[Fiction] Britain's Most Daring

[alli55]

The warble from her phone lets Maddie know that her frenetic texting hasn’t been in vain. She checks to see what’s arrived and then gives us an update: “Stacie’s just as shocked and surprised as we are! She didn’t know anything about the concert until she saw it on the show just now! I can’t believe Gemma kept it secret from her!”

“Maybe she had to, because of the contract with the TV people,” I suggest.

“It must have been so hard to not tell anyone!” imagines Maddie.

“Welcome back!” says Trixie. “Before the break we saw the pressure ramp up as our daredevils found out exactly what they’re facing in this week’s special group dares!”

“Yeah,” adds Joe, “I think I can safely say that they weren’t expecting to be doing their dares in quite the way they’ve turned out!”

“Singing in front of royalty; leading football chants at Wembley Stadium; and trying to raise as much money for charity as possible in four hours’ busking,” Trixie reminds us.

“That’s what they’re up against!” remarks Joe.

“So, let’s take a look at how they prepared!” Trixie says, taking us into the next filmed segment of the show.

This time, our three groups’ mentors provide voiceovers as we jump between the groups, watching as each of them takes another step towards being ready to perform their dare …

… “Now they know more about their dare,” begins Aleksandra, “Keenan wants the group to settle their differences.”

“What do you suggest, then?” we hear him say to Shanumi.

She shrugs. “There’s no point people who can’t sing trying to lead the crowd singing, is there?” she replies.

“But you haven’t said what we can do,” he tells her. “You can’t just sit there and be negative all the time!”

She sits, arms folded across her chest, defiantly, and looks at him, but says nothing.

“Oh, man,” complains Tariq, “this is getting us nowhere, innit!” He takes out his phone and starts swiping the screen …

… “The buskers have enough instruments between them for backing, but they need a confident singer,” Lowri informs us. “So, Mia sets about persuading Jaz.”

“Come on, Jaz,” we see Mia say, “just give it a go!”

“I can’t just sing, on my own, like that,” Jaz complains, “I need something to sing to.”

Dylan begins swiping his phone, “Let me find something on here!” he offers.

As he continues to search for a song Jaz knows, we hear Lowri tell us, “Mia knows that, if Jaz doesn’t agree to sing, they are in a difficult situation. The other three either can’t or won’t sing, so they are pinning all their hopes on Jaz.”

Dylan has found a song that Jaz knows the lyrics to and is playing it on his phone, encouraging her to sing along. When she does, we and her fellow buskers realise she has a really good singing voice …

… “The three boys decide to press ahead without Shanumi for the moment,” says Aleksandra.

We see Tariq, Keenan, and James making a list of well-known football chants on a whiteboard that they’ve found lying around the studio. Tariq is still swiping away on his phone.

“Wanting to find if there are any special chants for each team, Tariq and Keenan put google to work,” Aleksandra continues.

“Oh, what!” exclaims Tariq. “Listen to this one, innit!” He plays a clip on his phone, of fans chanting, which we can just about hear: ‘celery, celery; if she don’t come, I’ll tickle her bum, with a lump of celery’ …

… “Eilidh is putting the choir through some individual singing exercises, to try to work out how their voices might fit together best,” we hear Lorna tell us.

Eilidh begins by demonstrating the vocal exercise she wants them to do, allowing us to discover that she has a very polished soprano voice. When Ayla tries the exercise, her voice is stronger and slightly mellower, but she appears to have a little trouble with the highest notes; Gemma’s singing voice has a soft, fragile quality to it that would be perfect for the right kind of song.

“The boys’ attempts at the singing exercise really give Eilidh something to think about!” comments Lorna.

Matt has great difficulty working his way through the exercise, struggling to hit any right notes. But it is Tommy who provides the moment of surprise, both to his fellow choir members and to us, the viewers. When he tries the exercise, he hits every note perfectly, with a splendidly toned bass voice, much to Eilidh’s great delight.

“God, Tommy,” she exclaims, “you’ve got a great voice! We need tae make your voice a feature!”

