The Trip [FICTION]

[and090909]

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The Trip

Disclaimer and warning: This is a fictional story and is not in anyway or has ever been or ever will be real or related to anyone or anything living. Any similarities to individuals, animals, vegetables, minerals, microbes or aliens are completely coincidental – even the stuff that’s loosely based on me! Reading this story may cause calluses, warts or rashes. Should this occur, please discontinue use. Prolong use may also cause loss of direction. For directions lasting more than four hours, please contact your doctor.

This is a story about exploring the inner slave feelings. It is written from two points of view - first the slave (Andrew) and then the master (Ev)- each will give their point of view of the same situation.


Chapter 1

Andrew 1

The day had finally arrived. I was about to leave on a trip that would be a leap into my fantasies. For years I had been chatting online about being a slave. I don't really know why I had these thoughts but they sometimes consumed me. Until now this has always remained in my imagination and even though I would imagine situations in detail they were still not real.

I met Ev in a diaper chat room. I was a bed wetter up until 3 years ago and Ev was a diaper lover. We would chat from time to time and became friendly. After a while I told him about how I would want to be a slave. He was more amused by it than anything else but he agreed that I could be an online version of a slave for him. I could tell that he didn't have his heart into it but it was still fun to talk to him and we kept it up for a while.

Eventually, he decided that as his slave I should provide his diapers. This created a real problem for me since I was not given much spending money and diapers were expensive. I agreed to do it because even though it was a real sacrifice for me, it kind of felt right. It was close to something a slave would have to do and it intensified my interest in being a slave. In the back of my mind I always thought that Ev wasn't really into any of my slave talk but he was nice enough to talk to me about it and I'm sure he liked getting diapers.

During one chat session, I was whining about my mixed feelings about slave hood. Some days my interests were strong and other days I wanted nothing to do with it and wished the feelings would go away. That day though, Ev said something very interesting that I had not thought about - I would never really know about being a slave unless I really tried it out. He said that if I wanted to know for sure I should come out to him and try it.

Over the next few chats we explored the possibility. We talked about what it would be like to be his slave in a real life situation. Many of the things that I imagined I would do as a slave, such as clean his room and laundry, would not be possible on the trip. But I could do many of the other things including getting him drinks and food and taking care of his total diaper situation – providing, changing, and disposing. Ev laid down two major rules and I agreed with both: nothing sexual and, if I changed him, no unnecessary touching.

He insisted on talking on the phone before finalizing plans. I was pretty paranoid about using my phone so I went to the mall and called him from there. We talked for a few minutes and decided that he would meet me at a hotel which is near his house. We'd meet in the lobby at 1 PM and talk for a while. If we both agreed then we would continue. If not then I'd just leave. I told him I would plan to stay for a few days and I could always leave early if it didn't work out.


Ev 1

I met Andrew on a diaper site. I always thought he was a little strange but seemed pretty nice. He was a bed wetter when I met him but has since stopped. He always liked to talk about how he got bullied when he was younger. I don't know why anyone would want to tell other people about that but whatever.

He also liked to talk about being a slave which I also thought was pretty weird. He'd say how he would clean my room and get me stuff that I wanted. He also talked about changing my diaper - which at times was a little creepy. I would let him ramble on about most of this stuff - I'd usually be chatting with others or playing video games so I didn't mind. I was able to use it to my advantage by having him buy diapers for me. I didn't want to be an asshole about it and just use him for diapers so even though he was strange I continued to talk to him.

The arrangement was working out great. I’d get him to get me diapers and stuff just by signing on to chat. He never asked for anything in return. Things started to change though the last few chats. He started talking about whether or not he should continue this slave thing. I didn't care either way even though I did want to keep on getting diapers. I told him he would never really know unless he tried it and that’s how we got to talking about him coming out here. I wasn’t really serious about it but it kind of kept him interested and I got him to get me new plastic pants.

He started talking more about actually making the trip and I went along with it. I even let him call me to talk about it, but I told him never to call me on my cell unless I gave him permission first. Last thing I would want is for him to call me while I was hanging out with friends or something!

Anyway, he was serious about this and was going to drive out. He already knew my address from having the diapers shipped to me but I didn’t want to meet him here. I told him I’d meet him at his hotel which was about a mile away from my house.

[and090909]

Chapter 2

Andrew 2

The plan was to leave Friday morning and stay until Tuesday. I looked up the hotel he mentioned and booked it for 4 nights. It would take about 5 hours to drive out there. I told my parents I was meeting a friend I made during the internship I worked on earlier in the summer and they bought it. The only stipulation was that I would have to pay for it out my own account. My mom agreed that $1000 would be fair and she withdrew that from my account. I had also been saving cash on the side to but him more diapers and had another $80.

I left the house at 8:00 AM. I looked up adult diaper distributors that were on the way and planned to stop. This place was like 2 hours along the way. When I got there I bought 2 cases of bambinos, a thick cloth diaper, a box of wipes, diaper disposing plastic bags and some lotion. I also saw they had plastic pants and onesies on sale and bought 2 of each. The bill came to $180.

I made good time got to the hotel at about 12:30. There was nothing nearby except for a 7-11, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell and Applebee’s across the street. I checked in and the clerk gave me a card key for the room. I left all the diaper stuff in the car and just took my bag up with me. I used the card key to open the door. The room was on the third floor and it was one of those where you had to put the card key in a slot on the wall to operate the electricity. I guess they don’t want people leaving the A/C and TV on and leaving the room.

