Rules have helped me
Posted 03-24-2018 at 10:46 AM by Pariahterror
In the last weeks I have gotten some good and bad news. And bad news seems to have more impact and can stay longer. Especially when those things are here to stay.
Due to some happy events I was given some rules to obey. And it wasn't actually planned to get rules not associated to my celebration thread. But I am happy to obey them.
A day or two later I got the bad news (it was actually already known, but I might have denied it or thought it might be something different). It didn't get through to me at first. As I was doing my cornertime as stated in my rules. The realisation seeped in some more and more. But as I was obeying my rules, I was being able to remain myself. The spanking was there too to keep me happy and in control. As I want and will obey them.
And what I'm thinking now is that due to these rules. I had something to cling on. To have something that will stay at the moment. Something I didn't want to let go of. And it was one of the few things I coud cling to as I just moved. I don't want to give this message through the phone or just talk to someone on the phone about it. And I don't want to tell such a thing to people who I actually don't really know well. It isn't something you tell strangers especially if people closer to me don't know it. (apart from my blog here as I needed to tell at least someone, and I felt safe doing so).
Another point is that I am just not ready to talk with the people around me about it. What impact it has and see their reaction. A rule is much easier for me to cling to. And maybe feel safe and in control. And it won't talk back. It won't put me in the center of attention.
But what is it about these rules that kept me steady. It was because I have to do those daily. I need to put time and effort in them to do them well. The rules I'm talking about are about cornertime, spanking and edging.
These all have in common that it was something I do consciously. And something I was ordered to do. I have my toenails painted, but they don't give the same effect as the three above, but it does make me feel good though. As painted nails don't need daily attention, but the spanking etc does.
What I have learned from this latest experience is that rules are good and can be used to get support from. Especially when your environment is changing (or has changed recently). They are also very helpful if you lack people skills. There is one aspect about these rules, that support you, which I find important (apart from being happy to do them). This is that the rules shouldn't happen automatically, but you need to put effort into following them daily.
As a last item, I want to thank Butterfly for her support in this blog post
Due to some happy events I was given some rules to obey. And it wasn't actually planned to get rules not associated to my celebration thread. But I am happy to obey them.
A day or two later I got the bad news (it was actually already known, but I might have denied it or thought it might be something different). It didn't get through to me at first. As I was doing my cornertime as stated in my rules. The realisation seeped in some more and more. But as I was obeying my rules, I was being able to remain myself. The spanking was there too to keep me happy and in control. As I want and will obey them.
And what I'm thinking now is that due to these rules. I had something to cling on. To have something that will stay at the moment. Something I didn't want to let go of. And it was one of the few things I coud cling to as I just moved. I don't want to give this message through the phone or just talk to someone on the phone about it. And I don't want to tell such a thing to people who I actually don't really know well. It isn't something you tell strangers especially if people closer to me don't know it. (apart from my blog here as I needed to tell at least someone, and I felt safe doing so).
Another point is that I am just not ready to talk with the people around me about it. What impact it has and see their reaction. A rule is much easier for me to cling to. And maybe feel safe and in control. And it won't talk back. It won't put me in the center of attention.
But what is it about these rules that kept me steady. It was because I have to do those daily. I need to put time and effort in them to do them well. The rules I'm talking about are about cornertime, spanking and edging.
These all have in common that it was something I do consciously. And something I was ordered to do. I have my toenails painted, but they don't give the same effect as the three above, but it does make me feel good though. As painted nails don't need daily attention, but the spanking etc does.
What I have learned from this latest experience is that rules are good and can be used to get support from. Especially when your environment is changing (or has changed recently). They are also very helpful if you lack people skills. There is one aspect about these rules, that support you, which I find important (apart from being happy to do them). This is that the rules shouldn't happen automatically, but you need to put effort into following them daily.
As a last item, I want to thank Butterfly for her support in this blog post
Total Comments 8
Comments
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Posted 03-24-2018 at 10:47 AM by CSasha -
Posted 03-24-2018 at 10:50 AM by Pariahterror -
Posted 03-24-2018 at 10:52 AM by Blue Fox -
Posted 03-24-2018 at 11:16 AM by CSasha -
Posted 03-24-2018 at 02:05 PM by Butterfly -
Posted 03-24-2018 at 07:28 PM by perkygirlie -
Posted 03-25-2018 at 07:09 AM by PrincessJessica -
Posted 03-26-2018 at 10:49 PM by Pariahterror