boy to man

ImSoHot · 08-06-2009, 06:22 AM

Michael is a 17 year old boy from a bad part of town, a bit of a bad boy, messed about it school didn’t have much going for him, he was a nice kid deep down just was in to all that gang stuff. Michael is tall and very muscular shoulders and upper body, with brown hair and blue eyes.

Bethan is a 15 year old girl from a posh part of town; she’s in to her studies and a bit of an indie rock girl, brown hair brown eyes very slim perfect girl really.

Ring ring as the phone lets of a disruptive noise, and Michael awakens from the bed he slept at. Hello as he answered the call, it was Ryan his closest friend what are doing the voice on the other like muted, what you mean said Michael I’m in bed said Michael ye I know that, today is the under 18’s club night. What is the time said Michael? Its ten past six in the afternoon, no! Said Michael ok gives me a few hours to get ready en ill ring you.

Michal made that call he promised to Ryan, ring ring, Ryan answered the phone were you he said, I’m on the bus now replied Michael. Ryan ended the call with the works okay don’t belong.
Michael pressed the button to signal the driver to get of the next stop. Thanks drive he has got off the bus. Michael as a voice in the distance called it was Ryan lets go we need to pay at the door, said Ryan. How much? Replied Michael, seven pound, said Ryan, they walked off to the queue, no trouble tonight boys said the doormen with his black long coat he looked the part.

The two boys led off to the club dance floor, were there was flashing lights, which could lead to head rush or even a headache, I needs a drink said Michael the music and light were too much for him as he Haden much sleep, what the fu Michael found himself wearing cold coke he turned around ready to throw a right hook as he turned around he was glazing at the cutest thing he has ever seen she was wearing a blue boob tube dress with blue high heels, sorry said the shy voice, Michael laughed and replied don’t worry, they started to talk for about twenty minutes. Were you been came the voice of Ryan oh I’ve been talking to? Beth replied bathan. You coming or what said Ryan? I’m going to talk to bethan for a bit longer said Michael, she looked at him with a smile on her face, I’ll catch up with you later said Ryan. A slow song started to play threw the speakers of the club, I love this song said bethan can we dance? Bethan said sure Michael replied. They made their way to the dance floor, out of no wear bethan stated that she can be dirty on occasions without a warning Michael slid his finger down her panties and she gasped for air as he inserted one finger. The night came to an end; they both exchanged numbers and agreed to text each other.

wright part two or scrap

ImSoHot · 08-07-2009, 06:05 AM

delete or part 2???????????????????????????????????????????

Slenderman - Doctor · 08-07-2009, 06:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ImSoHot

delete or part 2???????????????????????????????????????????

Option three. Be patient

Thanks.

BettyBoop · 08-07-2009, 06:18 AM

You should probably use these "quotation marks" when people are speaking, because it's a bit confusing to figure out who is talking.

seth18 · 08-07-2009, 09:17 PM

Okay, wow! This is a great starter, but HORRIBLE GRAMMAR! You don't amek it plural when needed and you do when it's not needed, and whose talking? "These should tell us" But please, continue!

Dicedarefan666 · 08-10-2009, 05:31 AM

Why do you hate english? And if you don't hate it... why do you mangle it so?

I think this story (or at least its first section) is perhaps the strongest argument for kindergarten beatings for improper verb conjugation, incorrect uses of pluralification, and a general disrespect for quotation marks.

08-06-2009, 06:22 AM	#1
ImSoHot Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: land of sheep;] Posts: 9	boy to man Michael is a 17 year old boy from a bad part of town, a bit of a bad boy, messed about it school didn’t have much going for him, he was a nice kid deep down just was in to all that gang stuff. Michael is tall and very muscular shoulders and upper body, with brown hair and blue eyes. Bethan is a 15 year old girl from a posh part of town; she’s in to her studies and a bit of an indie rock girl, brown hair brown eyes very slim perfect girl really. Ring ring as the phone lets of a disruptive noise, and Michael awakens from the bed he slept at. Hello as he answered the call, it was Ryan his closest friend what are doing the voice on the other like muted, what you mean said Michael I’m in bed said Michael ye I know that, today is the under 18’s club night. What is the time said Michael? Its ten past six in the afternoon, no! Said Michael ok gives me a few hours to get ready en ill ring you. Michal made that call he promised to Ryan, ring ring, Ryan answered the phone were you he said, I’m on the bus now replied Michael. Ryan ended the call with the works okay don’t belong. Michael pressed the button to signal the driver to get of the next stop. Thanks drive he has got off the bus. Michael as a voice in the distance called it was Ryan lets go we need to pay at the door, said Ryan. How much? Replied Michael, seven pound, said Ryan, they walked off to the queue, no trouble tonight boys said the doormen with his black long coat he looked the part. The two boys led off to the club dance floor, were there was flashing lights, which could lead to head rush or even a headache, I needs a drink said Michael the music and light were too much for him as he Haden much sleep, what the fu Michael found himself wearing cold coke he turned around ready to throw a right hook as he turned around he was glazing at the cutest thing he has ever seen she was wearing a blue boob tube dress with blue high heels, sorry said the shy voice, Michael laughed and replied don’t worry, they started to talk for about twenty minutes. Were you been came the voice of Ryan oh I’ve been talking to? Beth replied bathan. You coming or what said Ryan? I’m going to talk to bethan for a bit longer said Michael, she looked at him with a smile on her face, I’ll catch up with you later said Ryan. A slow song started to play threw the speakers of the club, I love this song said bethan can we dance? Bethan said sure Michael replied. They made their way to the dance floor, out of no wear bethan stated that she can be dirty on occasions without a warning Michael slid his finger down her panties and she gasped for air as he inserted one finger. The night came to an end; they both exchanged numbers and agreed to text each other. wright part two or scrap __________________ haaaa

08-07-2009, 06:05 AM	#2
ImSoHot Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: land of sheep;] Posts: 9	delete or part 2??????????????????????????????????????????? __________________ haaaa

08-07-2009, 06:18 AM	#4
BettyBoop Angel of Dare Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: England. Posts: 8,249 Blog Entries: 105	You should probably use these "quotation marks" when people are speaking, because it's a bit confusing to figure out who is talking. __________________ ★Boop Boop de Boop.★ female, engurrland. Ask me anything, click. My tumblr. 18+ ▼

08-07-2009, 09:17 PM	#5
seth18 Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Google Posts: 196	Okay, wow! This is a great starter, but HORRIBLE GRAMMAR! You don't amek it plural when needed and you do when it's not needed, and whose talking? "These should tell us" But please, continue! __________________ Here we go; Cool people use a ;; Duh! Likes: Candy. Dislikes: You. Limits: 'You have to cause I say so'

08-10-2009, 05:31 AM	#6
Dicedarefan666 getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 403	You're engrish haz faled u Why do you hate english? And if you don't hate it... why do you mangle it so? I think this story (or at least its first section) is perhaps the strongest argument for kindergarten beatings for improper verb conjugation, incorrect uses of pluralification, and a general disrespect for quotation marks. Last edited by Pingu; 08-10-2009 at 11:22 AM.