SM Advice.

[Star Shadows]

ask for advice here: : I need help on a safety question but I'm not old enough to ask in Nelly's thread so I thought I would ask here.

I had to do a dare when I was supposed to stick something small up my pussy and leave it there overnight. I stuck a tiny flashlight thing (wasn't big at all) up there and 30 seconds later it completly dissappeared. What happened? Please help me!!!

Im going to keep this short as I have an exam in 30 minutes. First things first DONT PANIC. I know it may seem hard but there is a limited stretch it could have got to, so unless it fell out it wont have gone far as the cervix means it cant go beyond the vagina. If you use your longest finger to pole around you should be able to find it and retrieve it, using as many fingers as possible \required. It may be a tad uncomfortable or tricky to get to but if you stick at it it youll manage.

[Thoughtwrangler]

I had to do a dare when I was supposed to stick something small up my pussy and leave it there overnight. I stuck a tiny flashlight thing (wasn't big at all) up there and 30 seconds later it completly dissappeared. What happened? Please help me!!!

Ok, not having my own set of equipment I do not claim to be an expert on the female reproductive system. Having said that I do have a couple of thoughts to offer.

First, as above, don't panic. Panicking will likely just make it harder as the muscles at the opening of your pussy are likely to contract. Which is likely what happened in the first place sucking it in.

Secondly, follow StarShadow's advice to get it out. It's probably not too far in so you should be able to get it out with a little finesse and a cool head. Having said that, if you can't get it out leaving it in there is not a good idea. Go to your local emergency department if you need to. There are a staggering number of these sort of incidents so despite the embarrasment you might feel you're not alone and temporary embarrassment is much better than physical harm.

[Thoughtwrangler]

Okay, so I'm 20 years old, I've always had an interest in being submissive. i am not a fighter, and I've always been the one to back down. I recently aquired my first master, and I'm really excited about it. i want to please him any way he wants me to. i'm just a little shy? i'm also a bbw, so i've always been concious of my body. i just recently started getting in to showing it off. in the past i have been in relationships with a domme partner, but never like this. my master actually and I actually went to high school together. i just want to know the basic things that every new slave needs to know, because i do not want to displease him. when he smiles, it makes me the happiest slave in the world.

Well of course everyone is different but for mine, I love seeing my sub showing off her body and being confident around me. It might seem like a contradiction but even being submissive confidence is sexy.

Not breaking any rules is always a good start. Might sound simple but anytime a rule is broken it can be a bit disheartening. Also going beyond what is asked of you is a great thing to do. My sub loves to surprise me, she sent me her first picture of herself of her own volition. I was grinning like an idiot. Anytime she writes me a little story or poem or sends me a picture it makes me happy.

Also learning about his personal interests is good. As a generalisation Dom's/Domme's are a little self centred (I certainly am). I love being able to talk about my favourite video game and knowing that my pet at least has a basic understanding.

Those are the things I really like. Good luck.

[LadyCeleste]

I need help on a safety question but I'm not old enough to ask in Nelly's thread so I thought I would ask here.

I had to do a dare when I was supposed to stick something small up my pussy and leave it there overnight. I stuck a tiny flashlight thing (wasn't big at all) up there and 30 seconds later it completly dissappeared. What happened? Please help me!!!

Like everyone else has said before me, calm down, don't freak out and relax. It won't go up past the cervix so you won't have to worry about it going into the uterus.

If you just breathe, calm down and focus, using your index finger, feel around inside try to find it and slowly remove it. Insertion dares can be very dangerous and you need to be careful when doing them.

[LadyCeleste]

Okay, so I'm 20 years old, I've always had an interest in being submissive. i am not a fighter, and I've always been the one to back down. I recently aquired my first master, and I'm really excited about it. i want to please him any way he wants me to. i'm just a little shy? i'm also a bbw, so i've always been concious of my body. i just recently started getting in to showing it off. in the past i have been in relationships with a domme partner, but never like this. my master actually and I actually went to high school together. i just want to know the basic things that every new slave needs to know, because i do not want to displease him. when he smiles, it makes me the happiest slave in the world.

First thing I would suggest you do is learn terminology and do some research on the lifestyle first before jumping into it as quickly as you are. Secondly, once you've been able to handle that, get the ground rules and/or guidelines your Dom wants you to follow. Make sure that you discuss hard limits, soft limits, likes and dislikes. Also, please please PLEASE make sure everything is Safe AND Consensual.

Do not allow this Dom to bully you or treat you anything less than you are just because he's more dominant than you are. You have every right to say NO. It's perfectly acceptable. If he doesn't accept no for an answer for ANY reason, WALK AWAY. I cannot stress that enough. You do not need to stay in a relationship where your physical being is being threatened or your health is in danger.

[Star Shadows]

ask for advice here: : Hey guys! I'm the same person with that problem about the pussy insertion thing. Well, I found it. It is really deep in there. I can feel it but I just can't get it out. How do you propose I get it out?

As much as this isnt the answer that you want to hear the only help I can think of is suggesting you go to a doctor. As much as it is embarrassing they will get this sort of thing all the time. You can ask them to keep it confidential from your parents so they dont have to know and they cant sort it out for you in no time at all.

[LadyCeleste]

How do i get a master? even a short term one is better than none at all.

That's a great question. It all depends on what you are looking for. Here on gD, the easiest way is to post an ad. But before you do so, take a look at the Top Advertisements first. Most people, and I do mean most do not for whatever reason put any thought into their ads.

One liners are not sufficient. You need to outline your likes, dislikes, soft limits and hard limits. Be specific in what you want. Just putting "I want a master" is not going to get you anywhere.