It was a nice size room which had 2 double beds a round table in the corner, desk, cabinet with a large flat screen on it and a bathroom. There was plenty of room in the hallway once you got in through the door and the bathroom was on the left. I threw my bag on the chair next to the table and went to the bathroom to take a pee. I nervously kept looking at my watch - it seemed every minute took an hour. I didn't know when I should go down to the lobby.

I was nervous because I didn't really know if he would even show up. I started thinking I probably shouldn't have even checked in because now I'd be stuck paying for the night if he doesn't show. Then I thought what if he shows up with his friends? What if he was only leading me into a trap? What if his friends kick my ass and throw me in a ditch? I looked at my watch again - holy shit it was 1:00 PM!

I took the card off the slot in the wall and ran to the elevator. The elevator door opened right up and I stepped in and hit the lobby button. My heart was pounding and my head felt numb. I heard the ding and the door opened. I stepped out into the lobby. The check in clerk was at the desk but no one else was around. I walked outside past the driveway to the sidewalk and looked both ways but no one was there. I went back inside and sat on one of the couches in the waiting area. I saw they had free coffee so I got up and got myself a cup and grabbed a free newspaper.

After 15 minutes, I walked back outside. I went to the sidewalk and walked a few hundred feet in each direction and saw no one. I went back inside and sat down. Another 15 minutes went by it was now almost 2:00 PM. I started to think that he wouldn't show. I thought about calling his cell phone but he specifically told me never to do that unless I had his permission ahead of time. I didn't know what to do. I sat back on the couch and drank another cup of coffee. This was pretty bad coffee and I was only drinking it out of nervousness.

It was now 2:00PM. I decided to give him 10 more minutes. Maybe I misunderstood and instead of 1PM he meant 2 PM? Another 20 minutes went by and I walked outside again – but no one was there. I started thinking if I should call him – but knew he’d probably be pissed off if I did. Plus it wasn’t going to make him show up if he didn’t want to.

Another half hour and I decided to walk across to the 7-11. I browsed around and bought a bottle of water – all the time looking back across to the hotel. As I started walking back to the hotel, I caught a glimpse of someone riding a bicycle heading in this direction. It was too far to see who it was. Could this be him? Rather than going back I stayed on the sidewalk looking. The bike rider got closer, and closer. I backed up into the driveway as the rider approached the hotel riding on the street. It looked like it could be him.



Ev 2

On Friday I woke up around 11:00 AM and met my friend behind the school. We got high and hung out. After a while we started getting hungry and went to get some food. We rode to 7-11 and it wasn’t until we came out of the store and I looked across the street that I remembered – holy shit – Andrew! I looked at my watch and it was almost 1:30 PM. I could see into the lobby and someone who could be Andrew was sitting in the lobby. I didn’t do anything right away since I was with my friend and didn’t want to rush him off. I knew Andy would wait.

We rode back to the school and rode around a bit and after about an hour his mom called him and told him to come home. It was now about 3:00 PM

[codymich]

Interesting start. I'll keep reading if you post more!

[and090909]

Thanks! I will be posting 2 more chapters tonight.

[and090909]

Chapter 3

Andrew 3

He rode into the driveway and called out to me, "Andy?"

"Hey" I replied my voice cracking from a mixture of fear and relief. "Thanks for coming."

He simply answered, "No problem, I would have been here sooner but I lost track of time".

There was no attempt to start the conversation. This immediately had the feeling of one of our chats where I would type 10 lines to his one word. I asked, "Um, where do you want to go to talk"?

He shrugged and said “Why don’t we just talk here? We can walk to a park and talk on the way.”

“OK,” I said as I started walking and he sat on his bike and walked it alongside me, “So, are you still willing to try this out?”

He nodded and said, “Indeed, wouldn’t have made you come all the way over here if I wasn’t willing.”

I suggested, “OK, so should I go over my limits?”

“Sure, but I know them”, he replied.

I started to list my limits, which I had mentioned many times before: “nothing that will make me sick, cause damage or extreme pain; nothing public or that would cause someone else to find out I was your slave…”

“Wait”, he blurted. “What if I wanted to tell a friend of mine, that you don’t know, that I have a slave – would that be against your limits?”

I paused to think for a moment then asked “Why do you ask? Do you have someone in mind?”

“Maybe… or maybe I’m just asking. So,” he repeated, “is it against your limits?”

“Well, I guess it would be OK.” I thought for another moment and asked, “Would it be more than one person?”

“Would it be a problem if it was?” He quipped.

I offered a compromise. “Well, for now, can we leave it to one person? Then we can talk later about changing that? OK? And it would have to be someone who doesn’t know me or any one I know.”

“Mmmkay.” He replied.

“OK,” I continued. “That was two, umm, three is no shaving, cross dressing or body marks. Four is nothing involving blood, puke or poop, unless it’s part of changing a diaper.”

He nodded, “Indeed.”

I finished listing my limits. “The last one is about money. You can control what I have on me but please be reasonable.”

“Will you give me the money to hold and how much do you have with you?” He asked.

“No,” I replied. “I hold on to it but you get to control how I spend it. I have a little over $800 left.”

He smiled and said, “Excellent, that should be enough.”

I wasn’t sure how to respond to his last comment so I said nothing. We had walked in and around the small park and were headed back out form where we got in.

“I bought you two cases of diapers and other stuff so I can leave it with you when I go home.”

“Excellent, bambino bellissimo’s I hope?”

“Yes, two cases. So, um, what do you want me to call you?”

“I don’t really care. I’ll leave that up to you.”

“OK, um, so we’re starting right now?”

“Yes, indeed! Let’s go get something to eat. There’s an Applebee’s right by the hotel we can go there.”

