Great posts. While I can confirm most of them for myself, the most important thing I learned from the many people met, men, women and others alike, despite many many books about their similarities, everyone is different. Just because I like the color pink, that isn't true for every other woman.

Many issues are common sense or it was easy to get to know if you care. You want someone to put food into their vaginas? How about reading up if it's safe and sane? And many others still need experience and knowledge about the person. You want to know if someone has any fears so severe they might get a heart-attack, or at least react when they freak about the propopsal to play with spiders alone. Just an example.

I'd still appreciate if someone tried to put up the same list for men. Just out of curiosity. Or is it just food and sex they need? What about freedom and dragon-cave-time?

Many thanks

Like Butterfly mentioned above, all women are different, so I can only speak for myself when I say this, but I know that when I'm playing I'm darn near silent most of the time.

Butterfly and her... sources... have made some very good points here. Especially the pictures one. It doesn't matter why a woman won't amuse you by sending pics (just because you're a man, doesn't mean you are entitled for us to show you everything... I know not all of you think that, but it seems a great deal of you do) just know that she's said NO for a reason and stop hounding her as to "why not?" Most of the time when you do that we know you aren't genuine and you're just looking for some quick material to "get off" with.

Finally, an instruction manual for women!

But seriously, this is really good and helpful for a lot of us men! Thank you!

I wholeheartedly agree with all of these and I see these things and it almost makes me not want to be part of the human race sometimes. Since you asked three of my main pet peeves on this site, but I won't go into detail. 1) People who still think that AMA's or dare me anything go in the truth or dare categories respectively, they don't learn where to post. 2) People who randomly message you asking them to ask you when to pee or what underwear to wear. I don't know you, why are your randomly messaging me I don't care, go waste somebody else's time. 3) I understand that some people aren't the most fluent but when I see a truth and the only answers are yes or no with no explanation after it kind of irritates me. I guess I just like to read interesting things. So sue me lol. I have some others but I don't want overcrowd your blog and I need to get ready for work.

I fully agree with everything you mentioned! It's nice to finally see someone on getdare talking about all these

Can agree with these. Be nice if people thought things through and grew a ton of respect. Wouldn't be such an issue.

This is an amazing report. I really get a sense of what went down. Thanks for writing this!

This is excellent! Your reports are always so thorough and fun Miss!

I'm glad it all helped and you had fun!

Thanks for sharing in the fun!

I love the idea of saying thank you instead of sorry.

You could simplify your 2018 rules 1 & 2 to:

1. Take care of yourself
2. Take care of Mr Devious



(And sorry for posting so many comments all in one go)
(I mean thank you for tolerating so many of my comments in one go)

You are my denial soulmate.

I hate denial. I hate being denied. 3 days would be a dislike for me too. (I can go longer than 3 days, but that would be because I'm busy and focused on work, not because I'm being denied)

And I hate denying. I enjoy giving pleasure. I enjoy when my sub cums. Denial feels like taking away the best part of having a sub: making her cum! Although, I admit, as a dom, I could do more to make denial fun rather than a chore. And I can see how, as a sub, being denied would make a sub feel subbier.

Hmmmm. Now you have me thinking!

This is a really interesting setup. Thank you (all) for sharing. This sounds so very intense, so I can understand the appeal. I think if I were Jaro, I would find it very tempting to go easy on myself on those times when proof wasn't required. (But that's why I'm not Jaro!)

I'm curious what the program is that was mentioned to hide the files and remove them from the computer? (My kids are getting older and a regular hidden folder might not work for me much longer!)

My Dearest Butterfly (and her wonderful husband):

I must express my concerns, in the nicest way possible. Please don't hate me. I've known you for a little while, and you are the nicest, kindest, and most generous of souls. You give freely of your time, your thoughts, your emotions. You share both your pleasure and your pain so that others may learn. It is a joy to know you.

This time, though, I worry that you are not being as kind, as generous, and as nice as you usually would be. If it were a friend going through your current pain (whatever it may be), would you be so harsh as to tell them they should be feeling better and moving on? Would you tell them that loads of people go through this and wonder if they shouldn't be so affected?

I think not. I think you would be nice, kind, generous. You would know just what to do, and that would be to hug them and love them and let them take the time they needed, without judgement & without comparison. You wouldn't even think such things, as none of us are thinking about you now. You are wise, and you know that every person is different. Even for a friend that appeared to move on quickly, I know that you know that what people look like outwardly is so very different to what they feel inside. That maybe they "moved on" not because they moved on, but because they wanted to look like they moved on.

