19/FtM AMA!!

[transmasochist]

Hey everyone! I'm new here, so I thought I'd introduce myself by letting you ask me some questions! I'm not sure what kinds of questions you're gonna ask, but sexual and non-sexual are both fine!

[transmasochist]

I'm still up for answering questions, so feel free to leave some!
I've answered a lot of truth posts to get into this, so I'm definitely ready to share!

[Jaro]

1. Since when have you known you identify as a man?
2. Have you had hormone treatment or are you going to?
3. What about genital reassignment surgery?
4. If you were to buy any toys, which toy would you get first?

[transmasochist]

Originally Posted by Jaroface

1. Since when have you known you identify as a man?
2. Have you had hormone treatment or are you going to?
3. What about genital reassignment surgery?
4. If you were to buy any toys, which toy would you get first?

Thanks so much for the questions!!

1. I've known subconsciously for pretty much my whole life; I was aware that I felt weird about my gender when I was 10, but properly knew I was male when I was 14.

2. Yep, I've been on testosterone for nearly 2 years.

3. I've had top surgery (mastectomy) and a hysterectomy. I haven't had any surgery to alter my genitals and I'm not sure if/when I will. I probably will want to one day, but I want to be sure I'll keep sensation and functionality and aesthetics, and all that. It's not something that's going to happen soon.

4. I've thought about this a lot, and it's really difficult to say. I want a vibrator, but I'd need something powerful to get me off (I'm not hugely sensitive) and things get expensive quickly. I'd also really like to practice more anal, so beads and butt plugs are high on the list. I think I need to save more money before I buy anything, and also look around a lot to work out what's best for me. Anytime I shop around online, I end up putting like $200 of toys in my cart then giving up.

[WILDGUY]

Are You more attracted to males or females?
Have you dated both?
what is dating like?

[transmasochist]

Originally Posted by WILDGUY

Are You more attracted to males or females?
Have you dated both?
what is dating like?

Thank you!!!

1. I'm gay, so I'm attracted to men.

2. I don't have much dating experience, but I have dated one girl (before I worked out I was gay) and one guy.

3. I'm guessing you mean as a trans guy, yeah? Both people I dated were people I knew before I came out as trans.
I dated the girl back when I was still presenting as female, and she was a lesbian. While we were very close, the relationship just didn't really feel right (which I now see is because I'm not attracted to girls). We're still good friends, though.
The guy I dated was gay and cis (ie, not trans), and I knew him for a few years before coming out. We dated after I told him I was a man; he accepted me completely and was fine dating me as a gay man. Emotionally, dating him was great, but physically it was nonexistent because it was long-distance. We did masturbate together over skype, though.
I'm not looking to date anyone at the moment, but I know I would find it very intimidating.

[AnonymousUser]

Describe your number one sexual fantasy

[transmasochist]

Originally Posted by AnonymousUser

Describe your number one sexual fantasy

Thanks for the question!!

If we're talking things I'd actually want to do, then I'm not really sure because I still have to explore what I'm actually comfortable with, BUT that's not what this question is.

My fantasies get dark and dangerous pretty quickly. I've talked about this briefly in another thread:

My darkest fantasy would probably be to become a 24/7 slave with no hard limits and spend most of my time tied up and being edged or forced to cum over and over, and being tortured; lots of spanking/whipping/flogging, heavy clamps and needles to torture my nipples and genitals, and just generally being in extreme pain and unbearable amounts of pleasure.

Basically, my number one fantasy is generally to be completely at someone else's mercy and have them go unbearably hard on me. I want to be pushed past my limits until I can't even think and everything is just about the pain and the pleasure, both to the extreme.
I'd probably also add some heavy anal (huge, fast, rough, etc), and it'd be nice if I had balls so they could be busted (and I'd like a proper dick, too *endless dysphoric sighs*). Also throw in a gorgeous male celeb to be actually doing all this to me, and that's even better!


None of this I would probably actually ever do (not to this extent, anyway), but god it gets me off.

[NinjaDog]

What sort of porn do you typically watch?
Are there any types (of porn) that you just can't get off to?
Do you play any video games?
What's something in the next year you're most looking forward to?

[transmasochist]

Originally Posted by NinjaDog

What sort of porn do you typically watch?
Are there any types (of porn) that you just can't get off to?
Do you play any video games?
What's something in the next year you're most looking forward to?

Thanks!!

1. I usually watch gay BDSM stuff, but the specific thing I watch will vary. Sometimes I really feel like watching some forced orgasms, sometimes more pain, sometimes edging, sometimes heavy anal...