“I’m not singing solo!” Tommy warns her. “No way! I’ll sing as a group, but not on my own!”

Eilidh looks disappointed, but says, “Okay, but, people need tae hear you sing!” …

… We return to the Wembley-bound group, and Aleksandra reports, “James tries to get Shanumi to take an interest.”

“We need a strong voice to lead the chants!” he tells her. “I can’t do it and nor can Tariq! And I don’t know about Keenan! But I bet you can!”

She looks at him and shrugs. “I can sing, but what’s the point?” she asks him.

“The point, young lady,” he tells her, showing the first signs of irritation, “is that I don’t want us to go out there and make complete idiots of ourselves! And you’re the best chance we’ve got of not doing that!”

She smiles, and we wonder whether James is managing to break down her defences …

… “Eilidh is really excited about the talent there is amongst the choir members, but there is one problem:” Lorna says, “Matt!”

“Matt, I dinnae want this tae sound nasty in any way,” Eilidh tells him, “but you cannae sing!”

“I know!” laughs Matt.

“No,” Eilidh corrects his misunderstanding, “what I mean is, you cannae sing with us! Your singing is so bad that it would make us miss our notes, so you just cannae sing with us! Sorry, but that’s how it is! But, I dinnae want tae leave you out, though!”

“I could just stand and look pretty!” suggests Matt, with a grin.

“What, looking like that?!” exclaims Ayla. “I don’t think so!” she adds amidst much laughter.

“Nice one!” Matt tells her.

Tommy suddenly turns to Matt and says, “Can you whistle, mate?” Matt gives an extravagant display of his whistling skills. “Why don’t we use Matt’s whistling for the instrumental breaks?” Tommy offers. “You know, instead of a guitar solo, we have a whistling solo!”

“Yes!” says Ayla, insistently.

“Aye,” agrees Eilidh, “that could work! Would you be happy with that, Matt?”

“Yeah, definitely!” he confirms …

… “With Jaz having agreed to sing,” Lowri informs us, “the group begin to plan how they might fill four hours of busking.”

“I can’t sing for four hours!” Jaz points out.

“No,” says Mia, “we’ll use your singing as highlights between other parts where we’re playing and stuff.”

“What do you do when you go busking?” Dylan asks Mia.

“We’re only allowed to do an hour at a time,” she explains, “then we have to leave for at least an hour.”

“Okay, I get that,” Dylan replies, “but, still, what do you do?”

“So, we play well-known tunes or pieces of music on a load of different instruments.”

“Like what?”

“Well, I play clarinet, penny whistle, recorder, and keyboards,” Mia tells them, “and Coops plays percussion, guitar and violin.”

“Blimey!” exclaims Jaz. “That’s half an orchestra!” …

… Aleksandra brings us up-to-date with the group she’s chaperoning. “James is still trying to encourage Shanumi to participate, while the other two think they have found some likely chants.”

When Shanumi sees the chants, all the progress James has made goes out the window. “I’m not singing that crap!” she announces.

“That’s what football crowds sing!” Keenan tells her.

“I don’t care,” she insists, “I’m not singing that!”

“Look,” Keenan argues, “you can’t rock up to a football match and sing Little Mix songs!”

She just sits there and rolls her eyes.

“Oh, this is pointless!” Keenan tells the others. He storms across the studio and out the door. Tariq looks at the other two, before deciding to follow Keenan out …

… “Encouraged by Eilidh’s enthusiasm, the choir are trying to come up with some suitable songs to sing,” Lorna tells us.

“We need tae find the right song for your voice, Gemma!” Eilidh tells the rainbow-haired girl. “It needs tae be something soft and tender!”

“I really like ‘Somewhere Over The Rainbow’,” Gemma tells her, “would that be any good?”

“Are you having a laugh?!” Matt asks, referring to the rainbow reference and Gemma’s multi-coloured hair.

Gemma belatedly realises the irony of her choice of song, and laughs. “No, honestly, I love that song,” she adds, “and I know all the words and everything!”

