Truth! (for straight sub/switch men)

[PinkPassion]

Reason for why I am asking in spoiler, not necessary to read.

Spoiler:

I'm a straight girl who has only ever been the submissive in D/s relationships in the past. I met a guy who is more of a switch and normally I would stay away from that, but him and I have such amazing, mindblowing chemistry that cannot be ignored, so for him, I'm willing to try to find my inner Domme - I think it's possible because I love to tie up and tease my partner and even though I didn't think I would feel this way, I am kinda genuinely excited to explore it with him. Thinking about it made me curious about your experiences.

Are you submissive or switch?
When and how did you find out that you have a sub side?
What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you?
What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)?
What do you get out of being dominated?
Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name?
If so, what do you like to be called?
Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past?

[herpderp42]

I am not normally a fan of answering truths but I did read the spoiler and maybe the answers help you.

Originally Posted by PinkPassion

Are you submissive or switch? Switch

When and how did you find out that you have a sub side? A bunch of years ago and I am not exactly sure how. Kinda stumbled upon kink realted websites and got curious and into it. Not sure why/ how I found those sites to begin with.

What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you? Hm not exactly sure. Most of my submissive experience were of online nature but I think tasting my cum for her.

What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)? Hands behind back tied and fucked with a strapon while she teases/ strokes with my penis and balls as much as she likes.

What do you get out of being dominated? Probably the same as you would. It is a nice feeling to lose the control to somebody you trust. And well it is kinda hot to do dirty stuff with each other and pleasuring the partner (my motives for my dom and sub side are basically the same).

Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name? Depends on the name. I wouldn´t mind a playful humiliating name.

If so, what do you like to be called? Her dirty slut. Something like that for example.

Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past? Nope. While experience can obviously be sexy I like the idea of exploring with somebody new those kinks. As long as she enjoys it. The idea of her trying it for me makes it even sexier.

Best of luck to you!

[PinkPassion]

Originally Posted by herpderp42

I am not normally a fan of answering truths but I did read the spoiler and maybe the answers help you.

Best of luck to you!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read the spoiler and answer my questions. It does help me to understand better and gives me a bit of inspiration, even though I'm well aware that the only way I will know what my guy likes is by asking him or by studying/looking for patterns in how he responds to my words and touch. But as someone who is completely new to it, I can use all the inspiration I can get.

Luckily for me, I have much, much more BDSM experience than him even though he is 14 years older than me, so my performance will not be compared to an experienced Domme. I will probably always be submissive at heart, but I already feel like there is a desire to be in control that is natural. Even in all the years I have been submissive, I have always enjoyed edging men over and over before allowing them to cum. Long blowjobs where I'm in control is one of my favorite things - even though I love a hard, merciless throatfucking too.

I hope your fantasy will become reality!

[Jaro]

Are you submissive or switch?
I am submissive and owned by Princess Butterfly and Goddess Icey. I am interested in trying out being a Dom too some time, but I really mostly am very submissive.
When and how did you find out that you have a sub side?
When I joined getDare over two years ago. I joined because it was just a truth or dare site. Then I learned about all the other stuff and met Miss Butterfly
What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you?
I'm not sure, there has been so many, although all of it only online.
What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)?
There are so many. One is being tied up head to toe naked on the floor and then a large group of women trampling me with their bare feet, standing on my face, shoving their toes into my mouth, forcing me to lick and suck them. Combine this with keeping me close to the edge and some naked facesitting and forcing me to lick their ass and pussies and I would be in heaven.
What do you get out of being dominated?
The feeling of being proud of doing things for my Domme that make her happy, even if they are things I don't enjoy. The sense of accomplishment for pushing myself out of my comfort zone. But I love getting a fun task too sometimes of course.
Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name?
Oh yes! The more humiliating and degrading the better. By default I am her worm, but I have no limits at all on what she can call me. Name calling turns me on a lot!
If so, what do you like to be called?
Piss mop, deepthroat whore, filthy slut, horny little worm, stinky toe sucker, asslicker.... these are just a few from the top of my head.
Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past?
No, as long as she is a good Domme and is in the Domme mindset when she does so.

[AngelofDarkness]

I read your reasons for writing the truth, and I commend you for trying something new! I am 100% sub, but I have tried being a dom (didn't work out very well), but I didn't know until I tried!

