A random assortment of reports, thoughts, ramblings and information. Pretty much a view inside my wonderfully complicated, sometimes broken, and entertaining mind.
The fear of being outted
Posted 01-23-2020 at 07:49 PM by Butterfly
I never really considered myself too bothered by the idea of people finding out about my kinky side. I am pretty open about a lot of things to a lot of different people.
My mom knows that my husband and I are kinky, met on a kink website and that we attend kink events together and with other partners. I also give her sex toy advice. My brother knows that I am a little, and his girlfriend (who is also little) and I exchange “little” gifts for different occasions. My best friends know MANY of the details of my sex life, and one of my best friends and her husband actually attended a play party with us once.
So for the most part, I don’t hide a lot. Anybody who doesn’t know is more so because I respect the privacy of my husband and his wishes when it comes to being “outted” in his personal life.
I mean, I work at a Church, so I don’t advertise my kinky extracurriculars and I don’t discuss the fact that I have multiple partners, but even then, I have always thought that I wouldn’t be devastated if people found out.
So last week, when I logged into getDare to find a PM where I was addressed by my real name … my heart skipped a beat. I immediately felt sick to my stomach.
This member was not somebody I had ever spoken to. I searched his IP address and there showed no signs of him being somebody who may have known me under a different account. There was nothing obvious jumping out at me … and the worst part was that this random man on the internet, who knew my name, was upset with me because of an infraction that he felt was unfair.
I felt like I was in danger. I panicked.
Thankfully it was all (mostly) innocent - he found my name attached to my website (kinkywonderland.net) and he decided to use that to shake me because he was upset.
He sure did accomplish that goal. I was spooked! I still am!
With Jaro’s help we were able to get my name hidden so that this doesn’t happen again, but geeeesh! I guess I am a little more jumpy about this than I thought.
My mom knows that my husband and I are kinky, met on a kink website and that we attend kink events together and with other partners. I also give her sex toy advice. My brother knows that I am a little, and his girlfriend (who is also little) and I exchange “little” gifts for different occasions. My best friends know MANY of the details of my sex life, and one of my best friends and her husband actually attended a play party with us once.
So for the most part, I don’t hide a lot. Anybody who doesn’t know is more so because I respect the privacy of my husband and his wishes when it comes to being “outted” in his personal life.
I mean, I work at a Church, so I don’t advertise my kinky extracurriculars and I don’t discuss the fact that I have multiple partners, but even then, I have always thought that I wouldn’t be devastated if people found out.
So last week, when I logged into getDare to find a PM where I was addressed by my real name … my heart skipped a beat. I immediately felt sick to my stomach.
This member was not somebody I had ever spoken to. I searched his IP address and there showed no signs of him being somebody who may have known me under a different account. There was nothing obvious jumping out at me … and the worst part was that this random man on the internet, who knew my name, was upset with me because of an infraction that he felt was unfair.
I felt like I was in danger. I panicked.
Thankfully it was all (mostly) innocent - he found my name attached to my website (kinkywonderland.net) and he decided to use that to shake me because he was upset.
He sure did accomplish that goal. I was spooked! I still am!
With Jaro’s help we were able to get my name hidden so that this doesn’t happen again, but geeeesh! I guess I am a little more jumpy about this than I thought.
Total Comments 3
Comments
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What a shitty human, I'm sorry that happened to you. Someone like that has no business being in any kink spaces.Posted 01-23-2020 at 10:19 PM by amethyst353 
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I totally understand. I'll never forget when that guy from getdare messaged me on my vanilla Instagram....Posted 01-24-2020 at 03:08 AM by lilith_
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Oh wow what a scare. I'm glad it wasn't anything as bad as what you first thought but a real shitty thing to do to someone. I wish bad things to happen to him. *big hugs*Posted 01-24-2020 at 08:36 AM by DeepInnerFreak
