Exploring the Psychology of Masochism

Intubation · 09-01-2011, 03:31 PM

First off, I am a new member on the forum even though I have been reading posts for a very long time. I really admire the community that's set up here and wanted to get involved a bit.

[[caution: I have lots of questions.]]
I think that psychology is so interesting when it comes to masochism because that's a huge part of what it is. The only way we can see the relation between pain and pleasure is when we look at the hormones released when we feel pain and the rest is hidden in our brains somewhere. This thread is aimed at exploring the history of individual masochism and its nonsexual relativity. Let me give you a few questions to provoke some thoughts (feel free to go on about one topic if it sparks you--that's the point):

•What were the first signs that you were a masochist or felt inclined towards pain? Were they sexual in nature or accidental? Was it indirect (watching porn or thinking about it rather than experiencing it)?
•In your memory, were you a quiet and well-behaved child? If so, do you feel inclined to receive punishments? (I often find the two are related somehow... especially when spanking was used as a form of punishment as a child.)
•Do you find yourself inflicting emotional or psychological pain upon yourself? Let me give you an example. Do you find yourself thinking things that are untrue or painful in nature? Or, is your masochism restricted to physical pain?
•Do you find that masochists are naturally depressive? Why/why not? Are you personally?
•Do you find pain to be a way to release and express emotional stress, strain, pain, or other negative emotions?
•How does masochism free you? What does it free you of?
~Feel free to talk about other subtopics that can help explain your personal observations on why masochists are the way they are.~

Thanks for any input. Links are encouraged for further reading!

TensionRoom101 · 09-19-2011, 01:42 AM

In my experience, which is quite significant (I'm 45, been involved in the uk bdsm scene for a decade, and co-run a long standing fetish club), there are a disproportionate amount of selfharmers and former selfharmers among the submissive women (men to a much lesser extent).

It is my observation that a large number of masochists are indulging in self harm by proxy, so wherever possible I avoid playing with those submissives unless I've had a long conversation with them beforehand to ascertain where they're currently at emotionally.

A lot of submissives are or have been treated for depression, and many suffer from very low self esteem. I know that sounds like a statement from the Department of the Bleeding Obvious, but it is important to stop and consider that before reaching for the cane. Psychological imbalances can't be beaten out of someone, only beaten into someone, so care is to be taken. Doms, don't become part of the problem.

09-01-2011, 03:31 PM	#1
Intubation Junior Member Join Date: Sep 2011 Posts: 2	Exploring the Psychology of Masochism First off, I am a new member on the forum even though I have been reading posts for a very long time. I really admire the community that's set up here and wanted to get involved a bit. [[caution: I have lots of questions.]] I think that psychology is so interesting when it comes to masochism because that's a huge part of what it is. The only way we can see the relation between pain and pleasure is when we look at the hormones released when we feel pain and the rest is hidden in our brains somewhere. This thread is aimed at exploring the history of individual masochism and its nonsexual relativity. Let me give you a few questions to provoke some thoughts (feel free to go on about one topic if it sparks you--that's the point): •What were the first signs that you were a masochist or felt inclined towards pain? Were they sexual in nature or accidental? Was it indirect (watching porn or thinking about it rather than experiencing it)? •In your memory, were you a quiet and well-behaved child? If so, do you feel inclined to receive punishments? (I often find the two are related somehow... especially when spanking was used as a form of punishment as a child.) •Do you find yourself inflicting emotional or psychological pain upon yourself? Let me give you an example. Do you find yourself thinking things that are untrue or painful in nature? Or, is your masochism restricted to physical pain? •Do you find that masochists are naturally depressive? Why/why not? Are you personally? •Do you find pain to be a way to release and express emotional stress, strain, pain, or other negative emotions? •How does masochism free you? What does it free you of? ~Feel free to talk about other subtopics that can help explain your personal observations on why masochists are the way they are.~ Thanks for any input. Links are encouraged for further reading! Last edited by Intubation; 09-01-2011 at 03:40 PM.

09-19-2011, 01:42 AM	#2
TensionRoom101 Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 223	In my experience, which is quite significant (I'm 45, been involved in the uk bdsm scene for a decade, and co-run a long standing fetish club), there are a disproportionate amount of selfharmers and former selfharmers among the submissive women (men to a much lesser extent). It is my observation that a large number of masochists are indulging in self harm by proxy, so wherever possible I avoid playing with those submissives unless I've had a long conversation with them beforehand to ascertain where they're currently at emotionally. A lot of submissives are or have been treated for depression, and many suffer from very low self esteem. I know that sounds like a statement from the Department of the Bleeding Obvious, but it is important to stop and consider that before reaching for the cane. Psychological imbalances can't be beaten out of someone, only beaten into someone, so care is to be taken. Doms, don't become part of the problem. __________________ When even the wisest of young people can't see the consequences of their actions, it's time I called it a day.