Touched by Gender you aren't attracted to

[MissMaria]

Originally Posted by Ch4rl13

"How do you feel about being touched/played with by a gender you don't find attractive?"

Really good question. It generally makes me uncomfortable but I'm not sure if this is normal or a bit homophobic of me. It would certainly be a lot easier to find people to play with if I could be comfortable with guys too but wouldn't this make me gay or bi? I do feel particularly aroused by the female body (and not particularly by men) though bdsm is so exciting I don't know how much gender matters. I think you've probably raised more questions than I have answers for but I'll be interested to hear others thoughts and any advice you'd give me. To end with a question, does it make you gay or bi to play with the same gender?

I do agree that this poses a interesting dilemma even for me because despite being pansexual there are deffinatly a lot of people I am not attracted to, In general I have an issue with being touched unexpectedly or by people I don't trust due to mental health reasons and so this can become very complicated if a random person comes up to me and touches me (which has happened and the resulting panic attack was not at all nice) though being touched sexualy by someone it was pre arranged with who I am not attracted to, if I had to guess I would say it would proberbly be more arousing because of the fact I am not into it and so there is a humiliation/degradeation aspect thrown in there to some extent but even then as this has not happened to me in a lot of years like over 10 I have no true idea how I would react these days.

As for the second part of your question, the part about sexuality, I have heard this one before a lot of times and the truth is it comes from a place of fear... in that touching the same sex instantly makes you bi or gay, the truth is sexuality is widely considered to be self defined or in other words you are the sexuality you say you are, but if we break it down further the definition of sexuality is: the orientation of a persons sexual attractions and feelings, therefore if I man was to give another man a bj but had no sense of attraction to that or any other man prior to during or after the fact the man would still be hetrosexual or attracted to the opposite sex, which again is why it is self defined because a lot of people experiment to see if it is for them and find actually no this isn't for me, and thus it can not be defined by your past relations only by your feelings of attraction which only you could possibly know.

Good question though solid 10/10 for your way of expanding the original question to new hights.