We walked there, locked his bike up, went inside and got seated right away. The place wasn’t really crowded. He wanted to order mozzarella sticks as an appetizer and some real expensive entre but I talked him into a less expensive entre and ordered an appetizer to share that we both liked. He seemed a little put off by that but he went along with it. He was also OK when I suggested we share a dessert too, even though I think he wanted his own. I didn’t want to go through so much money on the first day.

When the check came I picked it up and paid. We talked about what to do next. “Do you want to get diapered up?”

“Na, not now, plus I got to be home before 8:00. Why don’t we go back to your room and watch a movie? We can get some snacks at 7-11.”

“We just ate, why don’t we skip the snacks?”

“Whatever…”he blurted.

He unlocked his bike and walked it across the street. “Do you want to put the bike in my car? You can put it in the back.”

“Yea, good idea,” he replied.

I opened my car door and put the seats down in the back so the bike fit in. I moved the diaper boxes to the side. We went up to my room. I walked in and put the card key in the slot. Ev turned on the TV and started flipping through the movies.

“Hey, Wrath of the Titans is on here – let’s order that!”

“Well, I’ve already seen it, how about The Devil Inside?”

“Yea that’s fine, I guess...”



Ev 3
I got there late and felt a bit bad about it but, little by little, he started to piss me off. First he goes over his limits for the thousandth time! Then we get started with it and he’s complaining about my order and anything else I wanted to get.

The last straw was the movie. He didn’t want to order the movie I wanted. This wasn’t working out how I expected. I didn’t care if he just wanted to hang out, but, if we were doing the master slave thing then it was time to shake things up.

We watched the movie he wanted – which wasn’t bad. It was almost time to go and time to get my point across.

[and090909]

Chapter 4
Andrew 4

The movie was done and I knew he had to go home soon so I asked, “Is there anything I can do for you before you go?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact there is. Strip down.”

“Strip?!” I shrieked in a surprised voice.

“Yes, down to nothing and do it quickly.

I was shocked at the change in his tone but I did what he said. I took off my watch and got my wallet and car keys out of my pocket and put them on the dresser. I stepped out of my sneakers then took off my shirt and put it on the bed. I undid my belt and slid off my pants with the belt still on them. I was standing there in just my boxers and socks. I looked up at him and it was obvious he meant for me to take everything off. I removed my socks then slid my boxers down and slid out of them.

He didn’t even look at me, instead he ordered, “put the clothes you just took off in your suitcase, sneakers and socks too.”

I did what he said. It felt weird being there naked in front of him but it was all happening too fast to think about it. I put the clothes in the suitcase and closed it up.

“Good, now hand me your car keys”

I walked over to the dresser, picked up my keys and handed them to him. He then proceeded to pick up my suitcase and head for the door. He lifted the card key from the slot making all the power in the room go off. He opened the door to the room and left.

I was frozen for a few seconds. Was he coming back in? I waited a minute or two then walked to the window to look out. I saw him in the parking lot walking to my car. Was he going to take my car? Would he leave me here? OMG what was I going to do? I watched as he put my suitcase in the car. Rather than get in the car though, he took out his bike, got on it and rode off.

While I was slightly relieved for a minute, I soon started to freak out again. What if he didn’t come back? Even if he does come back – when will he? I walked over and looked at my watch it was almost 8:30 PM. It was starting to get dark out and, since I didn’t have the card key, I couldn’t operate any electricity in the room. I was hoping that he would come back tonight and that he only did this to show me he was in charge.

I started thinking back on the day. Did I say or do anything that would piss him off? I bought him diapers, food and a movie – well he did want to see another movie. I should have just ordered what he wanted. And I didn’t let him have what he wanted at the restaurant too. I’m such an idiot!

It was now almost totally dark outside and in the room. There was only some indirect light from streetlamps in the parking lot. It was also hot since with no electricity I couldn’t run the A/C. I sat in bed thinking of what I would do if he didn’t come back. I know there are towels in the bathroom – I could always put one of them on. I wanted to take a shower but there would be no light in the bathroom.

It felt so weird being naked like this and alone. I was nervous not knowing what was in store for me and that was a bad feeling. Strangely though, knowing it was him that left me here like this and the feeling that I was totally in his control and at his mercy felt kind of right. It was almost 10 PM now and it became apparent that he wasn’t coming back tonight. I decided that I wouldn’t do anything about this until tomorrow and until then I’d just deal with this situation.

My mind started to wander thinking about what he would make me do if he came back, how long I should wait to see if he came back, and how I would get myself out of this situation if he didn’t come back. It was a long day and with my mind wandering I eventually fell asleep.

Ev 4
I put his suitcase back in his car got my bike out and sped home. It was almost 8PM and my mom would have a shit-fit if I was late. Whew, just got in under the bell. My mom was just putting dinner on the table. I ate quickly and went to my room to go on the computer.

Cool, Angela was online:

TheEvMan: Hey
AngelEyes: Sup
TheEvMan: n/m u?
AngelEyes: bored
TheEvMan: hey guess what!
AngelEyes: what?
TheEvMan: you know that diaper friend I told you about
AngelEyes: oh, no – you’re not gonna talk about dat diaper thing again r u? lol
TheEvMan: lol – don’t worry I wont wear one in front of you
AngelEyes: lol cool
TheEvMan: ne way, he’s here
AngelEyes: he’s there?! With you now?
AngelEyes: hey diaper slave – lol
TheEvMan: he’s not here now in my room but he’s here staying at the hotel
AngelEyes: holy shit! for real!?
TheEvMan: yup
AngelEyes: are you gonna go meet him? Be careful!
AngelEyes: you should take Jake with you just in case
TheEvMan: it’s cool, I already met him
TheEvMan: he’s legit lol
AngelEyes: OMG r u gonna be his master for real lol
TheEvMan: idk lol I guess so
TheEvMan: he already bought me 2 cases of diapers
TheEvMan: we hung out this afternoon
TheEvMan: he’s a bit annoying but not so bad
TheEvMan: you there?
TheEvMan: Ang?
TheEvMan: hello0o0o000o
TheEvMan: 
AngelEyes: hey sorry I gtg my mom is freaking out on me ttyt
AngelEyes: AngelEyes has signed out

No one else was online so I logged off and turned on the TV. Time to relax. I went into my closet and got my last bambino. I knew I had two more cases now so no need to conserve. I put the diaper on and turned on the xbox. I had to pee really bad so as soon as I taped it up I relaxed and let it flow out. I loved these bambinos - they absorb so well.