2. Yeah, generally anything with urine, scat, or vomit; absolutely can't do it! Things that are very extreme, like with proper harm and blood, are also difficult. I'm sure there are other things, but nothing off the top of my head.

3. I didn't play many games growing up, but I'm trying to get into more now. In fact, just now I was playing Undertale (if you know it; I'm playing the genocide route and I've been trying the Sans fight forever. I spent the last hour getting up to the final move of the final attack every time I tried but just not able to beat it lmao. I've been stuck on it for a few weeks and playing it for an hour or so every few days). But I haven't played the kinds of things that 'everyone has played' because my parents never really let me have any games as a child. I have a Wii, but barely any games for it (I mostly just play Mario Kart).

4. Hmm... That's a tough one. The thing I'm immediately looking forward to is my current semester of uni finishing so that I can have a break, but I don't really have any long-term plans right now. Last year was all about transitioning, but at the moment I'm just kinda living day to day.

[Drilldon]

Originally Posted by transmasochist

Thanks for the question!!

If we're talking things I'd actually want to do, then I'm not really sure because I still have to explore what I'm actually comfortable with, BUT that's not what this question is.

My fantasies get dark and dangerous pretty quickly. I've talked about this briefly in another thread:



Basically, my number one fantasy is generally to be completely at someone else's mercy and have them go unbearably hard on me. I want to be pushed past my limits until I can't even think and everything is just about the pain and the pleasure, both to the extreme.
I'd probably also add some heavy anal (huge, fast, rough, etc), and it'd be nice if I had balls so they could be busted (and I'd like a proper dick, too *endless dysphoric sighs*). Also throw in a gorgeous male celeb to be actually doing all this to me, and that's even better!


None of this I would probably actually ever do (not to this extent, anyway), but god it gets me off.

Would you be happy with this type of relationship long term ?
How about severing a couple, in a 'household' or would you want to be the only one?
How much self-pain have you inflicted for sexual pleasure?
Have you tried water torture?

[transmasochist]

Originally Posted by Drilldon

Would you be happy with this type of relationship long term ?
How about severing a couple, in a 'household' or would you want to be the only one?
How much self-pain have you inflicted for sexual pleasure?
Have you tried water torture?

It's an interesting idea because, while it's my biggest fantasy in THEORY, I have no idea how comfortable I'd actually be with that kind of setup. I have huge fantasies about having control taken away from me, but I do actually have a lot of trouble giving up control in my real life. So:

1. With the specific relationship I described, I wouldn't be happy with it long-term. If I was going to realistically have a similar relationship, I'd change a few of the terms. I would still likely keep some limits (like urine, scat, and feminisation) and I would definitely have to slowly work up to the extreme pain, but I think I'd be able to do that with enough work. It would take a lot of trust and a lot of time, but I may be happy with that relationship.

2. I'd say no; I can be a pretty jealous person. I would want my master in this scenario to be my partner. Maybe I'd be able to do it if I was completely certain that all three of us were emotionally equal in the relationship. I wouldn't want to feel inferior in that situation. I would be fine feeling inferior with just one person, because I wouldn't be worried that he'd abandon me for the other guy.

3. Hmm, I'm not sure what the most painful thing I've done is. Some examples of especially painful things spring to mind:

• I got a huge binder clip and put it on my dick (which is how I refer to my clit). The smaller ones are fine, but I could barely open the clip enough to get it over my dick because of how strong it was. I wasn't able to close it completely because I felt like it would have actually damaged me, but I let it close until I couldn't bear the pain anymore.
• I used string to tie my 1L water bottle to my dick with it full of water. It was probably because of how my specific anatomy works, but the string pulled extremely painfully, especially with the weight of the water. The string also tightened a lot and I ended up having to carefully cut it off afterwards because I couldn't get it loose enough to take off.
• One time I clamped my nipples tight enough that the peg cut into the skin and it bled. I don't think it was too badly painful, but I guess it was one of the harder things I did.
• Ice can also get very painful. Holding a large amount of ice against my genitals for 10 minutes was an extremely painful task that I struggled with a lot.

I know I could take more pain if I worked on it, so I guess I should keep practicing! (I remember I used to not be able to handle a single peg on a nipple, pfft, now I can't get off without a peg tightened by another peg closed over it)

4. I haven't, and I don't know much about it. I've heard that it can be very psychological and I'm pretty scared of that kind of thing because my mental health hasn't been great. I have a lot of worry generally about losing control, and I much prefer physical torture to psychological.

[Rowan330]

What are you looking for on getdare?

[transmasochist]

Originally Posted by Rowan330

What are you looking for on getdare?

At the moment my main goal is to work on exploring some kinks to see what I'm into and to challenge myself a little by asking for dares from others.