A random assortment of reports, thoughts, ramblings and information. Pretty much a view inside my wonderfully complicated, sometimes broken, and entertaining mind.
Little v. Age Play
*Disclaimer: The views expressed in this blog are only our OPINIONS! This does not mean that this is the only explanation or only way to do things. Also, if you disagree with something we have said, we are happy to listen to your points*
Introduction
As some of you may know, I have recently been exploring my little side with the help of AbusiveMaster and IceMaiden. Before I started to explore, I had posted a blog asking for advice and help to navigate my exploration. Bluetooth, approached me and we talked a lot about his experience of being a Daddy Dom. I have asked Bluetooth (a great guy I’d never call a jerkface or threaten to kill) to help me write this blog. Anything he adds will be in BLUE (in case you hadn’t guessed!).
I’ve always liked Butterfly’s blogs a lot (awwww), so I’m excited she asked me to write this one with her!
At the time she posted her blog about wanting to try little things, Maxi and I (the right way of saying that sounds so formal!) were just settling into a DD/lg relationship that felt like it was working. We’d been friends a lot longer, we’d experimented with little things she was interested in and I’d been her dom more formally for a few months - but we were just getting into something that worked here and we were excited to share that with Butterfly.
And seeing the two of you interact (freaking adorable!), really made me want to explore the subject even further.
As I have continued to explore, I have realized that there seems to be some confusion between being a Little and engaging in Age play. I think there are some commonalities between the two but there are just as many differences and it is important to know the difference.
Being Little
A little is (usually, but not always) a submissive, of any age, gender or sexual orientation, who naturally behaves or has characteristics younger than their actual age.
Being little is a part of who you are (and adorable). It is a characteristic of your personality. Even if you are in an adult mindset, you will have little aspects of your personality that shine through. These can be things like being easily distracted or impulsive, having oversensitive emotions, sleeping with a teddy, or being very affectionate.
A Little’s age can vary depending on his/her mood or environment. It may also be difficult to pinpoint a specific age at any given point, because it may not be a concrete number, but more of a sliding scale of how little you are.
Being little is not just a switch that can be turned off and on. It is always a part of you, even when you are at school, or work.
You do not have to be in a D/s relationship in order to be considered a little. However, if you are, it might be considered a DD/lg or CG/l dynamic.
I just want to point out the “might” in the above sentence because I think it’s quite important. I think there’s two very general views on caregiver related names like “Daddy” - one is that they’re just a fun but casual addition to the bedroom, the other that they’re part of a deeper “caregiver” role that goes beyond a dominant in ways that matter to a little. I’ll focus on the latter because honestly it’s the only one I really know about, and I think it’s the one littles tend to think about too.
Every dom should be caring (phew, ticked off the uncontroversial sentence quota!). So the thing that I think distinguishes CG/l ultimately from D/s is that “L”; where the dom tries to do things to help the little in ways that they wouldn’t ask for in their normal adult life. A personal example of this is that I have the only admin access to Maxi’s calendar, and I create and monitor her daily schedule - things that we’ve discussed and Maxi likes as a little, but that are only appropriate for us because of that.
A dom is going to try to help their sub in the ways they both consider appropriate regardless, the extent to which those things tap into any little side determines whether you consider the dynamic something like CG/l.
The first thing I told Butterfly, and the biggest thing I’ve learnt exploring this with Maxi is that the “humiliation/helpless baby” aspect that people often play up isn’t a necessary part of little play. This was really important to me, because although I do like to get blushy at times, feeling humiliated is a turnoff for me. This took some discussion and time to understand how to approach it, but honestly it’s way more fun to matter of factly tell Maxi that she needs her paci or to fill her sippy or to use her potty than to make fun of her for those things! I’ve come to consider this the difference between being little and wanting to engage in age play; Maxi is a little and wants to be treated as such, she likes not being treated like a grown up at times but doesn’t want to act like something that she isn’t or be made fun of for what she is.
I have always had very little aspects to my personality: I love glitter, and Disney, I love hugs and cuddling, I am emotionally needy and unpredictable, I have a hard time focusing on certain tasks, I love napping (I sometimes think I should have been a cat), and stuffies, and coloring. Although I can “adult” well and often, it is something that I find taxing at times.
I find myself having to sometimes fight my inner little in order to be able to adult. I can only fully let it out when I am in a safe place. This has only happened on a few occasions. However, small parts of my little personality do slide out each day. For example: I have an eeyore and jelly beans on my desk at work. I go to adult coloring nights and watch Disney movies with my friends, and I get more giggly and bubbly and excited than the other girls do.
Just like Butterfly said being little is a part of her personality that doesn’t get switched on and off, being a daddy isn’t something that gets switched on and off either for me, and it becomes a core part of any dynamic. On the other hand, if I reeeaallllyyyyy push myself I can sometimes, for just a moment, turn off the part of me that wants to make my little subby blushy by reminding her just how little she is!
Age Play
I will be the first to admit that I do not have a lot of personal experience with Age Play and therefore I am not going to pretend to know everything about it. However, I think the biggest difference in my opinion, between being Little and engaging in age play, is that age play is about playing the role of a different age. Age Play may even be described more as a Fetish or a Kink (although it doesn’t have to be).
When engaging in age play. The age player will choose a specific age and will then conform to the general characteristics of that age. Your natural personality has no bearing on what age you choose, you can choose to be a baby or 5 or 17 or anywhere in between. An age player can and is able to easily switch between playing a chosen age and acting their actual age.
Age play can easily be something you do inside a committed D/s relationship, or something that you might do casually with a play partner.
I too won’t pretend to know everything about age play, but I consider the way that I explored this with Sammy to be more age play rather than her little personality - so I asked her permission to mention that too. With Sammy I would play up the “helpless baby” side, while as a little she doesn’t act as a baby - that was an exaggeration which I’d consider age play. I mentioned the distinction to Maxi and she said she likes that too in small doses, which is what we found previously. I really think that is all about what works for you! And you seem to find the right way to make it work with both Sammy and Maxi. So I guess with Sammy I’d push age play a lot and with Maxi we’ve found a more delicate balance.
This blog is continued HERE
Total Comments 3
Comments
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Thank you so much for this! It made me ridiculously excited to see that definition of being a little, because that is precisely what it means to me. I don't do age play, It's just not my thing; but I have always been a little, I just didn't have something to call it before. This made me smile so much. Yay for part II!Posted 04-07-2017 at 10:44 PM by naughtylittlegirl 
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It took me a long time to get there as well. I always confused age play with being little and I just didn't like the idea of age play. It just wasn't for me, and so I was kind of confused. I'm a huge advocate for making things work for you and stepping outside of the defined role, but having a definition as a starting point is super helpful. I'm glad you enjoyed our blog!Quote:Originally Posted by naughtylittlegirl
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Thank you so much for this! It made me ridiculously excited to see that definition of being a little, because that is precisely what it means to me. I don't do age play, It's just not my thing; but I have always been a little, I just didn't have something to call it before. This made me smile so much. Yay for part II!Posted 04-07-2017 at 10:50 PM by Butterfly
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I have often been confused between the two, so this blog is surely very helpful. Knowing this difference, I think I can now say that I am certainly not a little but I would perhaps like to experiment with age play.
So yes, the two are indeed very different.
Thank you for enlightening me!Posted 04-08-2017 at 05:39 AM by Jaro
