Yesterday's masturbation session #2

[theobsessionqueen]

Okay, so I didn't plan to masturbate yesterday. But my internet went out due to a bad storm and honestly I was still horny from the day before. I didn't get it all out of my system I guess. So, I ended up listened to some old audios I had on my phone and a few hours later I was a horny soaking mess and couldn't wait anymore. But the session initially didn't end up happening as planned.

See, I had planned to do essentially what I did the day before. I was going to use a wooden spoon instead of a plastic ruler to spank my pussy (My favorite tool currently). I had a dare saying to attach a water bottle to clothespins attached to my nipples and to let it drop a few times, I even had that all set up and ready. And I was going to ice my nipples before clamping them, because I have never tried that before and wanted to see how it felt. But like I said the plan changed.

It went to plan at first, I got my supplies (weighted clothespins, vibrator, wooden spoon, hand mirror, and the water bottle that was attached to the clothespins), took off my pants and underwear, and laid on my bed. Then I decided to do something I haven't done in a while and that was to pretend I had a Mistress with me making commands. A solo roleplay sort of thing.

My Mistress told me to open my legs wide so she could see how wet my slutty pussy was. I obviously did as she ordered and looked too through the mirror. I wasn't surprised to see how wet and creamy my pussy was. I had been listening to dirty audios for a long time. Neither was Mistress. She was very displeased with how much of a mess I was between my legs. "I didn't train you to be a common whore!" She said I needed to be punished for this disgusting act and demanded I put one weighted clothespin on each pussy lip, so that way I could spread myself open and show everyone what a dirty slut I was. I tried hard to get them on, but my left lip was so wet the clamp kept slipping off and pinching me. Mistress told me that I had better get it on there because I wouldn't like what she would do to me if I didn't. That had the clamp on real quick and I held myself open for everyone to see my wet glistening insides. The crowd in my head laughed at my whorish behavior. Mistress told me to move the clamps down lower, so I could expose my hole for the people. I was all to happy to let them see and I made sure to pull extra hard on the clothespins, so they could have a good view of my dripping hole. I had a nice view to from the mirror and I could hear the men in the crowd yelling about how they were going to slam their cocks into me. Mistress chuckled at this. I got wetter, and that only made the crowd cheer more. The weights dragged my lips down and the sensation was stunning. I'd never used these clothespins on my pussy before.

After a minute or two Missed decided my punishment was over and told me remove the clamps. They had left gorgeous marks on my pussy. My lips were so swollen and had been stretched so wide that they were still spread open a bit. And I was very very wet and ready for Mistress to play with me.

She told me to tease my clit with my vibrator. I should note that this is a G spot vibrator that is very small, not much bigger than a finger. This is important. I was very happy with this request, so I turned it on and pressed it to my clit, which sung in happiness. After a few seconds Mistress demanded I stop. She could see I was close already. This is where the plan changed and the roleplay ended.

A thing I should mention is that I have vaginismus, a condition where the vagina spasms when penatration is attempted and doesn't allow the penetration to occur. This is why I have vaginal penetration as a limit because it actually hurts. But it is possible, for me at least, in a sexual setting when I'm by myself. It doesn't feel great a lot of the time, but the idea turns me on enough to keep trying. Hence the small vibrator. It's perfect for people who have vaginismus or are just small in general because it is the size of one finger basically. This is relevant because in this moment I decided I wanted to try penatration, as I sometimes get the urge to do. So I abandoned the rest of my original plans and the Mistress roleplay.

So I got the idea to try penetrating, so I turned off the vibrator and ran it down my pussy to my entrance. After getting it wet I did a technique I found that makes inserting things easier. I actively squeeze my pussy muscles and release because it actively releases the tension that comes. Then I started to put it in. Unfortunately no matter how slow I go, how wet I am, or how relaxed and ready I am it always hurts going in. Or at the very least is very uncomfortable. But it did go in and I always get a deep satisfaction every time I'm able to take it all, not that it's much. There is something very erotic about looking down or in my mirror and seeing something sticking out of my pussy. I tried fucking myself with it, but quickly stopped. It kind of hurt and was depressed uncomfortable. So I stuck to turning the vibrator on. This doesn't usually feel good, but the day it felt decent. I was surprised. It was making my clit all fiery and I just leaned back and let it take me where it would. For the first time I think it would have made me cum.

Until a family member walked into my room. I was able to throw the covers over me and turn off the vibrator before they came in the room. She left after asking one question, but the whole time she was there I had a vibrator deep inside my pussy. I find this very hot now, the idea of being stuffed in general (remember penatration is usually impossible for me.), but also the idea of being in a deeply sexual position around someone and them having no idea. But at the time I was really frustrated because I knew that I was never going to get back into the headspace I was in before and I was so close to a first.

I turned the vibrator back on and tried again. It wasn't quite doing it for me, so I did something else I usually never do. I started rubbing my clit. I'm a vibrator girl, so I don't really have a reason to use my fingers and I'm also impatient. It takes a while before I can made myself cum this way and as someone who cums with a vibrator at the snap of a finger I find it frustrating. To most I assume this is a normal amount of time for an orgasm to build, but it's slow for me and I get desperate. There I was, mirror between my feet, legs wide open, pussy stuffed and vibrated, and my clit teased and I was getting super desperate as I SLOWLY edged closer to orgasm. I actually started begging and pleading to cum. I don't know who I was begging, but I was! Completely shamelessly. Then something totally normal happened, but it was new for me so it threw me off. I felt this rush of liquid so I looked down and I had dripped onto my sheets. A LOT. With something inside me. Again completely normal, but new to me.

I got back to rubbing and then I got really close. I could taste it and I was pleading and begging so hard I was practically weeping. I wanted to cum so badly. Anyone in the world could have walked in and I wouldn't have stopped I was that needy and ready. And it happened. I flew off, my clit burning, pussy gushing cum and squeezing the vibrator. This orgasm went straight to my head. In that floating feeling the only thought I could manage was that I had just cum with something in my pussy for the first time.

When I came back down my satisfaction was tampered a bit with the thought of taking out the vibrator. This, like putting it in, always hurts. I did it quickly and I could feel how stretched my pussy was. My hole isn't used to having something inside. That empty feeling is very satisfying to me. It means I did it.

After my first orgasm all bdsm and bondage goes out the window. I just want to cum a few times and be done. My sex drive has a long intensely powerful anticipatory stage and then a fades out real quick after a few orgasms. So I just put my vibrator back on my clit and came a few times, had a few back to back ones as well. My pussy never lost it's wetness. She was proud too I guess.

That's about it. I hope you enjoyed it and maybe learned something about vaginismus if you didn't ready. I can only speak for my own experience and maybe I sound like a fucking idiot for getting excited about some of the things I did, but as someone who has been shamed by actual doctors for not being able to get so much as a tampon or Monistat applicator tip inside me and have never been able to masturbate internally it feels good to be able to sometimes and to make new strides in that journey.

Also that you to the people who commented on my first post! I was worried no one would read it, so thanks for taking the time to read it and leave a comment with compliments and suggestions.

Anyway thanks for reading and if you have any suggestions of what I should do next, leave a comment. I take all suggestions into consideration!