The zombie feeling will wear off. Time does not always heal, but it softens. You adapt to the new normal. That is not to say you have moved on. There are some things (and you mention grieving), that will always be part of you. You will never "move on". And that's ok. There are some things you wouldn't want to move on from.

The sun rises, the sun sets. The world goes about their business, while you feel on pause. Yet, perhaps you are not the one who is a zombie? Perhaps the zombies are the ones rushing around, mindlessly unaware of their own place in the vastness of the universe. Perhaps, my friend, you are not the zombie, but the person briefly awaken from their slumber?

I know I am hardly ever here, and we do not talk like we once did. I hope my words are taken to be words of love, and not words of judgement. You are a most wonderful person, and so very loved. Re-read the responses from your friends, on this post and many others. And love yourself as others love you.

Your faithful and never present friend,

Madl

PS: I like your face.

Butterfly,

Please, please, please don't hold your emotions in. Let them out. Scream, cry, yell, do what you need to but don't hold them in, and when you do what you need to do, don't reign it in.

By holding it all in and not talking about it with people when it's fresh it will be harder to get over. While you might be able to move on with your life, you can still get stuck emotionally.

Anyway, I'm not trying to drag you down more here. I just want you to realize what holding things in can do to you. Please just talk about it and deal with it, no matter how much it hurts now, because if you wait it will be even harder to do.

Although we all love happy butterfly, we love you in any form. Take all the time you need. Be as selfish as you want. It's going to time. No one can ask you to just move past it. I love you gorgeous. It will be okay eventually.

Dear Mrs. Butterfly,

Take all the time you need. There is no "proper amount of time" to heal emotionally. We're all different people. We feel things differently. Only you know when you are ready to move on. I am glad that Mr. Devious is being the charming "Knight in shiny armor" that you need him to be. We all care about you.

<this is short because I couldn't think of anything witty / funny / whimsical to cheer you up nor have any sage advice to help out>

Have as many of these as you need.

I bet Mr.Devious will assist with delivery.

https://media.giphy.com/media/XpgOZHuDfIkoM/giphy.gif

This is just some random nonsense because I want to say something but I don't know what to say.

Just don't feel bad about not feeling good.

That some people are able to shrug off or get over the greatest disasters in "reasonable time" doesn't really speak well of them.

In a sense: it's not really up to you to decide how quickly you should be able to reach acceptance (if that is something you should do). I mean, it's not a decision you can make. So don't waste your energy on worrying about that.

Your smiles are still real although you feel like a zombie. Zombies don't bother smiling. You are still yourself even though you may now feel numb.

You need more time. (I have lots of it - but I don't know how to send it.)

*hug*

Dear Butterfly,

I don't know what happened either. It sounds very sad. But better cry for days to laugh again, then being a Zombie, which isn't fun at all. Allow yourself to break down, so friends can pick you up and care. The saddest for me is when you are unable to cry at all.

I wish you a sad movie or a healthy spanking session in the arms of a person you can let yourself fall into, who cares for you.

Let yourself go for oncr. We try to keep ourselves together undrr all circumstances way too often anyway.

Whatever you do, I wish you the very best

Take your time

Dear Butterfly,

As I am readfing this, the only thing I want to do is comfort you. But I don't know how.

I'm not the one to advice you or say other things, but what I am thinking is, you haven't had enough time to heal. I can feel from your words you have been hurt. And unfortunately these wounds can leave a mark.

Take care and take your time to heal. I am sure you will feel better in some time. Especially in the caring hands of Mr. Devious.

Hey butterfly

I really don't know what happened but can only guess. Whatever it is, please be strong but don't try to rush with absorbing your feelings and returning to normality if you need more time to heal. Everything gets better with time but don't try to time your feelings. It isn't possible. Take care

Lovely upload butterfly and congratulations on so many posts! I absolutely love that 2nd picture its so artsy, naughty and passes the rules all at the same time!

I would so much like to have someone to cling to. Emotionally, mentally... even physically.

You don't have "issues". You are "lucky". There's a slight difference.

(Your writing [for which I thank you, though it made me all maudlin] inspired me to listen to... well... mostly John Lennon. He had "mother issues".)