I played video games for another two hour and peed again in the diaper. I planned on sleeping in this – it can handle at least another two pees. It was now almost 11 PM so I climbed into bed and went to sleep.

[and090909]

This is my first attempt at writing a story. I'd appreciate any comments (good or bad) and advice as to whether I should continue.

[HondaJunkie93]

Being a first story, I would have to say very good job. Not to good at giving critizism or anything, but all i can say is don't take any bad comments to heart, if you enjoy writting it, thats all that matters. I'll be keeping an eye on this story. Good work

[and090909]

Chapter 5
Andrew 5
I woke up the next morning slightly in a daze and not fully aware of my surroundings. It took a minute before I realized where I was and what had happened last night. I got out of bed and went to the bathroom to pee. There was a small tube of toothpaste and a mini toothbrush courtesy of the hotel on the bathroom counter and I used that to brush my teeth. I walked over to see what time it was – 8:30 AM.

I figured if Ev was coming back he wasn’t about to show up this early. At least now I had light from the window – but it was still pretty dark in the bathroom since it was near the door and away from any natural light. I started opening all the draws. There was a bible, some coupons, a room service menu and a hotel magazine, which I pulled out a hotel magazine and started reading. It listed all the things to do nearby. There was a big theme park close by that me and Ev talked about going to.

I realized that this was a big part of being a slave – waiting – doing nothing – just being available. So this is what it feels like to not have control of your own time. I started to wonder what Ev was doing – probably still sleeping. I wondered if he thought about me being here last night and if he’ll even remember this morning.

I got back in bed and dozed off for a little while longer. At 9:15AM I woke up for good and took a shower. It felt good to have the cool water run on me since it was getting even hotter in the room. I dried off and sat back on the bed on top of the covers. I continued to look through the magazine and found a crossword puzzle in the back – lame but at least it was something to do.

I heard a knock on the door and jumped out of bed. I walked over to the door and before I could look out the peephole I heard “Hello, housekeeping”. Yikes! I stepped to the side and opened the door a crack and told her I was still here and that I would call when I left. Only a few minutes had passed when I heard a click by the door. Ugh, is the housekeeper back!?

I started walking to the door when it swung open and there was Ev. And, behind him was this girl! I was speechless. I wanted to cover myself up but just stood there with my mouth agape. One look at her I realized I was the second most shocked person in the room. She was shorter than Ev, had straight dark hair, tanned skin and big brown eyes. She was wearing a blue t-shirt green shorts and flip flops. Ev was wearing olive green cargo pants a black t-shirt and black combat boots.

Evan proceeded to introduce me “Hey Andrew, this is my friend Angela”.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you”. I replied. I saw her mouth was as wide open as mine and she put her hand to her mouth in this seemingly permanent OMG gesture. The shock faded into a permanent smile. I don’t think I have ever felt more embarrassed in my life and Ev seemed so matter-of-fact about it. Ev put the card key into the slot and the A/C instantly came on.

“Wow it’s hot in here”, he complained. He walked over to the TV and turned it on and Angela walked with him. I just stayed where I was. “Hey Ang, you want to watch Wrath of the Titans”?

“Sure” she replied, as Ev grabbed the remote and ordered the movie.

“Andrew, can you get me the room service menu?” he asked.

I went to the draw and handed it to him, passing Angela on the way. She couldn’t stop smiling as she watched me move across the room. He looked at the menu and then passed it to Angela. “Oooo they have waffles”, she cooed.

“Sounds good, Andrew, can you call this in – Two orders of Belgium waffles with vanilla ice cream, side of bacon on each toast, basket of muffins, pitcher of iced tea. Ang, do you want anything else to drink?” She shook her head. ”OK, Andrew, call it in!

“Should I just order this? Can I add to the order?”

“You can do what you want but no eating until we’re done”.

I walked to the phone and pushed the room service button, waited to be connected, and placed the order. I got the feeling that I shouldn’t order anything for myself even though he said it was OK. After the order, Ev, took off his boots and sat on the made bed. Angela was sitting at the table on a chair but I got up and made the other bed in case she wanted to sit there.

Ev pushed play on the remote and the movie started. I didn’t know where to sit, so I sort of sat on the floor leaning against the bed. It felt weird and a little gross sitting directly on the carpet with nothing on. It wasn’t long before there was a knock on the door. I looked over at Ev hoping he would get up to answer the door but he didn’t move. Thinking quickly I asked “Can I put on a towel to answer the door”? He nodded as he continued to watch the movie and Angela giggled.

I shouted “hold on” to the door, went to the bathroom and put a bath towel around me. I grabbed my wallet off the dresser and answered the door. The attendant wheeled a cart into the room and said “$50, please.” I gave him $60 and, wanting him to leave as quickly as possible, told him to keep the change”.

