Slaves and subs: Strong People

Fiendish · 06-21-2008, 09:03 AM

I'm here to dispel what seems to be a common misconception among alot of people new in the M/s and D/s lifestyle.

Alot of people think that subs and slaves are weak, which is why they submit.

I'm here to tell you that they are NOT weak, are the farthest thing from weak. They are able to submit because they are strong, they're comfortable with what they are, and they know it won't be an easy road, but they do it anyway. Why? They need to, it's what they are.

All slaves and subs have my respect, I know you're very strong people.

Now, if anyone wants to disagree, state your case

Collared_Slave · 06-21-2008, 09:11 AM

Im a weak slave.
Take that fiendish theory!

Fiendish · 06-21-2008, 09:12 AM

You're arguing just to be argumentative, aren't you?

Collared_Slave · 06-21-2008, 09:14 AM

Maybe

But i do agree with what you are saying.
Many people also head towards slaving as they see it as easier- dunno why.

Fiendish · 06-21-2008, 09:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Collared_Slave

Maybe

But i do agree with what you are saying.
Many people also head towards slaving as they see it as easier- dunno why.

Because they don't know, methinks, but they learn

Bandit|Queen · 06-21-2008, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fiendish

.

I'm here to tell you that they are NOT weak, are the farthest thing from weak. They are able to submit because they are strong, they're comfortable with what they are, and they know it won't be an easy road, but they do it anyway. Why? They need to, it's what they are.

I do totally agree that submiting doesn't mean you are a weak person, however alot of subs that I know are not "strong" in themselves. They have very low self asteem, self hate and often have terrible body image. Maybe it is because alot of the subs I know online are female and women tend to have these insecurities normally, but they seem to be more obvious and far deeper with the subs I know.

Could submitting be a way to get support and attention and care? I think that is part of it. I have to admit it is for me. With Dom/sub I just feel the bond is deeper than "vanilla" because the trust has to be so much more developed beacuase as a sub you can quite litterally be putting your life in the Doms hands. I think for a lot submission gives them the strength to be more confident and think more of themselves. I feel wanted, needed and cared for as a submissive. Something I don't feel I can exactly get from a nilla relationship. Its hard to explain

I also think for some submission is a kink not a "need" but whatever it is you are deffinatly not weak for submitting and yeah it takes guts to make yourself so vunerable to someone and give them the controll. Can be scarey sometimes but always worth it in my experiance

Merlin · 06-21-2008, 12:58 PM

I think the failure here is that there is not one sub or one slave... There are very strong subs and also very weak subs like there are strong doms and weak doms or strong and weak people in general... everybody is different as are the reasons for being a sub. For some it is "the kick" of doing something "different", for others just fun, the next is doing it to relax, others see it as a deeper passion and some others may have a mix of reasons.
After all where i have to agree is another thing... Being a sub is not easy, and Fiendish you are right in your idea that they are doing often more than they and others are aware of.

TrekBoy008 · 06-21-2008, 02:05 PM

While I think it may be a generalization to say that all subs are not weak, I do have to agree that most of us, at least the ones I've talked with, are fairly strong individuals. I know the reason that I submit is at least partially because of the attention and confidence-building, as tempered_sugar has already said. I know that few things please me more than praise/compliments from my Master. It's also really nice to be the center of attention while I'm camming for him, something that I'm not very used to. As to being weak, although I'm usually very passive, if something is important enough to me or makes me feel uncomfortable, I'm not afraid to stand up for it.

TheLittleStrawberry · 06-21-2008, 06:22 PM

That slaves aren't weak, is quite a generalization, I think

Some are strong, some are weak. I see myself as fairly weak. Metaphorically, I'm a little kitten that needs care and warmth from its owner. I'm fragile and calm, bbut sometimes extremely playful and vicious. I feel the need to have constant care and to be dominated. I feel very comfortable being and equal. I just wanna submit, and it is my purpose as I see it.
I don't see myself as a very strong person. i struggle like eveyone else. Some see me as strong because I have the ability to remain myself, and happy, even though there's been alot of quite bad things happening in my life. But I really can't stand up for myself. If it wasn't for people around me, I would have crumbled.
Even then, I see myself as weak for the sole reason that without being dominated... I am incomplete. Which means I need something. it's not just a want, but a need. Needs are much like addictions, but not necessarily bad. But you DO succumb to needs. which means, it's above you.

But all this is just the way I see it, and I'm not even sure I got my point across.

robertsubslave · 06-21-2008, 11:23 PM

The most immortant thing in a Master/slave relationship is trust (respect of limits and pushing them) that bond of trust is what makes the difference between a weak and strong slave (trust = strong, no trust = weak)

Bandit|Queen · 06-22-2008, 12:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by robertsubslave

(trust = strong, no trust = weak)

So wish it was that easy!

