Roses are Red [Fiction]

VagueLittleSex · 02-14-2009, 08:09 PM

This is my first story. Critique is much appriciated, but please dont just post 'This story is great' or 'This story is horrible'. Give more insight!

-------------------------------------------

I couldn't believe it! I was so excited. I had found the perfect mistress about 2 years ago when I was seventeen, I was planning on keeping it just online, but I got more and more indulged. We had met, briefly, once, but now... now she wanted me to come visit her for a week and see if we can manage a living slave and mistress relationship. Oh, right, I have to reply.

I read the message again.

MissKatie: Slave, you will visit me for a week. July 1- July 8.

Jaci: Yes mistress, of course Mistress!

MissKatie: You will bring the following: your toothbrush, a comb, and a cell phone. That is all. You will wear a tube top and a mini skirt, no panties or bra, to the air port. Understood?

Jaci: Yes Mistress! May I ask a question?

MissKatie: Yes.

Jaci: Am I to buy the plane ticket?

MissKatie: No. I will provide that. But be at the airport at 9:00 in 2 days. Now perform your nightly duties and go to sleep.

Jaci: Yes Mistress, Good night Mistress.

I got off the computer and went to the shower. I had to take cold showers now. No masturbating tonight either, I reminded myself. Mistress tells me when to masturbate. I must not forget. But oh I was so excited. I let my fingers wander towards my vagina opening and rubbed it slowly. 'Stop!' I mentally screamed to myself. I knew all to well the punishments that would be given if I did that. I got out of the shower and dried off. I went to bed.

In the morning an email from Mistress Katie was waiting.

To: Jaci
From: Miss Katie

Pack today. I won't be online today but you must complete these tasks:
1. Go shopping and flash 3 old men, 2 teenage girls, and 1 mother.
2. On the bus, find a boy around 18 and give him a blow job.
3. Buy me a present. I like being surprised.

Miss Katie

Gosh... I have to buy her a present! What should I get her? I was flustered. The other tasks would be slightly easy but that one worried me. What if she didn't like it? Would I be punished? I was worried.

Since I had moved out of my parents house my submittion level had gone up quite a number. I lived in a cheap apartment. I had long mousy brown hair and a slender body and B-cup boobs. I thought I looked good. And apparently so did quite a few guys. I laughed. I was a lesbian, Mistress knew it, but she has tried my sexuality multiple times.
Mistress... She was beautiful. She had long auburn hair that was almost the percise color of a rose. She was curvy with what I am guessing are C-Cup breasts and a luminous body that I memorized the first time I saw her.
She was my dom... and my love.

---------------------------------------------------------------------
I will post more soon If people like it. I promise.

cheesey923 · 02-14-2009, 08:26 PM

i believe i has the makings of a good story just try posting a bit longer but all in all a wonderful start

Smile · 02-14-2009, 08:33 PM

Be proud... i quite enjoyed reading that, and thats comeing from someone who's not in a reading mood today, il read the next few parts and then comment more on it

but good work so far

VagueLittleSex · 02-14-2009, 08:55 PM

I got up from the computer and went to get dressed. I selected a red spaghetti-strap shirt and a little demin mini skirt that would make my tasks easy. I grabbed my purse and headed out the door.
The whole time I was think about what to get my Mistress.
A necklace? No, not right. A whip? No She probably has enough of them.
I finally decided just to look when I get to the mall.
I waited at the bus stop till it got there and stepped on. I looked around to see if I could find any suitable canidate for my second task. There was one. He was probably 18 or 19 with shaggy, brown hair. I stepped over to him.
"Hey, do you want a blow job?" I asked him. He seemed surprised.
"Sure... Where?" He asked looking me up and down. He ran his hand along my arse.
"At the mall." I said as we finally pulled in.
The guy and me got off and went into the mall. We found a reasonably empty bathroom and got to work.
I pulled out his shaft and ran my hands up and down it. I placed my lips on the tip and slid it in slowly. I didn't put it in too far the first time. Next I brought it in deeper, rubbing my tongue up and down it. By now he had started whimpering and moaning softly, he closed his eyes as he pushed it in deeper. I ran my fingers around the area near is cock teasing slightly. I hated giving blow jobs. I just wanted it over as fast as I could.
Finally, he exploded in me. I swallowed as I stood up. He smiled at me.
"Want me to return the favor?" He asked, winking.
"Sorry I'm a lesbian!" I said before walking out of the bathroom, the awful taste still in my mouth.
I saw 2 teenage girls standing by a clothing shop. I shouted to them. They turned around just as I pulled my top up. Their eyes widened in surprise as I pulled my top down and walked away.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry it is so short but I have to get off.

cheesey923 · 02-15-2009, 12:09 AM

cool installment keep going

Officelover · 02-15-2009, 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VagueLittleSex

Gosh... I have to buy her a present!

I liked this story except for this one sentence.

VagueLittleSex · 02-15-2009, 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Officelover

I liked this story except for this one sentence.

