Fiction: Little Did She Know

I_Am_Alex · 07-10-2013, 09:34 PM

Chapter 1

The breeze brushed by her foot making the young woman jump out of her skin. Lost. Alone. Cowering through the woods in the third hour after midnight. She looked all around, and flinched at every noise. The owls' hoot producing goosebumps by the dozen. The crack of twigs sending a shiver down her spine. Jennifer was anything if not brave, yet she couldn't help but cringe in fear. She was supposed to just be visiting her parents for Christmas, something she hadn't done since she was 19. But, forgetting to fill up her tank, Jennifer's car stopped dead. The long pause after the car's engine ceased and Jennifer's decision to walk to the gas station a few miles back was long. But now the walk is even longer. The shadows creep and follow her on her long path to the station. Jennifer halts her movement. five yards in front of her a black cat walks across the road.

"Meow" The cat's shockingly rude sound directed at Jennifer.
"Shoo! Get away!" She waved her arms forcing the cat to leave her presence. Jennifer isn't superstitious, but seeing that cat pushed her fear over the edge until she broke out into an uncontrollable torrent of tears. Falling to the ground, her knees scraping against the rough pavement, Jennifer just balled for what seemed like days.

"You OK there perrty lady?" A man's voice broke the night. Jennifer looked up, forgetting that she didn't know the man or the fact that he had no car in sight she ran to him and locked in an embrace.

"*sniff* *sniff* m...my c...car ran outta gas a...and there was this cat a...*sniff* and it *waah*" Jennifer sobbed.

"Now don't worry missus I own the farmland up here. There is a barn just a few minutes walk from here why don't you come with me." The man offered. Without speaking Jennifer just wiped her nose and nodded and the went off on their way.

If Jennifer was familiar with the area then she would have known that in the past five years three young women between the ages of 18 and 26 have been kidnapped. Only was has escaped claiming that she was held in a barn, tortured and raped.They never caught the suspect.

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OK so my first story tell me what you think. It is by no means done I will update it every week or so but i would love to hear the comments and feedback. I'm going for a horror type feel to it and you can kinda guess whats coming. I like the third person story telling giving it a broader more open, and descriptive look at the story. So tell me what you liked (or didn't) and I will probably get the next chapter up in a week or so.

jenny r · 07-11-2013, 12:44 AM

I like it so far but with the next chapter try and make it a bit longer.

07-10-2013, 09:34 PM	#1
I_Am_Alex Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: USA Posts: 8	Little Did She Know Chapter 1 The breeze brushed by her foot making the young woman jump out of her skin. Lost. Alone. Cowering through the woods in the third hour after midnight. She looked all around, and flinched at every noise. The owls' hoot producing goosebumps by the dozen. The crack of twigs sending a shiver down her spine. Jennifer was anything if not brave, yet she couldn't help but cringe in fear. She was supposed to just be visiting her parents for Christmas, something she hadn't done since she was 19. But, forgetting to fill up her tank, Jennifer's car stopped dead. The long pause after the car's engine ceased and Jennifer's decision to walk to the gas station a few miles back was long. But now the walk is even longer. The shadows creep and follow her on her long path to the station. Jennifer halts her movement. five yards in front of her a black cat walks across the road. "Meow" The cat's shockingly rude sound directed at Jennifer. "Shoo! Get away!" She waved her arms forcing the cat to leave her presence. Jennifer isn't superstitious, but seeing that cat pushed her fear over the edge until she broke out into an uncontrollable torrent of tears. Falling to the ground, her knees scraping against the rough pavement, Jennifer just balled for what seemed like days. "You OK there perrty lady?" A man's voice broke the night. Jennifer looked up, forgetting that she didn't know the man or the fact that he had no car in sight she ran to him and locked in an embrace. "sniff sniff m...my c...car ran outta gas a...and there was this cat a...sniff and it waah" Jennifer sobbed. "Now don't worry missus I own the farmland up here. There is a barn just a few minutes walk from here why don't you come with me." The man offered. Without speaking Jennifer just wiped her nose and nodded and the went off on their way. If Jennifer was familiar with the area then she would have known that in the past five years three young women between the ages of 18 and 26 have been kidnapped. Only was has escaped claiming that she was held in a barn, tortured and raped.They never caught the suspect. __________________________________ OK so my first story tell me what you think. It is by no means done I will update it every week or so but i would love to hear the comments and feedback. I'm going for a horror type feel to it and you can kinda guess whats coming. I like the third person story telling giving it a broader more open, and descriptive look at the story. So tell me what you liked (or didn't) and I will probably get the next chapter up in a week or so. __________________ 18 Male Straight...ish Likes:Light Anal, Piss, x dress Dislikes:Public, A little pain, puppy play, poop Limits:Family, a lot of pain, Filthy Piglet in Male Farm Every Time I get a PM I must finger my ass while i open and read it Little Did She Know(Fiction):http://www.getdare.com/bbs/showthrea...99#post1021299

07-11-2013, 12:44 AM	#2
jenny r Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: Australia Posts: 34	I like it so far but with the next chapter try and make it a bit longer. __________________ Wanted female sub slave any age for long term relationship by email or Skype. Email me and tell me about yourself. email [email protected]