Fiction: Winter Break (MxM)

Aethi · 10-28-2011, 06:50 PM

To start off, I want to warn everyone: I've tried and failed at a story, and I'm far from the best writer. However, I've decided to give it a try. It'll have some sexual elements in it, and of course the all-important truth or dare. I'd love feedback, as well. Though be nice. >.>

---

Preface

It was the last day before winter break. It was that wonderful day when everything at school – end of the term exams, teachers, assignments, projects, waking up early – didn't matter. Even before the final bell had rung, it was still nigh impossible to get the students to calm down. People joked and didn’t pay attention to the teacher, who had already given up at trying to actually teach the students anything.

As students started to exit the building, they felt the cool air rush upon them. The grass was frozen and the sky was cloudy. It wasn’t supposed to snow that night, but some doubted it. The clouds had that menacing feel to it. The clouds were blocking the sun; the trees were swaying slightly from the wind.

One of the students looked up at the sky, and a reminiscent look appeared on his visage. His thoughts were drawn away from the cold and dark Connecticut and back to where he grew up, on the coast of Florida. His mind flashed to that time when the tropical storm was coming. He shivered and started to walk home. Their school system didn’t have buses anymore.

The students laughed and joked and made plans to get together. Some sophomores were heading onto cars, but most were walking too. The Juniors and Seniors had their own parking lot, and the teachers one as well. Some people were staying after school for their own reasons, and others were starting to gather.

The lone boy who had been staring at the sky, waiting for the storm to come was walking down a paved path. His petite features looked even stranger on this day; the cold weather had forced him to bulk on up his clothing. He thought no one was paying attention to him. Not that he disliked attention, of course. His day was finally ending, though, and he needed the rest. His exams were never easy.

A red sedan stopped by the side of the road where the boy was standing. The window rolled down, and he saw a familiar face. His thoughts were lifted as the new boy called out to him.

“Kyle!” the boy in the car exclaimed. “Want a ride?”

A grin appeared on Kyle’s face and he responded with a quick, “Yeah, thanks.”

Saphir · 10-28-2011, 08:14 PM

Hey Aethi,

In my opinion you're actually a quite good writer. I really love your (dreamy?) descriptiveness, it's awesome to read. I had some problems with vocabulary, which is actually good because then I even learn some new words.

I would really love to read more and I'm looking forward to your next chapter.

nigh... is it because of some dialect (if so which?) or do you know it from reading archaic English or how come you use that... because I've never seen this one before and my dictionary said it's kinda archaic/dialect. (Which seems kinda weird because usually something is either archaic or it is dialect...but both...

)

Yeah however...
have a nice day

Aethi · 10-28-2011, 08:24 PM

Oh, thanks! Night I actually knew from the phrase "'twas nigh impossible", and I just kind of figured it out from context after that. Thanks for the description. I was -actually- inspired to write this from an old, old thread that I've already lost. Anyway, I'll be adding some more later on (obviously :P). I hope everyone here will like it.

Saphir · 10-28-2011, 08:30 PM

Ah okay, thank you for the info

And yeah, I'm looking forward to the next chap :3 (I mentioned earlier... didn't I?

whatever...^^)

Abmp · 10-29-2011, 06:17 AM

Great start. If your other story was nearly as good as this then I mus read it.
Can't wait for an update.

Aethi · 10-29-2011, 08:57 PM

Hah, it wasn't. I'll try and get an update up by tomorrow. I'll also get a number system in so we can have real chapters. I can't make any promises though - I'm a bit tired tonight and I don't write well in the day. :P

Edit: I made a few changes to the story (nothing significant whatsoever) just to make it more sensible.

Edit2: Oh, and I must give my inspiration away for my writing tone. xD It's "Winter" by Antonio Vivaldi (a song). It set the mood for me. :P