Be selective. Don't just take the first person to post in your thread. When I was doing my search, I had very specific instructions and when they were not followed, I made sure to avoid those people.

Be safe. Don't do something that you are uncomfortable with doing just because you want to please your dom.

Trust. This is built up over time, you cannot expect to build this in a single session. Do not do anything you are not sure of.

Ask questions. It's okay to ask questions. If your dom says that you can't, walk away. That is not the type of dom you want to be with.

[Star Shadows]

How do i get a master? even a short term one is better than none at all.

There isnt really a lot I can add to what my companion Lady Celeste has already said, so instead I shall emphasise. As much as I can understand your ... sense of urgency? or deep desire to find a master/ dominant there is a lot to be said in regards to exercising caution. As with a lot of aspects of the internet people are not always who they claim to be, and situations are not always as they may appear. What Lady Celeste says is very true about selectivity, trust and safety but I would also like to add the importance of self respect. Respect your own body, safety and well being before you respect the authority of someone elses because I would hazard as to suggest that in respecting yourself you have a greater chance of journeying through this lifestyle safety.

As for finding a master, either use the ad section in the main forum, bdsm exchange chat room (rooms function when you get into chat allows you to find this) or general networking having had a look at what else is advertised. But do heed that it is not an instant process. Finding someone is often hard work. Stick at it and it will pay off.

Best of luck!

[Thoughtwrangler]

How do u start online?

Start with an ad in the M/s section. When you find someone you think might be compatible with take your time and ask lots of questions. (I refer to it as the interrogation) Don't send pictures or go on cam until you feel comfortable.

After that, just communicate a lot with your partner. Hope this helps.

[Star Shadows]

ask for advice here: : My Master has been working on streching me for the past 3 weeks. He has been keeping a wide object in me for this time. It's starting to come to the point it hurts to move. At the end of the second week I started begging for a break. I told him how much pain I was in and it started to hurt when I did anything really. What also is frustrating is how I am expected to still strech my pussy though it's to sore to work because it has had no break. Now it has started to make me feel a lot weaker and more difficult for me to do things in my everyday life. I have told him this but I feel like he is just ignoring me and doesn't care to realize. I have been considering on ending the relationship because of this, but I do feel bad because it's something I feel can be fixed him he realized actually realized it.

If he is showing such a blatant disregard for how this is making you feel, the pain its causing and the effects it is having then you have to leave him. Especially if it feels like he is ignoring you. You have tried to reason with him and tell, and beg him and if that isnt working he clearly isnt good for you. Especially when it hurts to move or do anything then you need to leave him and get whatever it is out of you. Seriously someone who shows that much disregard for your well being doest deserve to have you, or any other submissive / slave for that matter. For your own good just walk away.

[LadyCeleste]

What is the best way to find REALLY strict masters?

I suppose we should define that we are not here to help you find a master/mistress/play friend/fuck buddy or what have you. If you want a master you have to put in the work to find said master or mistress. You need to put up an advert. We've been saying this time and time again. You have to do the work to find someone decent.

[Star Shadows]

Ask for advice here: I need some self-bondage technique

This isn't really the purpose of this thread, however post a request for help in the "request tord online" or "request punishments / ideas" section and the inventive people of getDare should be able to help you with it. Alternatively there are a lot of good websites on the internet providing advice and suggestions of self bondage techniques. Make sure to be safe as you play and ultimately practice will be the cause of improvement.

[LadyCeleste]

I need some self-bondage technique

There's great resources all over the internet that can help you get started. You first want to determine if you want predicament bondage or if you just want regular self bondage. Once you've determined that, then you can go ahead and move forward with trying it out.

[Star Shadows]

I was wanting more information about journals that sub/slaves would do daily, weekly, etc. What would they write in them and keep track of? I've seen many different examples but I feel like I could use some more advice and on the subject of journal entries. Thank you

Well this really depends on what you want to know about your sub/ slave on a daily basis and it can vary from person to person. Typically, or typically in my experience at least, they would contain details of what the submissive has done in the day, of any tasks they have done if they were given, and their reactions to it. but it can also be used for them to convey their thoughts on an idea or answer questions. You can use them however you need to.

[Star Shadows]

My girlfriend cheated of sometime now cheated on me. We started off with M/s and it grew more than M/s and we stopped it when she did not think it was for her. After quite a lot of months she wanted it again. And it was hard for me to be her Dom again. And we started it again and I hated every minute of it, so I asked to stop it again and she went and cheated with some other guy she met few weeks ago. We both are now trying to work our way back but she is not ready to end all contact with him. I am confused if she still loves me. And if she does why does she still want to be friends with the other guy. Please help asap.

Im sorry for such a late reply to this, but for a while I read through it, re read it, and read it some more and i couldnt really come up with anything of value to say. But I think a large part of this issue really must come from the trust in the relationship being damaged, or at least this is how it seems to me. It seems like you want her to end contact with him because you dont trust her not to cheat again.

If you want my honest opinion then there are clearly trust and communication issues that you need to work out that are far more central to the direction and success of your relationship than her continuing communications with the other person.

Working back from this is hard and sometimes its impossible to trust them in the same light, but you have to be able to trust her not to do it again. Trust is something notoriously hard to repair once its broken especially if she is a repeat offender. Its something that needs rebuilding from the ground up and it takes time if its ever going to happen.

I can't help with your confusion unfortunately, her motives are entirely her own so it would be something you need to speak to with her. But I would suggest you try and deal with issues in communication and trust before you get caught up in other issues.