Why this sentence?

pokermaniac1122 · 02-15-2009, 05:26 PM

write more please!

Officelover · 02-15-2009, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VagueLittleSex

Why this sentence?

I mean... "Gosh" "I have to buy her a present"

Why don't you just go ahead and say, "Gee Wilacers, I have to get her a present" and then go watch Howdy Duty time. It's a minor complant actually.

Smile · 02-15-2009, 07:05 PM

i like this, but yes, the gosh.. i have to buy her a present does sound abit famous 5. well, they would say oh golly gosh, i have to buy her a present, but even still

it rushed a bit with the blowjob, not so much the blowjob its self but the jump between "hey, do you want a blowjob?" and getting to the mall, i am sure they could have had an interesting conversation during the bust ride

other than that good *thumbs up* looking forward for more

Officelover · 02-15-2009, 07:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VagueLittleSex

I got up from the computer and went to get dressed. I selected a red spaghetti-strap shirt and a little demin mini skirt that would make my tasks easy. I grabbed my purse and headed out the door.
The whole time I was think about what to get my Mistress.
A necklace? No, not right. A whip? No She probably has enough of them.
I finally decided just to look when I get to the mall.
I waited at the bus stop till it got there and stepped on. I looked around to see if I could find any suitable canidate for my second task. There was one. He was probably 18 or 19 with shaggy, brown hair. I stepped over to him.
"Hey, do you want a blow job?" I asked him. He seemed surprised.
"Sure... Where?" He asked looking me up and down. He ran his hand along my arse.
"At the mall." I said as we finally pulled in.
The guy and me got off and went into the mall. We found a reasonably empty bathroom and got to work.
I pulled out his shaft and ran my hands up and down it. I placed my lips on the tip and slid it in slowly. I didn't put it in too far the first time. Next I brought it in deeper, rubbing my tongue up and down it. By now he had started whimpering and moaning softly, he closed his eyes as he pushed it in deeper. I ran my fingers around the area near is cock teasing slightly. I hated giving blow jobs. I just wanted it over as fast as I could.
Finally, he exploded in me. I swallowed as I stood up. He smiled at me.
"Want me to return the favor?" He asked, winking.
"Sorry I'm a lesbian!" I said before walking out of the bathroom, the awful taste still in my mouth.
I saw 2 teenage girls standing by a clothing shop. I shouted to them. They turned around just as I pulled my top up. Their eyes widened in surprise as I pulled my top down and walked away.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry it is so short but I have to get off.

I'm sorry, I didn't see that. WHAT THE HELL?

Smile · 02-15-2009, 07:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Officelover

I'm sorry, I didn't see that. WHAT THE HELL?

how did you miss it?

Officelover · 02-15-2009, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by videotape

how did you miss it?

I don't know, I was too focused on 'Gosh, I have to get her a present.'

VagueLittleSex · 02-16-2009, 01:19 PM

Sorry people.
I wont continue the story
I just dont have time to post...
Sorry

cheesey923 · 02-16-2009, 11:56 PM

you have to continue the story plz its very good plz keep going

02-14-2009, 08:09 PM	#1
VagueLittleSex Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5	Roses are Red [Fiction] This is my first story. Critique is much appriciated, but please dont just post 'This story is great' or 'This story is horrible'. Give more insight! ------------------------------------------- I couldn't believe it! I was so excited. I had found the perfect mistress about 2 years ago when I was seventeen, I was planning on keeping it just online, but I got more and more indulged. We had met, briefly, once, but now... now she wanted me to come visit her for a week and see if we can manage a living slave and mistress relationship. Oh, right, I have to reply. I read the message again. MissKatie: Slave, you will visit me for a week. July 1- July 8. Jaci: Yes mistress, of course Mistress! MissKatie: You will bring the following: your toothbrush, a comb, and a cell phone. That is all. You will wear a tube top and a mini skirt, no panties or bra, to the air port. Understood? Jaci: Yes Mistress! May I ask a question? MissKatie: Yes. Jaci: Am I to buy the plane ticket? MissKatie: No. I will provide that. But be at the airport at 9:00 in 2 days. Now perform your nightly duties and go to sleep. Jaci: Yes Mistress, Good night Mistress. I got off the computer and went to the shower. I had to take cold showers now. No masturbating tonight either, I reminded myself. Mistress tells me when to masturbate. I must not forget. But oh I was so excited. I let my fingers wander towards my vagina opening and rubbed it slowly. 'Stop!' I mentally screamed to myself. I knew all to well the punishments that would be given if I did that. I got out of the shower and dried off. I went to bed. In the morning an email from Mistress Katie was waiting. To: Jaci From: Miss Katie Pack today. I won't be online today but you must complete these tasks: 1. Go shopping and flash 3 old men, 2 teenage girls, and 1 mother. 2. On the bus, find a boy around 18 and give him a blow job. 3. Buy me a present. I like being surprised. Miss Katie Gosh... I have to buy her a present! What should I get her? I was flustered. The other tasks would be slightly easy but that one worried me. What if she didn't like it? Would I be punished? I was worried. Since I had moved out of my parents house my submittion level had gone up quite a number. I lived in a cheap apartment. I had long mousy brown hair and a slender body and B-cup boobs. I thought I looked good. And apparently so did quite a few guys. I laughed. I was a lesbian, Mistress knew it, but she has tried my sexuality multiple times. Mistress... She was beautiful. She had long auburn hair that was almost the percise color of a rose. She was curvy with what I am guessing are C-Cup breasts and a luminous body that I memorized the first time I saw her. She was my dom... and my love. --------------------------------------------------------------------- I will post more soon If people like it. I promise. Last edited by VagueLittleSex; 02-14-2009 at 08:13 PM.