Are you submissive or switch? Submissive
When and how did you find out that you have a sub side? A few years ago I joined getdare, and found my first dom. I knew I loved being ordered and being submissive to others.
What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you? Not too long ago, a dom made me hold me pee and poop until I was bursting to use the bathroom. She then made me strip naked, put my collar on, and go outside in the front yard, in the pouring rain, in the middle of the day, and pee. I was then to turn around, shove my face in the piss/mud, and shit. I was then supposed to crawl around some, then go inside. Well, it went a bit...wrong. Everything was fine up until after I peed, but then I heard a car coming down the driveway, and I was too far in the yard to go inside without being seen. It was the UPS (delivery) man coming to deliver a package. I quickly crawled behind a tree (cliche I know) and hid and waited for him to leave. I don't think he saw me, but I don't know (I had my eyes shut...). Then when he left, I came out of hiding, pooped, and went inside, shaking from the cold rain and from the fear of being caught. It was extremely scary, but also so hot and turned me on so much.
What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)? Being a full time pet and toilet slave to a beautiful woman.
What do you get out of being dominated? I feel I am put in my place, and I get to escape from my reality of being the one in charge (I am a manager where I work)
Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name? Yes
If so, what do you like to be called? Pet names, degrading names such as dog, slut, little whore, etc.
Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past? Not at all, it would be a learning experience for both of us!

If you are interested in experimenting on me, feel free to. I kneel ready to serve.

[SydSwallows]

Are you submissive or switch? SUB
When and how did you find out that you have a sub side? STARTED WITH A PANTY FETISH
What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you? MADE ME BLOW RANDOM PEOPLE OF HER CHOOSING
What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)? BEING MOUTH BANGED
What do you get out of being dominated? I GET OFF
Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name? YES... SLUT CUMDUMP, WHORE
If so, what do you like to be called?
Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past? NO

[BarefootAlien]

Originally Posted by PinkPassion

I'm a straight girl who has only ever been the submissive in D/s relationships in the past. I met a guy who is more of a switch and normally I would stay away from that, but him and I have such amazing, mindblowing chemistry that cannot be ignored, so for him, I'm willing to try to find my inner Domme - I think it's possible because I love to tie up and tease my partner and even though I didn't think I would feel this way, I am kinda genuinely excited to explore it with him. Thinking about it made me curious about your experiences.

I'm not straight, but I am a switch, I have been a sub most of my life, even tried being a full-time slave under an experienced master for a while, and have grown more dominant as I've gotten older. So... I think I can help you, even though you didn't ask exactly this question, or exactly of me.

A good dominant, in my opinion, seeks to craft an experience for the submissive, not to just get their giggle on making the sub do crazy stuff.

This is a well-known inversion in the community that puts most of the real power in the hands of the sub; the dom is only in control if, when, and while the submissive is comfortable, trusting, and consenting. If any of those conditions falter, the scene stops immediately.

What this means is that there's a neat little bit of mental acrobatics I and many other switches use in order to not only be a good dom, but to enjoy it.

In most forms of D/s relationship, whether RP/fantasy or in real life, there are actually four people involved, or... at least, four personas. There's the dominant's true self, the dominant's "Dom/Domme" persona; then there's the submissive's true self, and the sub's "Sub/Slave" persona.

The trick is to use that subtle division between true inner self and the facade/mask we wear to flip the roles upside-down for one set, to enable the desired role for the other.


In other words... when I Dom for someone, my true inner self is actually submitting to the submissive's true self in order to allow my dominant persona to dominate the submissive's submissive persona.

Make sense?

Inside, you're submitting to your partner by dominating him in a way you believe he'll enjoy and be turned on by.

I now return you to your regularly scheduled truth responses.

[BarefootAlien]

Also, I figured I'd give you some more general advice on a couple of the questions...

Specifically, pet names. These are different for every guy, just as I'm sure yours isn't the same as other women's. The one that's pretty consistent, though, is 'boy'. Especially praising, 'good boy!' or scolding 'bad boy...'. I've never met a single male submissive who didn't love that and feel their hearts flutter every single time.

That said... as the relationship develops, ask him what he likes to be called while he's subbing. And if you really want him to feel special, take the time to think up a new, original, uniquely fitting pet name for him. He'll be thrilled, trust me. Guys are sentimental too, we just don't wear it on our sleeves as much.