“No, no,” cries Eilidh, “that would be perfect! Your voice is just right for that song! We’re definitely doing that!” …

“That’s one of the songs she used to sing to me!” cries Lissie. “I love that song!”

… “After Keenan and Tariq walk out,” continues Aleksandra, “Shanumi opens up to James.”

“I can’t work with those two,” she tells him, “especially Keenan. He’s a dick!”

“Well, we’ve got a dare to do,” he replies, “so we’ve got no choice.”

“But we do, though, don’t we!” she argues.

“How d’you mean?”

“Well, think about it!” Shanumi explains her idea. “There’s two teams, right, so that means two lots of fans in the crowd, yeah?”

“Yeah,” James acknowledges.

“So, why don’t we get a proper competition going between the two lots of fans: who can sing the loudest or the best? You and me work with one lot, the other two work with the other lot.”

James ponders the idea for a moment, before replying, “I think that could work! And it would give more of a point to the whole thing as far as the crowd is concerned.”

“That’s settled then!” Shanumi declares …

… Lorna brings us the latest from the choir: “Eilidh desperately wants to showcase Tommy’s voice, but he’s proving a hard nut to crack!”

“Is there no way that we can persuade you tae sing solo?” Eilidh pleads with Tommy.

“No, sorry,” he replies, “I know I can’t. I’ll be so nervous my voice will just dry up!”

“I’ve just had an idea!” announces Ayla.

“Go on!” encourages Eilidh.

“You know that old song, ‘Stand By Me’,” she begins, continuing when everyone except Gemma confirms they do know it, “well, what if you sing it, Eilidh, but Tommy does the ‘bom-bom, bm-bm-bom-bom’ bit?”

Eilidh shrieks with delight. “Ayla, you’re a genius! That’s brilliant! God, Tommy, please say you’ll do it! Please!”

“I reckon I could do that!” he says.

Eilidh’s creative juices are really flowing now. “And Matt, can you click your fingers?” Matt demonstrates that he can. “That’s our percussion!” she decides. “Matt clicks his fingers, Tommy does the bassline, and us girls sing over the top! Brilliant! Oh my God, this is gonnae be so good!” …

… “Things are also going well with the buskers,” Lowri comments.

Mia is organising the others, checking that everyone knows what they are going to be doing. “So, I’ll get Coops to bring the van up with all our stuff loaded. That means we’ll have a couple of amps, a speaker and some mics. Plus all our instruments. Bradley, does your guitar have an amp socket so we can plug it in?”

“Yeah,” Bradley affirms.

“Good, so you bring your guitar. Jaz, you’re singing. Dylan, you can do the percussion, assuming you can keep time.” She looks questioningly at Dylan, who just looks blankly back at her. “Can you hit something when you’re supposed to hit it,” she clarifies, “not just randomly whenever the urge takes you?”

“Probably!” Dylan tells her, somewhat unhelpfully …

… “James has found Keenan and Tariq, and tells them Shanumi’s idea,” Aleksandra lets us know.

“So, what d’you reckon?” he asks them.

“Whatever!” says Keenan, sounding nonplussed by the idea.

“I think it’s the only way you’ll get her to do the dare,” James points out.

“Okay,” Tariq agrees, “let’s do it. You’re doing Chelsea, innit!” he informs James …

Back live in the studio, Trixie and Joe turn from watching the screen so that they are facing us once more.

“Well, it looks like all three groups may have finally got themselves sorted!” Trixie remarks.

“But, obviously, there’s a lot more work to be done before they’re ready to perform their dares!” Joe points out.

“So,” Trixie continues, “join us after the break on Britain’s Most Daring, and we’ll see how that goes! Don’t go away!”

Phil gets up and heads for the door.

“She said don’t go away!” Lissie reminds him, playfully.

“When you’ve got to go, you’ve got to go!” he informs her, and exits.

“And he’s got to go!” I add, eliciting a giggle from the two girls.