raw deal. because they have to look after new members of the sub/dom community, and therefor will still have the hardships of being messed around and abused.

[jamness]

I think it's a great idea if you can get a lot of people's co-operation to make it work. I just fear a lot of people might not want to take part if they're lazy and don't want to look after the other members etc. Also there IS an Elite S/m group on the site designed for this kind of thing, how would it fit in with that?

[Ranzid]

Nellybell

"A bit more on topic though, you're going to have to iron out the details a bot more on who would be fittign into which section of ... classification? You have to take into account, like star mentioned above, that some people that know a fair amount about stuff and have expirence with helping out subs that have fallen into a bad place, aren't currently practicing for one reason or another. If you'll include them or not for that reason."

those who have experience and a proven track record for being good would get in , active or not , we need people to help.

higgs boson

"it sounds very good, however it seems to me that the bronze badge holders get a raw deal. because they have to look after new members of the sub/dom community, and therefor will still have the hardships of being messed around and abused."

the bronze badge is the tough one , but simply having the badge should show that people know you and know that you arnt dangerous nor one to mess people around. as for still having people mess you around etc .. well there is no way to eliminate all the risk especially if its a new sub/dom,

but this is why I posted the idea .. if someone has ideas to change this to make it better please do say .. this is a work in progress thing .. and hopefully once its as good as it will get we can take it to the elder of getdare for approval.

[nellybell]

So, something that comes to mind when i read about the bronze members, What would be an effective format for figuring out who would be considered safe or not? As this is online people can lie, it isn't a complex thing to do, people get rather good at it. If there somehow is a mistake made and a crap person got put into one of the category that would reflect super bad on the whole system and leaves the people in charge in the fault.

I feel like that is something that is going to be really hard to iron out if it could even be done.

[Ranzid]

sure it wont be easy , and yes people can lie .. but thats why we need a community around it , talking to each other , someone lieing wont last long in an open community without being nice to their sub/dom .. and thus being good anyway.

but any ideas you can offer to make the selection better would be great