As for being dominated by someone who's normally a submissive? I've never met a sub who would be bothered by that in the slightest. At the very worst, it might disappoint someone looking for really extreme domination, but that isn't honestly what most subs want anyway.

Rather, a former (or current sub/switch) choosing to try to dom for me has several huge advantages already going for them.

First, they have experience being the sub. This is critical! Actually, the training master who owned me for a couple of months in my twenties talked a lot about that, and it may surprise you to know that when a dom is trained by another training master, it isn't by dominating a submissive in front of them... it's by going through slave training himself/herself. Let that sink in a minute...

The serious, hardcore end of the BDSM community asserts that the single non-negotiable key to learning to be a good, recognized, respected master is to learn to submit so you know what you're doing. You already have that!

Second, you're willing! That's huge! He will appreciate that, I promise!

And finally, you'll have an easier time than most delineating a clear difference between play time and normal time. You'll be able to take off your 'domme hat' and put your 'normal person' hat on all the more easily because it's a conscious effort for you to domme.


There are, of course, disadvantages... but I'm sure those are already weighing heavily on your mind, so I won't belabor them.

Seriously, give it a shot! He'll appreciate it! Worst case, you're not intense enough for him or comfortable going as far as he wants... or you find that it ends up exhausting you and burning you out, and at least you know, and can either tone it back to a smaller part of your lives, or move on and find someone more right for you.

[tarheel52]

Are you submissive or switch?
Submissive

When and how did you find out that you have a sub side?
Around 22 years old. I dated a girl who was switch but more Dom. I also started interacting with Doms online via cam. I realized that giving others pleasure was better for me than getting pleasure myself. My pleasure came from others getting pleasure from me.

What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you?
My Dom girlfriend would often make me cum three times before we’d be done playing. The longest session was 4 hours. I came 4 times, but a lot of that time was spent pleasing her orally, with vibrators and fucking.

What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)?
A fantasy is to be forced naked and serve a group of Doms for an extended time.

What do you get out of being dominated?
I get satisfaction from giving others pleasure.

Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name?
It depends on the relationship.

If so, what do you like to be called?
boy and sub come to mind

Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past? [/FONT]
Not at all. I enjoy being dominated by anyone who gets enjoyment out if it.

[alex_af1996]

Are you submissive or switch?
Switch
When and how did you find out that you have a sub side?
When I stumbled across Kik then getdare and fetlife and found I like obeying females
What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you?
Hard to say but playing in a public toilet while showing of to her and nearly getting busted or getting forced to show off for a full kik group and them degrade me
What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)?
Honestly I want my mistress to get a male to put a hot load of cum in my ass. Just a once off experience if I don’t like it
What do you get out of being dominated?
Self satisfaction
Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name?
Yes
If so, what do you like to be called?
Pet, bitch, sub, Slave, useless, small dick, you, worthless, person, slut, whore. anything degrading
Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past?
Hell no. More experience in being a sub the better they usually are

[bayman]

Are you submissive or switch?

Naturally dominant but a switch.

When and how did you find out that you have a sub side?

After I was blackmailed by a dominant girl into being her slave.

What is the hottest thing a Domme did to you?

Forced Bi, Online Exposure, Humiliation, CFNM, Cuckolding.

What is your favorite fantasy (where you are the submissive)?

Being tied up naked at a party and punished by anyone who wants to before being forced to serve them all sexually.

What do you get out of being dominated?

For me I think its the humiliation aspect that turns me on, even though I dont want to be humiliated, as well as the fact that I am naturally dominant, not having any control and forced to obey, just really gets me going. Though I also have a very small penis so I have to offer alot more options. Lol

Do you like it when she calls you by something else than your name?

Yes but name is no different.

If so, what do you like to be called?

Boy or Slave.

Would it bother you to be dominated by a woman who has been purely submissive in the past?

Being that I am currently being dominated by my wife who was my sub for the first 6 years of our relationship, i can say that its possible though more challenging for sure. In my case, due to the humiliation aspect and her having admitted my penis is too tiny, because she was my sub and telling me this, it was much more imasculating then if she was dominant. Mainly because its more shocking that she actually told me as my sub, instead of me being a sub to a woman who finds me small, not sure if you get the point. Lol.

If your looking for this thread to provide advice, unfortunately everyone is different and when your talking about 2 different people, even more variables.

I enjoy hearing people's experiences though and happy to share mine.