The corrupted wish game.

[Runesmith]

Granted. The shoes suddenly disappear, leaving you barefoot in cold, slushy mud. When you hobble over to the nearest shoe store with muddy feet, they turn you away thinking you are a homeless person with a mental disorder, mumbling about genies making your shoes disappear. The only one that let's you in is the "Righteous Catholic Nuns' Used Shoes". But when you bend over to pick up a pair, the nun notices that you are pantyless heathen and throws you out for desecrating the Lord's shoe store.

I wish it was vacation time already.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but you'd spend your vacation held at the monastery of the Catholic Nuns after they heard my story, them making lectures at you 18 hours a day

I wish I was more selective when younger

[Runesmith]

Granted. You were so selective that you never experienced anything fun in life. In your mid 20s you decide that life is dull anyway, and join the convent as a nun.

I wish the young nuns would be horny after not having a man for so many years.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but they'd invite the young monks from nearby for an orgy and you could only hear their moans and screams while chained in the basement with cockroaches reaching for your nose

I wish I knew what to wear tomorrow night

[Runesmith]

Granted. You know exactly what you want to wear tomorrow night. You are so obsessed with wearing that tomorrow night. You run to the store to buy the dress, but to your horror, it's gone. You run from store to store, but can't find that exact one. So, tomorrow night you turn up naked.

I wish I was the only guy at the orgy at the convent.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but this means you'd be the only one chained and painfully tortured from start to the end of orgy

I wish I wasn't so sleepy now

[Runesmith]

Granted. Now you have insomnia... like in the Stephen King novel. Are you seeing the threads and the little men with scissors yet?

I wish the speed camera I ran yesterday was not recording.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but it was not recording because it was blown up along with you when an ISIS bomb exploded in your house

I wish I could see into the future for next 48 hours

[Runesmith]

Granted. But since future is but a multitude of possibilities spawned by every possible action/decision every microsecond, everytime you think about the future you are bombarded by visions of all possible futures, like a trillion movies playing simultaneously in your head. 48 hours later, you wake up in a straight-jacket in a padded cell. Yes, that's how all those movies ended.

I wish I could flick my fingers and make my beard disappear instead of shaving.

[nina@]

Granted.. but it has been extended to all the hair you have, so with the flick all body hair, facial hair as well as hair on your head disappears.

I wish there was really some nature loving alien tribe (like in the movie avatar) in one of the nearby galaxies

[Runesmith]

Granted. As they love nature so much, they are aghast at what humans are doing to Earth. So they decide that humans need to go. The warships are on the way.

I wish cars would get automatically upgraded to the latest version just like apps.

[nina@]

Granted. But the car companies all incurred huge losses and shut down and now you have to manage without cars

I wish I were on a beach right now

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but I'd be there too, rambling all the time and you'd probably wish you were deaf

I wish there was a giant rainbow in my room right now

[Runesmith]

Granted. It's so bright that your beautiful eyes are instantly blinded.

I wish I could have had time to plant tulips for next spring.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, you have plenty of time to plant tulips in prison yard because you are sent to jail for 99 years

I wish I could learn to speak fluent spanish before Christmas