Learning to become Master....

SCMaster · 09-22-2011, 07:44 PM

Hi all,

I am new to this and would like some advice from both Masters and Slaves, this is not something that I am just looking for as a hobby but something I wish to pursue the rest of my life as a true Master. Also if anybody has any ideas on where to find an experienced slave that would not mind being a little patient with a noob then that would be appreciated.

Note: Will be posting on the wanted/needed section here shortly.

Thanks to all who can help.

dragonhunter501 · 09-22-2011, 09:02 PM

I suggest reading some of the wonderful stickied threads in the lounge and ad sections. Such as this list.

nellybell · 09-22-2011, 09:07 PM

Also, ask about things you're confused about, people will answer your questions if they're there to answer.

yours_slave · 09-22-2011, 10:35 PM

First of all, I'm a switch.

Secondly, there are no exact set of rules for being a master.

Your personality will decide whether you are dominant or not. So talking generally, having a dominant personality is somewhat between strict, but also a very caring and intelligent person.

Fools or sex maniacs can never be masters.

In any kind of relationship, master/mistress have a great responsibility than slaves. Most thinks other way around but the truth is opposite. A true master must protect his/her slave and it's his/her responsibility if slave put in a danger situation.

Counterfeit_Fantasy · 09-24-2011, 11:07 PM

Practice makes perfect. From a self taught kind of learning curve it important to practice on yourself. It takes practice to actually learn how much force there is on the other end of the whip, bondage is complicated knot work, and the dynamic itself isn't something you can learn from the opinions given within a book. There's quite a few different aspects of being in the dominating position, and no one practices the same thing. There's also a misconception on what a Dominant is. You're not necessarily a dominant if you want to control something or desiring what you want, how you want it. Obviously you're looking for some general tips?

Punishment: The cost of a punishment should always be below the cost of testing your authority. When the punishment has a greater consequence, defying authority is the easier way out, and hence rebellion. If it gets to that point where punishment is ruled out and your authority is no longer an asset, fold down like the bitch you are.

'If it was a true fish, it would have stayed in the barrel" mentality. Holy handbags if I haven't heard this a million times. Never expect a sub to be at your every waking call, it's not their job. Anybody can play at being top dog when the position is handed. It's a substantially different thing to be actually capable of acquiring and maintaining the dominant position for one's self. A sub/slave's submission is only as good as the presence of the dominant hand. If you falter, it's your fault.

~madluv~ · 10-23-2011, 05:21 PM

Make sure you know how painful the tasks you might have your slave do. do them yourself and study up on the health reasons if you do some things for long times.
be safe!

x.Kate.x · 10-23-2011, 05:50 PM

I find it easier to connect with people if I can see pictures and just normaly chat with them about my problems. It creates a freindship between the domme and the sub. (In my case)

Dark_Delight · 10-24-2011, 06:28 PM

First of all if you are just starting out and want someone who wouldn't mind a noob master I'd suggest just getting a normal girlfriend who's curious and practice a bit with her until you end up wanting to go past what she is willing and she breaks up with you for asking.

Anyways as for tips for starters never bargain, as in if a sub won't do something don't give them another option (not even or you'll be punished) if she consistently refuses it and it isn't against her limits probably best to just leave or stop, if she comes crawling back then you can punish them, depending on what the task was maybe make them still do it.

Also always be decisive when giving orders never second guess yourself or show any hesitation and try to be creative although it isn't necessarily all the bad masters I see on this site annoy me (as I'm sure they annoy the subs).

One more thing try to learn as much about your subs/potential subs as you can but try to avoid an interrogation or questionnaire.

ShadowMan · 10-28-2011, 12:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dark_Delight

First of all if you are just starting out and want someone who wouldn't mind a noob master I'd suggest just getting a normal girlfriend who's curious and practice a bit with her until you end up wanting to go past what she is willing and she breaks up with you for asking..

Personally I think that's a dreadful idea... there is nothing worse than the blind leading the blind so to speak...

I find it strange that so many see to think that putting 2 inexperienced people together is a way of gaining knowledge and experience... if they did that with mechanics or fitter and turners in machine shops we'd end up with a bunch of very poorly skilled individuals..

In my experience nothing beats gaining experience from someone that already has it, either another Dominant willing to act the mentor roll or an experience submissive that is not afraid to let someone learn on them... after all the basics of safe words etc are that same regardless

vulcan · 11-01-2011, 08:14 AM

Personally I see no problem with having an inexperienced slave as long as your views and plans coincide. However the main issue is to make sure that you have a very clear idea of what constitutes a master and what your responsibilities are. Being a real master is not something you can just launch into without lots of chat and advice from others in the lifestyle.

A master has real responsibilities; he must cherish and care for his slave, he must teach her what he expects of her, he must discipline and reward her as needed and he must show an air of command if she is to be happy and fulfilled.

Take your time and make sure you can see your direction and have an honorable and caring approach and you won't go far wrong.

09-22-2011, 07:44 PM	#1
SCMaster Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Posts: 2	Learning to become Master.... Hi all, I am new to this and would like some advice from both Masters and Slaves, this is not something that I am just looking for as a hobby but something I wish to pursue the rest of my life as a true Master. Also if anybody has any ideas on where to find an experienced slave that would not mind being a little patient with a noob then that would be appreciated. Note: Will be posting on the wanted/needed section here shortly. Thanks to all who can help.