I took the covers off the food and put a plate of waffles in front of Angel on the table and placed utensils next to the plate. It looked like Ev was going to stay on the bed so I brought him the plate and utensils on a tray. I poured both of them a glass of iced tea. I was about to bring Ev his glass but instead he put the movie on pause and sat down at the table.

I unpacked the muffin basket and toast and put both on the table. The ice cream was in a separate container. I walked to the table with it in my hand, “do you want me to put it on the waffle for you.”

“Indeed,” replied Ev.

I spooned out a scoop and spread it on Ev’s waffle then did the same for Angela. I tried to stay a s far from the table as I could when I served them since it felt weird being that close while naked. I stepped back a few feet from them but stood by waiting to do anything else they needed. It was uncomfortable and Angel felt the same when she said. “Can you move away, I can’t eat with you standing there staring.”

Ev followed with, “yes, leave us, but stay close.”

I walked away and walked into the bathroom. I sat on the toilet with the door open. I could hear them talk and laugh and then I heard the movie go back on. I sat there while the movie played. I even had to pee but was afraid to do it and then have them hear me flush the toilet. Coincidently, just at that time, I heard the movie paused and in walked Angela. With a slight giggle she said, “I have to use the bathroom.” I walked outside while she closed the door behind me. She did her business and I heard her flush, wash her hands. She walked out and Ev came over and went in. I heard him washing his hands and then saw him walk out. They put the movie back on and I went back into the bathroom to wait. Ev peed but didn’t flush nor did he put the seat up. I cleaned the pee off the seat with toilet tissue and used this as an opportunity to pee myself and then flush.

I sat back down on the toilet and waited. The movie soon ended and I hear Angela tell Ev that she had to go. She passed the bathroom on her way out and smiling said “Bye Andrew” followed by a giggle. After the door closed I asked, “Is it OK for me to come back into the room now?”

“Indeed,” was the reply.

“May I clean up now?” I asked.

“You may.”

Ev was looking at the movie menu using the remote while I cleaned up the table. The waffles were almost all gone with the exception of a small bitten piece on Angela’s plate. There was no iced teal left in the pitcher but there was ¼ left in Ev’s glass. There was also half a piece of toast and a half eaten muffin. It was now almost 1:00 PM and I was starving. I was nervous to ask but I said, “May I eat the leftovers?”

“You may.” He replied again.


I gobbled up the toast, half muffin and piece of waffle and drank the little tea left in the glass. I was so hungry I even licked the syrup off the plate.


Ev 5
I woke up having to pee badly. Quickly remembering I had diapered up with a bambino bellissimo last night, I relaxed in bed, brought my feet towards me a bit bending my knees up and let it flow out. It felt so good to relieve myself this way – it’s one of the best parts of wearing a diaper. I finished peeing slid my feet back down, rolled over and went back to sleep.

I woke up again when Angela called me on my cell. “Hello,” I answered.

“Hey Ev, did I wake you?”

“Na I had been up.”

“So, are you going to see your friend, err I mean slave?”

“I am, would you like to accompany me?”

“OMG, like are you serious?”

“Yup.”

“Sure! I’m in! When you going?”

“Come by in an hour.”

“OK, see you!”

I told her an hour because I needed to take a quick shower plus I wanted to enjoy this totally soaked diaper for a little while longer. I love wearing diapers but the clean up kind of sucks. I actually wish Andrew was here now to handle that.

I stayed in bed for another 20 minutes then got up and took a shower and got dressed. I bagged the diaper and put in deep inside the kitchen garbage. Angela showed up a few minutes later. I grabbed the card key and his car keys and we walked over to the hotel.

When we got there I just went to the room, opened it with the card key and walked in. I probably should have warned Andrew that I was bringing Angela but the look on his face was priceless and Angela loved every minute of it. She has paid for me many times at movies and food and this gave me a chance to return the favor.

I took full advantage of the opportunity ordering room service and the movie that I wanted to see yesterday. More importantly, there was a real change in Andrew’s attitude. At one point I had him call in a food order for us and he was too afraid to order anything for himself. It was amusing in a way and I played it up a little. It was funny watching him eat our leftovers especially the piece of toast which Angela had dropped on he floor and the waffle piece which she bit and spit out.

After the movie Angela had to leave so I started looking for what to do next. It was almost 1:00 PM and I started thinking that maybe we can make the 2:00 PM show at the movies.

[and090909]

Chapter 6
Andrew 6
I finished cleaning and eating looked over to Ev who was still flipping through the on demand movies.

“Hmmm, there are no good movies left on here,” Ev complained. “Let’s go to the movie theater.” He stuck his hand in his pocket, pulled out my car keys, tossed them to me and said, “Here, go get your suitcase and bring up the diaper and supplies.”

I paused for a moment. This would clearly violate my limits because it would involve going out in public, but I was hesitant to challenge him now so I pointed out, “I don’t have anything to wear to go outside.”

“And that’s a problem because…?”

“How can I go out naked like this?”

“Hmm this does present a problem of sorts.” He paused and though for a second, then got up undid his belt, took off his cargo pants and handed them to me. “First, put a towel on. Then, put these on.”

He sat back down on the bed in just his boxer briefs. I went to the bathroom and put a towel around my waist then came back and slipped on his cargo pants. I was barefoot and shirtless but I wasn’t about to complain. I opened he door and put the safety bar out so the door wouldn’t close all the way, went downstairs and brought back my suitcase and the box of diaper stuff.

I walked back in the room and immediately took off his pants and handed them back to him. “Thanks for allowing me to wear them,” I said. “So, do you want to get diapered up,” I asked nervously?

“I do think it is time,” he replied.