02-14-2009, 08:26 PM	#2
cheesey923 Distinguished Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 539 Blog Entries: 2	i believe i has the makings of a good story just try posting a bit longer but all in all a wonderful start __________________ it aint easy being cheesey Revamped with a new outlook on this website! Loves: cross dressing, wedgies, anal, oral, bi, feminization, sissy, cum eating. Likes: anything that's not in my limits. Open to just about anything. Limits. Extreme public(guaranteed caught by people I know) blood, scat. Hoping to stay around for awhile now.

02-14-2009, 08:33 PM	#3
Smile Account Banned Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: "I just don't give a fuck" Posts: 1,402 Blog Entries: 6	Be proud... i quite enjoyed reading that, and thats comeing from someone who's not in a reading mood today, il read the next few parts and then comment more on it but good work so far __________________ 4 Days Left. Note: If I use "" it is meant to be as a dazed daydream look, not an insult.

02-15-2009, 12:09 AM	#5
cheesey923 Distinguished Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 539 Blog Entries: 2	cool installment keep going __________________ it aint easy being cheesey Revamped with a new outlook on this website! Loves: cross dressing, wedgies, anal, oral, bi, feminization, sissy, cum eating. Likes: anything that's not in my limits. Open to just about anything. Limits. Extreme public(guaranteed caught by people I know) blood, scat. Hoping to stay around for awhile now.

02-15-2009, 07:05 PM	#10
Smile Account Banned Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: "I just don't give a fuck" Posts: 1,402 Blog Entries: 6	i like this, but yes, the gosh.. i have to buy her a present does sound abit famous 5. well, they would say oh golly gosh, i have to buy her a present, but even still it rushed a bit with the blowjob, not so much the blowjob its self but the jump between "hey, do you want a blowjob?" and getting to the mall, i am sure they could have had an interesting conversation during the bust ride other than that good thumbs up looking forward for more __________________ 4 Days Left. Note: If I use "" it is meant to be as a dazed daydream look, not an insult.

02-14-2009, 08:55 PM	#4
VagueLittleSex Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5	I got up from the computer and went to get dressed. I selected a red spaghetti-strap shirt and a little demin mini skirt that would make my tasks easy. I grabbed my purse and headed out the door. The whole time I was think about what to get my Mistress. A necklace? No, not right. A whip? No She probably has enough of them. I finally decided just to look when I get to the mall. I waited at the bus stop till it got there and stepped on. I looked around to see if I could find any suitable canidate for my second task. There was one. He was probably 18 or 19 with shaggy, brown hair. I stepped over to him. "Hey, do you want a blow job?" I asked him. He seemed surprised. "Sure... Where?" He asked looking me up and down. He ran his hand along my arse. "At the mall." I said as we finally pulled in. The guy and me got off and went into the mall. We found a reasonably empty bathroom and got to work. I pulled out his shaft and ran my hands up and down it. I placed my lips on the tip and slid it in slowly. I didn't put it in too far the first time. Next I brought it in deeper, rubbing my tongue up and down it. By now he had started whimpering and moaning softly, he closed his eyes as he pushed it in deeper. I ran my fingers around the area near is cock teasing slightly. I hated giving blow jobs. I just wanted it over as fast as I could. Finally, he exploded in me. I swallowed as I stood up. He smiled at me. "Want me to return the favor?" He asked, winking. "Sorry I'm a lesbian!" I said before walking out of the bathroom, the awful taste still in my mouth. I saw 2 teenage girls standing by a clothing shop. I shouted to them. They turned around just as I pulled my top up. Their eyes widened in surprise as I pulled my top down and walked away. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Sorry it is so short but I have to get off.

02-15-2009, 05:26 PM	#8
pokermaniac1122 Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 52	write more please!

02-16-2009, 01:19 PM	#14
VagueLittleSex Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 5	Sorry people. I wont continue the story I just dont have time to post... Sorry

02-16-2009, 11:56 PM	#15
cheesey923 Distinguished Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 539 Blog Entries: 2	you have to continue the story plz its very good plz keep going __________________ it aint easy being cheesey Revamped with a new outlook on this website! Loves: cross dressing, wedgies, anal, oral, bi, feminization, sissy, cum eating. Likes: anything that's not in my limits. Open to just about anything. Limits. Extreme public(guaranteed caught by people I know) blood, scat. Hoping to stay around for awhile now.