I'm so happy you are able to trust me enough to help you on this journey together. I have enjoyed being there for you and helping you grow past things you couldn't do before.

Surprising someone is fun, especially your Sub. Surprising someone with something you have never talked about is not. Anyone who ever plays with me will know I will try everything I plan to use on a Sub before hand on myself. New shock device? I shocked my balls with it first. New collar? I put it on first. Nipple clamps? Put those bad boys on. Not only do you need to experience what you are going to put someone through but you also need to listen. Do I have a higher pain tolerance? Is there something about this my sub will find frightening that doesn't phase me? Being a Dom is so much more then being in control. Your Sub is lending you their control so you can play with it and torture them within their limits. Pushing limits if properly discussed and in a good environment is fine but what that person did is so far from fine.

I love you my Butterfly <3

P.s The spider gag isn't that large... :P

What happens in a top's mind when they suddenly decide to surprise you with a limit ? Do they go from dom to abuser ? Was the blog about gags already posted and maybe inspired him to try something (stupid) he thought would work ?

I assume you never played with that person again ? Is there no way to use a safe word in the gagged situation ?

Butterfly thank you!!!

I really value learning about others experiences/outlooks especially on subjects I have little/no experience in.

As a naturally monogamous person, I have always struggled with the thought of a close primary partner having an intimate relationships outside our dynamic. It hasn't come up much but I'm sure it may do at some point.

I guess it stems from insecurity that I may not be giving them what they need. However I did touch on the subject with a friend recently and although they didn't go into great detail, I think we both agreed that communication was imperative.

Communication shines brightly in your example. Everyone knowing each others relationship to you and how you all fit in to the "family" is a lovely way to look at it.

My experience has been with a sub wanting to Domme/Top someone else, which to me is a different type of dynamic so I can more easily not feel so worried/jealous if that makes sense?

I think my biggest concern would be if my sub needed alternative dominance. Like a kink that they felt I was not able to administer at or an emotional connection they were not able to get from me as their Dom. I think would really struggle with that aspect.

But as I say, any type of poly relationship would be fairly new to me. As with anything new I would need time and lots of communication to feel secure. I really appreciate your post and opening my eyes a little to a more complex yet seemingly more love filled experience <3

Thanks for posting this. It's always valuable and appreciated to gain insight into how others make the incredible variety of kink relationships work.

I just skimmed through that spanking recording, that was amazing 😍

Great list! Good luck accomplishing them!

That is quite a list. I hope you get to do as many of them as possible.

That's really awesome, I am so happy for you Miss! And your Dom is very lucky to own you!

I like that it doesn't look tight, they usually look uncomfortable. And congrats ♥

I'm a bit selfishly glad I'm not the only one who quickly allows myself to experience this kind of feeling on this site, I thought I was being too intense, you made me feel kinda valide.

All the good experiences we choose to get in life are always worth it, it's not worth looking back and questioning them, enjoy them while they are there and deal with the pain once it's time to, it's the cycle of life and it applies to everything, like having a pet that eventually leaves you or dies, only thing that matters is knowing that you really wanted that thing when you were enjoying it, and fully enjoying the moment in the present.

Gosh, I know what you mean. It is a harsh readjustment for sure. I hope you feel better. Hopefully you two will see each other soon!

Habe funktioniert, Butterfly

OMG I have missed so much, but I am glad all is well. If you are interested in catching up, please let me know.

Sounds like you are in for an adventure

Congrats, I hope you enjoy your time together, that's adorable.

Yay!!! So happy for you, comrade! It is very pleasing to hear about all the good things going on in your life. And congrats on that promotion!!!

So happy for you.