Just hearing those three words made my heart beat rate instantly double and I felt myself starting to shake. I didn’t even think about asking to get dressed myself. I opened one of the cases and took out a new diaper. He was laying flat on the bed still in just his boxer briefs and turned to the side so his feet were off the bed. I approached him with the diaper in hand and reached out to remove his boxer briefs. He lifted up slightly so they slid off from under him easily. I pulled them past his muscular looking thighs, down his legs and all the way off his feet. Holding his feet up I then opened the diaper and placed it between his legs. He again lifted up so I can slide the diaper underneath him. I pulled out the bottom flaps moving the diaper in perfect place then pulled the front up and taped it on both sides. I folded his boxer briefs neatly and put them in the dresser draw and went to put his pants on for him sliding them on each foot. He finished pulling them up himself and did the button and belt.

“OK, lets go to the movies – I want to see the Dark Knight,” He ordered, “and it starts in 30 minutes.”

I opened my suitcase and quickly took out clothes and got dressed. We went downstairs and, on the way to the car, I told the front desk that they could clean the room now.

It took about 15 minutes to drive to the theater. When we got there I bought two tickets, a large popcorn and bladder-buster size drink for each of us. The movie was great and we both had a good time. Other than buying the tickets and food it was like we were going as friends. He was really cool to hang out with and he didn’t even mention the diaper or anything else that had happened that day. I did have to pee before we got back in the car and I asked Ev if it was OK to go and he said yes.


Ev 6

Angela knows I like diapers but she’s not really into it at all so once she left I was looking forward to diapering up. I made Andrew go down to the car to get the diapers. I didn’t even have to tell him to diaper me. As soon as he got back from the car he asked me – what a good slave!

It was kind of exciting waiting for him to diaper me. I closed my eyes throughout the whole thing and moved my butt up off the bed to make it easier for him. He did a good job of tucking and taping the diaper and, as an added plus, he didn’t have to touch me anywhere.

I rarely wore diapers outside my house and wearing it to the movies was cool. I peed for the first time as soon as we sat down. I had drunk most of the iced tea that morning and this pee was from that. Andrew bought me a huge drink so I peed two more times during the movie – which was about 3 hrs. The last pee was in the car on the way back to the hotel. I was a little worried that it might leak but it didn’t. As we pulled up to the hotel, I was badly in need of a change.

[and090909]

Just posted Chapter 6. Please leave comments and let me know what you think (good or bad) and let me know if I should continue.

[Saphir]

Hey :3

Originally Posted by and090909

Just posted Chapter 6. Please leave comments and let me know what you think (good or bad) and let me know if I should continue.

I can imagine how frustrating it is when you put so much work into a story but you don't get a reply, hence I decided to review this, even though it is not the content I usually read. Please prepare for direct criticism (which is ment for improvement). ;D

This is actually one of the longest reviews I've ever written on here, so please read it. All of it! ;P

Generally I have to say: In my opinion you did a couple of mistakes, which I'm going to point out, but in general you are not a bad writer and should keep going. (Otherwise I wouldn't tell you how to improve, would I ;D )


Stylistically:
There are a few points that can make the reading a bit boring, even though you provide good content, let me show you:

Originally Posted by and090909

The plan was to leave Friday morning and stay until Tuesday. I looked up the hotel he mentioned and booked it for 4 nights. It would take about 5 hours to drive out there. I told my parents I was meeting a friend I made during the internship I worked on earlier in the summer and they bought it. The only stipulation was that I would have to pay for it out my own account. My mom agreed that $1000 would be fair and she withdrew that from my account. I had also been saving cash on the side to but him more diapers and had another $80.

I left the house at 8:00 AM. I looked up adult diaper distributors that were on the way and planned to stop. This place was like 2 hours along the way. When I got there I bought 2 cases of bambinos, a thick cloth diaper, a box of wipes, diaper disposing plastic bags and some lotion. I also saw they had plastic pants and onesies on sale and bought 2 of each. The bill came to $180.

(One little typo, besides I didn't notice any huge mistakes so far, which is good.)

As you can see from what I marked, you start almost every sentence with the subject (the acting "thing" in a sentence), which makes the text repetitive to the reader, not only from all the I but when you keep writing only with subjects even from these others.

There are many ways to start a sentence another way, let's take some example from what I am working on recently:

Walking down the stairs, she can hear her parents voices through the door. It sounds as if they were having a fight. Great. Hopefully they won't spoil the whole morning with sermons about responsability that she, as a sixteen year, old probably has now, or the babies kids seem to be having at every corner nowadays and God knows whatever else she ought to take care of now.

But as Charlotte enters the kitchen, she is spared at first. Her parents just look over to her briefly, but then return to their conversation, if much more quietly than before. Either they want to wait until the whole family sits in the café, like every year at her birthday, or they will start as soon as she sits down to start her breakfast.

Alternation is the key!

Also a little thing many do:

He shrugged and said “Why don’t we just talk here? We can walk to a park and talk on the way.”

“OK,” I said as I started walking and he sat on his bike and walked it alongside me, “So, are you still willing to try this out?”

He nodded and said, “Indeed, wouldn’t have made you come all the way over here if I wasn’t willing.”

Why not just:

He shrugged “Why don’t we just talk here? We can walk to a park and talk on the way.”

“OK,” I said as I started walking and he sat on his bike and walked it alongside me, “So, are you still willing to try this out?”

He nodded “Indeed, wouldn’t have made you come all the way over here if I wasn’t willing.”