10-28-2011, 06:50 PM	#1
Aethi getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Indiana, USA Posts: 255 Blog Entries: 1	Winter Break (MxM) To start off, I want to warn everyone: I've tried and failed at a story, and I'm far from the best writer. However, I've decided to give it a try. It'll have some sexual elements in it, and of course the all-important truth or dare. I'd love feedback, as well. Though be nice. >.> --- Preface It was the last day before winter break. It was that wonderful day when everything at school – end of the term exams, teachers, assignments, projects, waking up early – didn't matter. Even before the final bell had rung, it was still nigh impossible to get the students to calm down. People joked and didn’t pay attention to the teacher, who had already given up at trying to actually teach the students anything. As students started to exit the building, they felt the cool air rush upon them. The grass was frozen and the sky was cloudy. It wasn’t supposed to snow that night, but some doubted it. The clouds had that menacing feel to it. The clouds were blocking the sun; the trees were swaying slightly from the wind. One of the students looked up at the sky, and a reminiscent look appeared on his visage. His thoughts were drawn away from the cold and dark Connecticut and back to where he grew up, on the coast of Florida. His mind flashed to that time when the tropical storm was coming. He shivered and started to walk home. Their school system didn’t have buses anymore. The students laughed and joked and made plans to get together. Some sophomores were heading onto cars, but most were walking too. The Juniors and Seniors had their own parking lot, and the teachers one as well. Some people were staying after school for their own reasons, and others were starting to gather. The lone boy who had been staring at the sky, waiting for the storm to come was walking down a paved path. His petite features looked even stranger on this day; the cold weather had forced him to bulk on up his clothing. He thought no one was paying attention to him. Not that he disliked attention, of course. His day was finally ending, though, and he needed the rest. His exams were never easy. A red sedan stopped by the side of the road where the boy was standing. The window rolled down, and he saw a familiar face. His thoughts were lifted as the new boy called out to him. “Kyle!” the boy in the car exclaimed. “Want a ride?” A grin appeared on Kyle’s face and he responded with a quick, “Yeah, thanks.” __________________ M/22/Gay LIKES: Clothing (not xdress) \| Video Game Dares \| Shower Dares \| Sleeping Dares DISLIKES: Messy \| Piss \| Outside/semi-public LIMITS: Involving other people \| Scat \| \| Crossdressing \| Blood \| Etc. Last edited by Aethi; 10-29-2011 at 08:59 PM.

10-28-2011, 08:24 PM	#3
Aethi getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Indiana, USA Posts: 255 Blog Entries: 1	Oh, thanks! Night I actually knew from the phrase "'twas nigh impossible", and I just kind of figured it out from context after that. Thanks for the description. I was -actually- inspired to write this from an old, old thread that I've already lost. Anyway, I'll be adding some more later on (obviously :P). I hope everyone here will like it. __________________ M/22/Gay LIKES: Clothing (not xdress) \| Video Game Dares \| Shower Dares \| Sleeping Dares DISLIKES: Messy \| Piss \| Outside/semi-public LIMITS: Involving other people \| Scat \| \| Crossdressing \| Blood \| Etc.

10-29-2011, 06:17 AM	#5
Abmp Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Posts: 125	Great start. If your other story was nearly as good as this then I mus read it. Can't wait for an update. __________________ Likes: masturbation, very mild pain, Internet, Dislikes: pee, poo, family This is a basic likes and dislikes, I will try somethings just ask

10-29-2011, 08:57 PM	#6
Aethi getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Indiana, USA Posts: 255 Blog Entries: 1	Hah, it wasn't. I'll try and get an update up by tomorrow. I'll also get a number system in so we can have real chapters. I can't make any promises though - I'm a bit tired tonight and I don't write well in the day. :P Edit: I made a few changes to the story (nothing significant whatsoever) just to make it more sensible. Edit2: Oh, and I must give my inspiration away for my writing tone. xD It's "Winter" by Antonio Vivaldi (a song). It set the mood for me. :P __________________ M/22/Gay LIKES: Clothing (not xdress) \| Video Game Dares \| Shower Dares \| Sleeping Dares DISLIKES: Messy \| Piss \| Outside/semi-public LIMITS: Involving other people \| Scat \| \| Crossdressing \| Blood \| Etc. Last edited by Aethi; 10-29-2011 at 09:01 PM.

10-28-2011, 08:14 PM	#2
Saphir getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 425	Hey Aethi, In my opinion you're actually a quite good writer. I really love your (dreamy?) descriptiveness, it's awesome to read. I had some problems with vocabulary, which is actually good because then I even learn some new words. I would really love to read more and I'm looking forward to your next chapter. nigh... is it because of some dialect (if so which?) or do you know it from reading archaic English or how come you use that... because I've never seen this one before and my dictionary said it's kinda archaic/dialect. (Which seems kinda weird because usually something is either archaic or it is dialect...but both... ) Yeah however... have a nice day

10-28-2011, 08:30 PM	#4
Saphir getDare Sweetheart Join Date: Dec 2010 Posts: 425	Ah okay, thank you for the info And yeah, I'm looking forward to the next chap :3 (I mentioned earlier... didn't I? whatever...^^)