Staying away from relationships but still needing to feel submissive.

Ninifia · 08-30-2021, 06:41 AM

Hi everyone, I'm new here and looking for some advice. I've come to the very hard decision recently that I'm in a space right now where I need to stay away from being in a D/s relationship or a romantic relationship in general. I really need to focus on myself and my health both mental and physical.

This is something I'm finding really hard as I still desperately need to feel submissive and am lost without the control. I wondered if anyone else has any advice or experience in this type of situation, and how I can incorporate my submissive side into my life without an actual Dominant. I know it sounds silly but I just don't want to start up a D/s relationship and not be able to give it my all and maybe even end up hurting a future partner or myself in the process. It just feels wrong so I'm looking for alternative solutions and just venting a little.

Thanks for reading.

GermanSir · 08-30-2021, 06:51 AM

Welcome on board.

This is a very difficult question to start with and I suppose there won´t be a general solution for that.
You might feel different about things someone else did in the same situation, as this is very specific for each indivdual.

What you can try to do is to set up rules for yourself, you would enjoy if given by a dominant. Maybe that helps a bit in feeling submissive, even when it is without actual control.
Other things could include finding someone as an occasional play partner without a real relationship, but it looks like you wouldn´t enjoy that.

What helps me personally is to be creative. Use the "desperation" to create something, like a drawing, a story, whatever you want. You can dive into the fantasy and maybe that helps a bit.

But in the end, whatever you decide for, your health is always the most important thing. So take care of that.

Ninifia · 08-30-2021, 08:04 AM

Hi GermanSir, thanks so much for taking the time to reply and for your input.

Making some rules for myself sounds a little silly but is actually a fun idea, the more I think about it the more I like the sound of it.

I'm also using creative outlets to help me deal with what's happened and I didn't think to incorporate that with my submissive side. You've given me some really helpful ideas, I really appreciate it.

herpderp42 · 08-30-2021, 10:58 AM

Hm, all the (dice) dares on here could be an unpersonal way of domination. I would also suggest you check out if webteases (milovana.com) are something for you.

08-30-2021, 06:41 AM	#1
Ninifia Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2021 Posts: 3	Staying away from relationships but still needing to feel submissive. Hi everyone, I'm new here and looking for some advice. I've come to the very hard decision recently that I'm in a space right now where I need to stay away from being in a D/s relationship or a romantic relationship in general. I really need to focus on myself and my health both mental and physical. This is something I'm finding really hard as I still desperately need to feel submissive and am lost without the control. I wondered if anyone else has any advice or experience in this type of situation, and how I can incorporate my submissive side into my life without an actual Dominant. I know it sounds silly but I just don't want to start up a D/s relationship and not be able to give it my all and maybe even end up hurting a future partner or myself in the process. It just feels wrong so I'm looking for alternative solutions and just venting a little. Thanks for reading.

08-30-2021, 06:51 AM	#2
GermanSir getDare Devil Join Date: Jun 2020 Location: Germany Posts: 1,309	Welcome on board. This is a very difficult question to start with and I suppose there won´t be a general solution for that. You might feel different about things someone else did in the same situation, as this is very specific for each indivdual. What you can try to do is to set up rules for yourself, you would enjoy if given by a dominant. Maybe that helps a bit in feeling submissive, even when it is without actual control. Other things could include finding someone as an occasional play partner without a real relationship, but it looks like you wouldn´t enjoy that. What helps me personally is to be creative. Use the "desperation" to create something, like a drawing, a story, whatever you want. You can dive into the fantasy and maybe that helps a bit. But in the end, whatever you decide for, your health is always the most important thing. So take care of that. __________________ Some likes: Bondage, gags, Humiliation, Nipple play, orgasm control, forced orgasm spankings, (hidden) public

08-30-2021, 10:58 AM	#4
herpderp42 getDare Addict Join Date: Jul 2015 Location: Germany Posts: 2,485 Blog Entries: 10	Hm, all the (dice) dares on here could be an unpersonal way of domination. I would also suggest you check out if webteases (milovana.com) are something for you. __________________ Looking for a female sub

08-30-2021, 08:04 AM	#3
Ninifia Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2021 Posts: 3	Hi GermanSir, thanks so much for taking the time to reply and for your input. Making some rules for myself sounds a little silly but is actually a fun idea, the more I think about it the more I like the sound of it. I'm also using creative outlets to help me deal with what's happened and I didn't think to incorporate that with my submissive side. You've given me some really helpful ideas, I really appreciate it.