Let's have a look at this, it looked way too long to me on the first look:

TheEvMan: Hey
AngelEyes: Sup
TheEvMan: n/m u?
AngelEyes: bored
TheEvMan: hey guess what!
AngelEyes: what?
TheEvMan: you know that diaper friend I told you about
(...)
TheEvMan: we hung out this afternoon
TheEvMan: he’s a bit annoying but not so bad
TheEvMan: you there?
TheEvMan: Ang?
TheEvMan: hello0o0o000o
TheEvMan: 
AngelEyes: hey sorry I gtg my mom is freaking out on me ttyt
AngelEyes: AngelEyes has signed out

Yep, loong Best would be to add things in between. Especially in the end you could have described how he sits on his computer and AngelEyes doesn't reply and he waits and get's annoyed about it to split up this part a bit.

---
So, finished reading it
Yea diapers are really not my thing xD but your writing style (besides the things mentioned above) isn't too bad and you have the endurance to write much so honestly you should keep writing.

However, let me point out a few more things:

The day had finally arrived. I was about to leave on a trip that would be a leap into my fantasies. For years I had been chatting online about being a slave. I don't really know why I had these thoughts but they sometimes consumed me. Until now this has always remained in my imagination and even though I would imagine situations in detail they were still not real.

The story starts pretty "rough", right in the first paragrapg it's about becoming/being a slave.

I met Ev in a diaper chat room.

And the next sentence is about diapers.

It depends on what stories are people searching for. But if people are not into either of this, this draws them away from your story quickly. In my opinion it's better to start of more calmly and then get into the real stuff, this way readers can develop a "relationship" to the characters and have more acceptance/interest in what they are doing. For example many things included in Shiny Demon's "Sisters Sleepover" are not my thing, I am still eagerly waiting for every chapter, because many other things are and he didn't start with the stuff I don't like first.

Also let's have a look at posting frequency:
Chapter 1 09-24-2012 06:57 AM
Chapter 2 09-24-2012 07:13 AM
Chapter 3 09-26-2012 04:42 AM
Chapter 4 09-26-2012 04:45 AM

Also your chapters are sometimes a bit long, especially the first chapter should be relatively short (in comparison to the rest), including the text you write before the chapter, because in my experience people are "scared" of too long texts... same with chapter 5, the others were okayish.

What adds to this is the fact that there is almost no posts inbetween your chapters, and especially 1 and 2; and 3 and 4 give like no opportunity for posts between them because they are posted too quickly after each other. Better type it in a document and safe it. Take a few days, await feedback and then post.

Because otherwise the reader sees a huge mass of text and no replied and that firstly means s/he has to read a lot and secondly no comment is no good advertisement.

Additionally I personally don't really like the 2 person perspective in the way you do it. You can use 2 points of view, that's not a problem, but it's better to fit it together in one story, rather than telling the same from different points of view, because this can also take away much suspense/excitement, because the reader always knows what both persons think and can't add fantasy, think of why someone is doing something, etc.

That's it for now...
I really recommend you to keep writing, however it might be good to consider to rewrite this a bit (stilistically and maybe also regarding the point of view) and post it in (partly) a bit shorter chapters and with more time between the posts and then post it again, in a few weeks. (I'm not fully sure if this consents with the forum rules, however I guess it should be fine when you actually rewrite things and change the stylistic style and whatnot to improve your story, because it would be stupid if you improve a lot but nobody reads it because they won't read the 6 chapters before.)

I hope this was constructive and you keep writing and publishing on gD. :3

Love
Saphir

[and090909]

Chapter7
Andrew 7

We hit a bit of traffic on the way back since it was rush hour and I had to pee really bad. Ev and I talked throughout the ride but he never mentioned the diaper. I’m pretty sure he had wet it because I could faintly smell pee in the car. We pulled back into the hotel, parked and went back up to the room. Housekeeping had been there and the room was totally clean with each bed made. Ev went straight for the bed sat down on it and said, “time for a change.”

“Do you want me to put another diaper on you?” I asked.

“Kay” he replied. “And the onesie too.”

I went to the diaper box, which I had stashed on the floor in the closet, and pulled out a new diaper, the box of wipes and ointment. I took a deep breath and walked over to the bed. I was very nervous but tried to focus on the task at hand. He picked up the remote and turned the TV on as he sat on the side of the bed with his feet hanging over the edge. I reached down and lifted his shirt up and off him as he raised his hands to assist. Then as he laid back, I leaned in undid the buckle on his belt, opened the button on his cargo pants and slid down the zipper. As I pulled the cargo pants open I could see the yellow on the diaper and I got a strong whiff of pee. Wow he had really soaked this thing. I pulled his pants down under his butt and bunched them down his legs so he could spread his knees apart.

“Take them all the way off,” he ordered.

I knelt down and untied the laces on his boots and pulled them both off, then slid his pants all the way down and off his feet.

“Socks too,” he added.

I pulled his socks off then stood up. He was now lying back on the bed just wearing the diaper. I leaned in and undid the tapes and pulled the diaper front away from him. “Wow, the pee smell is so strong,” I commented as I fully opened the diaper.

I grabbed a wipe from the container and, being extra careful, started cleaning the front area. I lifted his legs up with one hand and with the other grabbed another wipe and started cleaning his bottom. I pulled the wet diaper away and slid it to the side on the bed then grabbed the new diaper and placed it under him. I grabbed another wipe and went over the whole area again making sure it was totally clean. I noticed a slight raw spot by the crease of his thigh so I put a little ointment on that spot and the surrounding area then taped up the diaper. I then slid the onesie over his head as he lifted off the bed for a second. I pulled it down and snapped it in place by his crotch.

I then turned my attention to getting rid of the very heavy used diaper. I put the used wipes inside the diaper and rolled it up using the tapes to keep it rolled tight and put the diaper in a plastic bag. Ev was now laying on the bed watching TV. I sat down on one of the chairs at the table and watched TV along with him.

