Non-Painful Alternatives

Mythologist · 09-12-2009, 05:46 PM

Sorry if this is in the wrong place. My slave was kind enough to purchase quite a bit of special equipment for our sessions, including a single-tail whip, a flogger, a riding crop, and a cane. Problem is, she is really reluctant to use them. Any advice? Should I try to break her of her fear of pain, or just use the whip etc. only when she's messed up big time?

LilAngel · 09-12-2009, 10:13 PM

First of all, this would depend on whether the relationship is online or offline. If it was offline, then rather than using those items as a way to bring pain, I suggest that you should first introduce it as an implement used for pleasure.

For example, a session can be just you giving a light stroke with say a riding crop every 3-5 minutes, with no other touch, and her obviously in some form of bondage.

However, if this was online, then you might want to encourage her to use it instead, by giving her 'as much time is needed', and a reward will be given each time she uses one of them.

The most important thing is that she realizes that almost any toy/ implement in d/s can be used and portrayed very differently.

Her fear of pain shouldn't have anything to do with whips, crops etc. So you should also have a session where she is experiencing pain by either using households items (such as balancing a certain number of books with her hands out to the side for a certain period of time) or you physically doing something to her with your hands, etc.

Hope this helps.

Oh and I think this is more suited for the S/M Lounge.

Moved.

Mythologist · 09-13-2009, 01:17 PM

Thanks for the relocation and the advice. ^^ That gives me some good ideas on how to help cure her of her fear. It's an online relationship, by the way.

Dark_Baron · 09-22-2009, 02:34 PM

She is afraid of pain, not the instruments. The problem is paid and whips are connected in her perspective. Break this fault connection by using "painful" instruments for giving pleasure and not pain. Check this:

http://www.getdare.com/bbs/showpost....79&postcount=6

Also, let her realize that pain does not always hurt if it is in really small amounts and well controlled.

09-12-2009, 05:46 PM	#1
Mythologist getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 496	Non-Painful Alternatives Sorry if this is in the wrong place. My slave was kind enough to purchase quite a bit of special equipment for our sessions, including a single-tail whip, a flogger, a riding crop, and a cane. Problem is, she is really reluctant to use them. Any advice? Should I try to break her of her fear of pain, or just use the whip etc. only when she's messed up big time? __________________ Likes: bondage, pain, pet play, anal, humiliation/degradation, and much, much more! Limits: Poo, public, illegal, cross-dressing Think I'm awesome and want to play with me? Check out my ad! http://www.getdare.com/bbs/showthread.php?t=176741

09-12-2009, 10:13 PM	#2
LilAngel getDare Addict Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Australia Posts: 2,171 Blog Entries: 44	First of all, this would depend on whether the relationship is online or offline. If it was offline, then rather than using those items as a way to bring pain, I suggest that you should first introduce it as an implement used for pleasure. For example, a session can be just you giving a light stroke with say a riding crop every 3-5 minutes, with no other touch, and her obviously in some form of bondage. However, if this was online, then you might want to encourage her to use it instead, by giving her 'as much time is needed', and a reward will be given each time she uses one of them. The most important thing is that she realizes that almost any toy/ implement in d/s can be used and portrayed very differently. Her fear of pain shouldn't have anything to do with whips, crops etc. So you should also have a session where she is experiencing pain by either using households items (such as balancing a certain number of books with her hands out to the side for a certain period of time) or you physically doing something to her with your hands, etc. Hope this helps. Oh and I think this is more suited for the S/M Lounge. Moved. __________________ With love, from your favourite administrator. ♥ 8==========)~~~~~~~~ WORSHIPS KANGAROOS

09-13-2009, 01:17 PM	#3
Mythologist getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 496	Thanks for the relocation and the advice. ^^ That gives me some good ideas on how to help cure her of her fear. It's an online relationship, by the way. __________________ Likes: bondage, pain, pet play, anal, humiliation/degradation, and much, much more! Limits: Poo, public, illegal, cross-dressing Think I'm awesome and want to play with me? Check out my ad! http://www.getdare.com/bbs/showthread.php?t=176741

09-22-2009, 02:34 PM	#4
Dark_Baron Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Europe Posts: 66	She is afraid of pain, not the instruments. The problem is paid and whips are connected in her perspective. Break this fault connection by using "painful" instruments for giving pleasure and not pain. Check this: http://www.getdare.com/bbs/showpost....79&postcount=6 Also, let her realize that pain does not always hurt if it is in really small amounts and well controlled.