Personally submitting doesn't automatically make you weak as a person. Your personality is where the weakness lays, not in your submission. I also don't think needing help and support makes you a weak person, having someone to lean on comes in many forms can be a friend or your Dominant. As long as you still have the guts to stand up even against your Dom and say when something is wrong, you disagree, something isn't what you want or over your limits then you are not weak.

I have seen subs just agree to agree with their Doms and that to me shows weakness, not having the guts to say they disagree even over things unrelated to Dom/sub. If I stopped disagreeing I think my Master would get worried

Submission should be part of you and make you stronger not totally take you over and make you into a door mat.

robertsubslave · 06-22-2008, 01:50 AM

I'm not disagreeing with that. All i meant was that in a relationship with trust in gives you strengh, where as if you don't have trust it shows weaknesses. On a Master/slave relationship trust is respecting limits and knowing how far to take them not expecting the sub or slave to do as you want.

Bandit|Queen · 06-22-2008, 03:22 AM

I know that was my rubbish atempt to make a bit of a funny :s

Dare861 · 06-23-2008, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fiendish

I'm here to dispel what seems to be a common misconception among alot of people new in the M/s and D/s lifestyle.

Alot of people think that subs and slaves are weak, which is why they submit.

I'm here to tell you that they are NOT weak, are the farthest thing from weak. They are able to submit because they are strong, they're comfortable with what they are, and they know it won't be an easy road, but they do it anyway. Why? They need to, it's what they are.

All slaves and subs have my respect, I know you're very strong people.

Now, if anyone wants to disagree, state your case

Yes.

-Daredude

Sorrow Becomes Her · 06-23-2008, 07:34 PM

I think there is a difference in 1. a woman having low self-esteem, low self-worth since they have either had the last shreds of confidence beat out them (verbal abuse hurts just as bad as physically.. sometimes worse.. bruises, at least, will heal eventually) and 2. a woman who is naturally shy and not so dominantly outgoing, and 3. a woman who genuinely loves serving her Master, and having him being a "Dom" over her. Not all Doms are able to handle the responsiblity of having someone's submission.

I think some people have themselves confused. they think they are being a "Master" when really all they are is a pushy asshole on an inflate ego trip.

I suppose I'm one of those "strong" submissives. You WILL NOT run me over. I will NOT be the mat you kick the dirt onto. Neither will I be a punching bag (I DARE you to try that sh*t with me, f*cker). If you want my submission you will earn it. You will be able to show that you are capable of attending to my needs. If I lay myself at your feet, I trust that you will know to handle me... I will trust you, period.

I submit myself and serve Him on my own will, and it's because I WANT to please Him. I know what I want in a Master... an asshole, believe me, is not what I will be submitting to. lol (being a strict master is a different thing entirely though.. I'm so nicely complicated.)

06-21-2008, 09:03 AM	#1
Fiendish getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: The 9th Level of Hell Posts: 339 Blog Entries: 12	Slaves and subs: Strong People I'm here to dispel what seems to be a common misconception among alot of people new in the M/s and D/s lifestyle. Alot of people think that subs and slaves are weak, which is why they submit. I'm here to tell you that they are NOT weak, are the farthest thing from weak. They are able to submit because they are strong, they're comfortable with what they are, and they know it won't be an easy road, but they do it anyway. Why? They need to, it's what they are. All slaves and subs have my respect, I know you're very strong people. Now, if anyone wants to disagree, state your case __________________ I have no signature!

06-21-2008, 09:12 AM	#3
Fiendish getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: The 9th Level of Hell Posts: 339 Blog Entries: 12	You're arguing just to be argumentative, aren't you? __________________ I have no signature!

06-21-2008, 12:58 PM	#7
Merlin Misschievous's Authority Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Germany Posts: 1,552	I think the failure here is that there is not one sub or one slave... There are very strong subs and also very weak subs like there are strong doms and weak doms or strong and weak people in general... everybody is different as are the reasons for being a sub. For some it is "the kick" of doing something "different", for others just fun, the next is doing it to relax, others see it as a deeper passion and some others may have a mix of reasons. After all where i have to agree is another thing... Being a sub is not easy, and Fiendish you are right in your idea that they are doing often more than they and others are aware of. __________________ Looking for female sub or couple (updated Version) Merlin's Magic Tower of Decision

06-21-2008, 02:05 PM	#8
TrekBoy008 getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Greater Boston Area Posts: 310	While I think it may be a generalization to say that all subs are not weak, I do have to agree that most of us, at least the ones I've talked with, are fairly strong individuals. I know the reason that I submit is at least partially because of the attention and confidence-building, as tempered_sugar has already said. I know that few things please me more than praise/compliments from my Master. It's also really nice to be the center of attention while I'm camming for him, something that I'm not very used to. As to being weak, although I'm usually very passive, if something is important enough to me or makes me feel uncomfortable, I'm not afraid to stand up for it. __________________ "Words are, in my not so humble opinion, our most inexhaustible source of magic, capable of both inflicting injury and remedying it." ~ Albus Dumbledore (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows)

