Happy and Sad news.

[sk0073r]

I think she is the right person... I love her, i can imagine spending the rest of my life with her. So, on valentines night, we decided we were ready, and I lost my virginity to her. It wasn't her first time though, but that didnt matter. The moment was perfect.
However...
it didnt go very well I must say - lost it half way through, but even so...
I just feel a little funny haha. Not bad funny, good funny.



On another serious note...
I feel really sad about something...
We have been talking about some stuff for the future, like moving in together etc. I noticed on her bebo one of those question things, and it said "Do you want children" and her answer was " depends "
When I asked her what she meant by depends... she said she might not be able to have kids... It will put her at a great risk because of the cancer she had when she was young - Shes not fully recovered yet...
I told her i didnt want to take any risks, i didnt want to put her in danger...
So I asked her, when the time is ready, if she would like to adopt. She thought it was a great idea, I told her i'd love to be a father... Then she asks me, "to my own child?"
I love her too much for the risk... But i know she wants her own child - she also said that night, that if she did get preg, she was going to keep it, even if it meant she would die and the child would live... Yesterday she went with her friend whom was getting an abortion. We are both rather upset