The corrupted wish game.

[Bijou]

Granted. The remote appears in your ass.

I wish they would take the lounge games to make a show on netflix

[Runesmith]

Granted. It's called "Bijou bumbles through getDare." Three people watch it in total. Including you, the director, and LPV. It didn't get a second season.

I wish that LHC will announce evidence of supersymmetry on my birthday.

[Bijou]

Granted. The genie invites "the loonies" to celebrate with you.

I wish to be smarter than Runesmith.

[Wolf007]

Granted. The extra brain capacity that was required for this was taken from the area where your motor skills are situated. Now your IQ is even higher than Stephen Hawking's! On the downside...you drive around in the same brand of wheelchair like Hawking too. Don't worry it's also cheek-operated, so you can use the on-board computer to outsmart Runesmith!
Ohw, and although you can't physically laugh anymore, you'll still feel the excitement on the inside!



I wish Stephen Hawking could be cured from his disease...

[Runesmith]

Granted. Freed from the constraints of his wheelchair, Hawkings stands in front of the podium for his first lecture... and says, "fuck this" and walks away. He's last heard of in the back alleys of Bangkok, trying to "recapture his youth." The money starts running out soon, though. It was three weeks later that the world came face to face with the terrifying new evil genius, Dr Σ... yes, the one who held the UN to hostage and made off with 3 trillion in ransom money and a dozen Asian strippers in a Space X spacecraft to Mars. He is now known as King Stephanos (Στεφανος) of Mars.

I wish I could come up with a theory of quantum gravity without resorting to the ridiculous notion of asymptotic freedom.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but when you try to explain it everybody (including you, all humans and all animals and insects and spirits) dies due to asymtotic boredom

I wish more people liked my pink sheets

[Runesmith]

Granted. Everybody likes your pink sheets. When you come home, you find your roommate, her boyfriend, their girlfriend, her hairdresser, his dog groomer, the city dog catcher, the mayor, the homeless guy from the street corner, the cat lady from the apartment downstairs, the cable guy, the pizza girl, the used car salesman, his boss, his mistress, Batman, the piano tuner, town baker, his boyfriend, Tatsumaki bot, the tax consultant, founder of MySpace who currently lives under a bridge, Runesmith, the bitchy girl from high school who got pregnant at 17, the chief of police, the town drunk, the convicted pedophile, Amelia Earheart, three firefighters, the girl from Yandere simulator, the Manchester United football team, Analyn, the zookeeper, the colleague from work that you hate most, two burlesque dancers from Thailand, the sushi-platter girl, Donald Trump, the accordion player from the park, the so-called friend who called your bed a vagina because of the pink sheets, and the old man who plays chess in the cafe, all lying on your pink sheets and they just won't leave.

I wish that I could shoot lasers from my eyes whenever I wanted.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but you'd be a snail working in a circus, able to shoot lasers in a 2cm range, possibly chasing ants

I wish I could learn by my mistakes (and not wear sneakers again to go out in heavy rain)

[Runesmith]

Granted. Now you could learn from your mistakes. But unfortunately, you don't. Next time it pours down, you go outside in sneakers again. This time it's your favorite light blue sneakers with those cute tassels. Now they are brown. Live with it. Or maybe you should learn from your mistakes.

I wish I had some avocado ice cream in front of me right now.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, the pirates left you buried to the neck in the sand, with an avocado ice cream in front of your face... and the tide approaches...

I wish I could visit all of the world

[Sarge90]

Granted, your first stop is a boat trip in Somalia, followed by skinny dipping in Chernobyl, rounded off nicely with a trek across the Arctic in a land rover.... After hearing of your success, you are hired by none other than president trump himself to be his ambassador in Israel, where you can enjoy luxuries such as being universally hated by the entire populous and coughing up what's left of your spleen due to adverse effects of the radiation... Still, your thirst for adventure is slated and you will certainly be remembered in the history books.

I wish I never had to sleep and did not suffer cognitively nor physically from it.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but you'd be a worm living in a hippo's stomach

I wish I knew how to reopen a certain thread

[LPV]

Granted. Sea Flower's Denial Thread is now open.

I wish I could cum.

[Ana The Sniper]

Granted. You are now cumming live hornets and wasps.


I wish I had chinese food right now.

[SeaFlower]

Granted, but you're hanging upside down from the ceiling and your tongue barely reaches it

I wish I had a Chinese friend