After two episodes of Hardcore Pawn, Ev sat up on the edge of the bed and commanded, “Come over here and get on the floor in front of my feet.”

I walked over to him on the bed and knelt down like he asked. He reached out and pulled my head towards him until my face was resting up against his crotch and held it there. After a few seconds I could feel and hear that he was peeing. I could literally feel the vibration and in a few seconds I started to get that faint smell of pee again. It seemed like he peed for almost a full minute. After the peeing stopped, he didn’t let go – instead just held my head there and ordered, “Start taking slow deep breaths. I want you to get used to the smell of my pee so you don’t have to comment on it in the future.”

I did exactly what he asked breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth. The fact that the diaper was taped closed and the onesie helped to limit the smell – not to mention he had so much to drink that his pee was probably diluted – but I still got the smell. It wasn’t terrible – it wasn’t really even terrible when I changed him before but the longer he held me there the more I got used to it. After about 5 minutes he said, “You may get up now.”

I got up and asked, “Do you want me to change you again?”

“Na, not yet,” he replied. “I could use a snack and drink though. Why don’t you go across the street and get me beef noodle cup and an iced tea.”

I headed down and went to the 7-11 and got him what he asked for. When I got back he answered the door fully dressed and taking the noodle cup and iced tea from me said, “I have to get going, but before I leave I need you to strip again.”

I walked into the room and started to disrobe. I thought to myself that he was going to make me spend the next 12-14 hours naked in the dark and with no A/C again. He then handed me a diaper and said, “Now, put this on.”

I sat on the edge of the bed and put the diaper under me pulling the front on and taping it on each side.

“Good,” he said as he walked over to me with a pen. He made lines over the tapes on to the diapers – about 10 lines in all directions on each side. “Now, you are not to take this diaper off under any circumstance. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He walked out and, much to my surprise, he left the card in he slot.


Ev 7
After the movie, which was great, I waited for Andrew to go pee. This of course was not an issue for me as I had peed several times during the movie. It felt great sitting in the theater with the diaper on with no one but Andrew knowing and being able to relax and watch the movie. The car ride back was even better. It felt good sitting in the car – the seat was a bit warm and I relaxed and peed again as he drove.

By the time we walked back into the hotel room, I knew it was time for a change and right on cue, he offered to do it. I thought it was going to be a bit weird but it really wasn’t. I wanted to just chill in just the diaper for a while before I went home and told him to put me in just that and the onesie. He did everything perfectly and nothing was awkward except that he made a comment about the smell of me pee. I mean, WTF? What did he expect it to smell like? It seems no matter what he always seems to say or so something to annoy me or piss me off.

I didn’t say anything – just let him finish and I started watching TruTV. I had to pee again almost from the moment he changed me but I was trying to hold it in as long as I can. I like the feeling of doing that then letting it go all at once and these bambinos soak it all up.

After an hour or so it was really time to let it go. I was going to start peeing when I got the idea of making Andrew get a close up sniff of it. I made him put his face right in front of my diaper as I peed. It was pretty funny but he did exactly what I told him to do and didn’t complain. I don’t think he got the full effect though because I had had so much to drink.

Before I left, I made him put on one of the diapers and told him not to take it off. I know he used to be a bed wetter and he did not like wearing diapers anymore but I couldn’t resist – this was purely for my personal amusement.

[HondaJunkie93]

Excellent chapter once again, I was wondering when Evan would make Andrew wear one. Can't wait for the next chapter. Hopefully Evan will further humiliate Andrew the next day.

[and090909]

Chapter 8
Andrew 8

As the door closed I sat there for a few minutes on the bed wearing just the diaper and soon realized I was starving. He told me not to take the diaper off but he didn’t say I couldn’t put something on over it, - so I went to the drawers where I had unpacked my suitcase and put on a pair of jeans and a large T shirt.

I grabbed the card from the slot, went downstairs, got into my car and drove to a nearby McDonalds. I went through the drive through and ordered a quarter pounder meal large with sprite and fries and a flurry. I could have gotten out of the car and ate there, because the diaper was pretty well hidden under my clothes but I didn’t want to take a chance and I was by myself anyway so I just brought it back to the hotel.

I went back upstairs and ate dinner. I was basically in for the night and it felt good to relax and think back on the day. I really wanted to take a shower but I knew I couldn’t take the diaper off so instead I stripped down to just the diaper and washed around it using a towel. I ordered a movie and started watching and after a little while I had to pee. I paused the movie and got up to go to the bathroom but soon remembered I had the diaper on. I just tried to forget I had to go and watched the rest of the movie but by the time it was ended all I could think of was peeing. I turned the TV and lights off and tried to go to sleep. After an hour of tossing and turning I was becoming really uncomfortable and getting a pain. I had no choice but to pee in the diaper. I decided to let it go but even as bad as I had to pee, I couldn’t bring myself to start it.

I wore diapers every night for almost 15 years but I was asleep when I peed – this was different. I relaxed concentrated on starting the flow and relieving my bladder and after another minute or two I started peeing. Once it started it came out easily. It felt so good to let it go, the pain and cramping went away almost instantly as I peed for what seemed like almost a minute.

The funny thing is I didn’t even feel that wet. I guess these diaper are really good at absorbing. I soon fell asleep.

I had not set up an alarm but woke up at about 7:00 AM. I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom but got back into bed when I realized that I was still diapered. I laid on my back, brought my knees up a bit, relaxed, waited, and started peeing. I must admit, it felt good letting it out and the feeling of it dripping inside the diaper. I closed my eyes and dozed back off for another hour.