09-22-2011, 09:02 PM	#2
dragonhunter501 Member Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Southeast United States - Central Time Zone Posts: 70	I suggest reading some of the wonderful stickied threads in the lounge and ad sections. Such as this list. __________________ 21/M/US - Master I do not do dares. I do not sub. Likes - pain (slight to moderate), cbt, some bondage, wax play, anal play, low risk public, spanking, edging, masturbation, cum control, cum play, exercises Limits- Poo/pee, Illegal, Unsafe, etc. Slave Application.

09-22-2011, 09:07 PM	#3
nellybell Truth or Dare Enthusiast Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: In front of the computer, staring vacantly. Posts: 2,812 Blog Entries: 14	Also, ask about things you're confused about, people will answer your questions if they're there to answer. __________________ There was a nelly, a very smelly enchanted nelly sweet as vegemite could be ahaha just kidding, but still loved just the same <3

09-24-2011, 11:07 PM	#5
Counterfeit_Fantasy Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: Narnia Posts: 188 Blog Entries: 9	Practice makes perfect. From a self taught kind of learning curve it important to practice on yourself. It takes practice to actually learn how much force there is on the other end of the whip, bondage is complicated knot work, and the dynamic itself isn't something you can learn from the opinions given within a book. There's quite a few different aspects of being in the dominating position, and no one practices the same thing. There's also a misconception on what a Dominant is. You're not necessarily a dominant if you want to control something or desiring what you want, how you want it. Obviously you're looking for some general tips? Punishment: The cost of a punishment should always be below the cost of testing your authority. When the punishment has a greater consequence, defying authority is the easier way out, and hence rebellion. If it gets to that point where punishment is ruled out and your authority is no longer an asset, fold down like the bitch you are. 'If it was a true fish, it would have stayed in the barrel" mentality. Holy handbags if I haven't heard this a million times. Never expect a sub to be at your every waking call, it's not their job. Anybody can play at being top dog when the position is handed. It's a substantially different thing to be actually capable of acquiring and maintaining the dominant position for one's self. A sub/slave's submission is only as good as the presence of the dominant hand. If you falter, it's your fault. __________________ Passive Aggressive, Sarcastic, and Squishy, oh so Squishy Message - Comment - FetLife

10-23-2011, 05:21 PM	#6
~madluv~ Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Posts: 5	makes sure you know what your dishing out Make sure you know how painful the tasks you might have your slave do. do them yourself and study up on the health reasons if you do some things for long times. be safe!

09-22-2011, 10:35 PM	#4
yours_slave Distinguished Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: In your dreams Posts: 934	First of all, I'm a switch. Secondly, there are no exact set of rules for being a master. Your personality will decide whether you are dominant or not. So talking generally, having a dominant personality is somewhat between strict, but also a very caring and intelligent person. Fools or sex maniacs can never be masters. In any kind of relationship, master/mistress have a great responsibility than slaves. Most thinks other way around but the truth is opposite. A true master must protect his/her slave and it's his/her responsibility if slave put in a danger situation.

10-23-2011, 05:50 PM	#7
x.Kate.x Account Banned Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: la~la land Posts: 161 Blog Entries: 3	I find it easier to connect with people if I can see pictures and just normaly chat with them about my problems. It creates a freindship between the domme and the sub. (In my case) __________________ 19/female/lesbian Likes: Guns, gloves, animals, girls, books, NOT my parents, Truths. I have a kitty named Cloud. He's all white I find it rare now that I accept dares, but if I am in the mood I will post with likes and limits. Otherwise they are none of your business Owned by Fromo

10-24-2011, 06:28 PM	#8
Dark_Delight Account Banned Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Canada Posts: 190	First of all if you are just starting out and want someone who wouldn't mind a noob master I'd suggest just getting a normal girlfriend who's curious and practice a bit with her until you end up wanting to go past what she is willing and she breaks up with you for asking. Anyways as for tips for starters never bargain, as in if a sub won't do something don't give them another option (not even or you'll be punished) if she consistently refuses it and it isn't against her limits probably best to just leave or stop, if she comes crawling back then you can punish them, depending on what the task was maybe make them still do it. Also always be decisive when giving orders never second guess yourself or show any hesitation and try to be creative although it isn't necessarily all the bad masters I see on this site annoy me (as I'm sure they annoy the subs). One more thing try to learn as much about your subs/potential subs as you can but try to avoid an interrogation or questionnaire. __________________ I'm the demon

11-01-2011, 08:14 AM	#10
vulcan Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: U.K. Posts: 113	Personally I see no problem with having an inexperienced slave as long as your views and plans coincide. However the main issue is to make sure that you have a very clear idea of what constitutes a master and what your responsibilities are. Being a real master is not something you can just launch into without lots of chat and advice from others in the lifestyle. A master has real responsibilities; he must cherish and care for his slave, he must teach her what he expects of her, he must discipline and reward her as needed and he must show an air of command if she is to be happy and fulfilled. Take your time and make sure you can see your direction and have an honorable and caring approach and you won't go far wrong.