Musician Masturbation Roulette

[Jenny Girl]

Ever feel like masturbating but just can't figure out something to get off to? Worry no more as the Musician Masturbation Roulette is here to help!

First, use Random.org to pick six different numbers between 1 and 100. If you get a number twice, re-roll.

Next, head to the Billboard Hot 100 and find out which artist corresponds with each number. It is fine if an artist is repeated, just be sure to note that you got them more than once. If there are multiple artists credited to the song, write down the first one featured. If the artist is underage, re-roll.

Now, go ahead and assign each artist to a number between one and six. Then, you guessed it, it's time to roll a die. Whichever number you roll is who you will be masturbating to.

However, what type of media will you pleasure yourself to? Roll a die, and find media that corresponds to your roll based on the following:

1) An official promotional image of the artist
2) The music video for the song you rolled
3) A live performance by the artist
4) A music video for a different song by the artist
5) An interview with the artist
6) You pick!

Remember, the Musician Masturbation Roulette does not take into account sexual orientation or taste, so you're stuck with whomever you land on! If you just can't do it, then make sure you at least get properly punished for your failure.

Enjoy tuning your instruments everyone!