06-21-2008, 06:22 PM	#9
TheLittleStrawberry getDare Devil Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: somewhere Posts: 1,142 Blog Entries: 15	That slaves aren't weak, is quite a generalization, I think Some are strong, some are weak. I see myself as fairly weak. Metaphorically, I'm a little kitten that needs care and warmth from its owner. I'm fragile and calm, bbut sometimes extremely playful and vicious. I feel the need to have constant care and to be dominated. I feel very comfortable being and equal. I just wanna submit, and it is my purpose as I see it. I don't see myself as a very strong person. i struggle like eveyone else. Some see me as strong because I have the ability to remain myself, and happy, even though there's been alot of quite bad things happening in my life. But I really can't stand up for myself. If it wasn't for people around me, I would have crumbled. Even then, I see myself as weak for the sole reason that without being dominated... I am incomplete. Which means I need something. it's not just a want, but a need. Needs are much like addictions, but not necessarily bad. But you DO succumb to needs. which means, it's above you. But all this is just the way I see it, and I'm not even sure I got my point across. __________________ My dares are bigger than your dares! Im doing dares again If you wanna send one, you can PM me, but I'll probably hang around the dare threads as well. Limits: I wont ingest anything nasty, Nothing messy that will ruin my furniture or belongings, nothing public, nothing illegal. most humiliating dare: I was dared not to remove my panties at all for a few days. Not even for bathroom duties, and to cut a little hole for 'nr 2' as I couldnt remove them . It was strange.

06-21-2008, 09:11 AM	#2
Collared_Slave Distinguished Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 736 Blog Entries: 6	Im a weak slave. Take that fiendish theory!

06-21-2008, 09:14 AM	#4
Collared_Slave Distinguished Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Posts: 736 Blog Entries: 6	Maybe But i do agree with what you are saying. Many people also head towards slaving as they see it as easier- dunno why.

06-21-2008, 11:23 PM	#10
robertsubslave Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 35	The most immortant thing in a Master/slave relationship is trust (respect of limits and pushing them) that bond of trust is what makes the difference between a weak and strong slave (trust = strong, no trust = weak)

06-22-2008, 01:50 AM	#12
robertsubslave Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 35	I'm not disagreeing with that. All i meant was that in a relationship with trust in gives you strengh, where as if you don't have trust it shows weaknesses. On a Master/slave relationship trust is respecting limits and knowing how far to take them not expecting the sub or slave to do as you want.

06-22-2008, 03:22 AM	#13
Bandit\|Queen getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 414 Blog Entries: 2	I know that was my rubbish atempt to make a bit of a funny :s __________________ Have fun all! Love you my smooch!

06-23-2008, 07:34 PM	#15
Sorrow Becomes Her Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: in the clouds Posts: 40	I think there is a difference in 1. a woman having low self-esteem, low self-worth since they have either had the last shreds of confidence beat out them (verbal abuse hurts just as bad as physically.. sometimes worse.. bruises, at least, will heal eventually) and 2. a woman who is naturally shy and not so dominantly outgoing, and 3. a woman who genuinely loves serving her Master, and having him being a "Dom" over her. Not all Doms are able to handle the responsiblity of having someone's submission. I think some people have themselves confused. they think they are being a "Master" when really all they are is a pushy asshole on an inflate ego trip. I suppose I'm one of those "strong" submissives. You WILL NOT run me over. I will NOT be the mat you kick the dirt onto. Neither will I be a punching bag (I DARE you to try that sht with me, fcker). If you want my submission you will earn it. You will be able to show that you are capable of attending to my needs. If I lay myself at your feet, I trust that you will know to handle me... I will trust you, period. I submit myself and serve Him on my own will, and it's because I WANT to please Him. I know what I want in a Master... an asshole, believe me, is not what I will be submitting to. lol (being a strict master is a different thing entirely though.. I'm so nicely complicated.) __________________ In ancient times, I soon became His sweetly submissive, sometimes bratty slut Curious about Masters/slaves old enough to buy me a drink. So very uninterested in pee, scat, beastiality, incest, knives, electricity, clampy things on my nipples (I'm such a wimpy masochist) nor will I induldge your interests in sending nudes. I'm submissive, but not beneath you. You must prove you know how to handle me first. I'm also a switch, but currently not seeking a slave of my own. Last edited by Sorrow Becomes Her; 06-23-2008 at 07:37 PM.