Here's a question...

[Pixiexo]

Originally Posted by Merlin

i think the point is "we" speak of many different things here:

Rolplay punishment: No real punishment more a roleplay thing that has the theme of punishment. Like every roleplay this is a mater of likes speaking nothing against it. I think the point here is just both need to be aware that it is roleplay

Funishment: "you have been a naughty girl" kind of thing. i mean out of pure fun. normally also things that are fun for the slave or at maximum neutral. can even go up to he point of absurdity and, unlike a real punishment, can even function as encouragement. Also here is the danger to mix it up and send false signals, so also here, like with the roleplay, it should be clear that it is not for a bad behavior or can really cause totally mixed feelings and confusion

Sadistic/mindfuck: i talk here of setting up failure, by unsolvable tasks or changing rules mid-task. Producing extreme mental stress for the slave, possible increased by mental degradation. This is sure edge-play... and should be handled appropriate. This needs to be seriously talked about! And both need to really be aware of the risks it involves before you consider it,. A Master or slave who see this extreme version as natural given should really start to think a bit about what they are saying...

Hmm "Because i can"... while i see this also sure a thing you can do and for some it works fine, especially out of a sadistic viewpoint, I still have hard times with it. First because i don't see why to call it a punishment and second because it has always a kind of a sign of weakness connected to it. If i need to rely on fear and punishments to feel in control and aware of my place it often shows just the opposite... how weak my position already is. As i said there are exceptions but in general i see it is often as a sign of fear on the masters side...

And of course there is also the version of letting the slave do things he hates just because the Master likes them, some even likes the fact that the slave hates them (kind of mild sadism). While you now can call that punishment, what some do, i feel this is misleading.
It is a task that the slave hates and is doing for her master anyway because the slave wants to please him (and not out of fear of a punishment). I think i not to long ago started to fully understand the dynamic behind it and in some way i start to see it as the sign for a deep commitment... To call such an act punishment is in my eyes sure misleading in any ways... but anyone their own.

Merlin has a point,

I really love funishment but hate accually being punished for somthing i had done wrong

[Night-1991]

Originally Posted by Merlin

i think the point is "we" speak of many different things here:

Rolplay punishment: No real punishment more a roleplay thing that has the theme of punishment. Like every roleplay this is a mater of likes speaking nothing against it. I think the point here is just both need to be aware that it is roleplay

Funishment: "you have been a naughty girl" kind of thing. i mean out of pure fun. normally also things that are fun for the slave or at maximum neutral. can even go up to he point of absurdity and, unlike a real punishment, can even function as encouragement. Also here is the danger to mix it up and send false signals, so also here, like with the roleplay, it should be clear that it is not for a bad behavior or can really cause totally mixed feelings and confusion

Sadistic/mindfuck: i talk here of setting up failure, by unsolvable tasks or changing rules mid-task. Producing extreme mental stress for the slave, possible increased by mental degradation. This is sure edge-play... and should be handled appropriate. This needs to be seriously talked about! And both need to really be aware of the risks it involves before you consider it,. A Master or slave who see this extreme version as natural given should really start to think a bit about what they are saying...

Hmm "Because i can"... while i see this also sure a thing you can do and for some it works fine, especially out of a sadistic viewpoint, I still have hard times with it. First because i don't see why to call it a punishment and second because it has always a kind of a sign of weakness connected to it. If i need to rely on fear and punishments to feel in control and aware of my place it often shows just the opposite... how weak my position already is. As i said there are exceptions but in general i see it is often as a sign of fear on the masters side...

And of course there is also the version of letting the slave do things he hates just because the Master likes them, some even likes the fact that the slave hates them (kind of mild sadism). While you now can call that punishment, what some do, i feel this is misleading.
It is a task that the slave hates and is doing for her master anyway because the slave wants to please him (and not out of fear of a punishment). I think i not to long ago started to fully understand the dynamic behind it and in some way i start to see it as the sign for a deep commitment... To call such an act punishment is in my eyes sure misleading in any ways... but anyone their own.

Merlin, if i could thank you for this post. I would.

[majik]

thats crazy talk, punishment is by definition a means to restore order or justice or whatever else you choose to call it, i.e. an eye for an eye. If you do something bad/wrong then something bad is done to you so that you know the cost of breaking the rule.
if you are punished for no reason then you are being abused.
this is different, some people may be in to this but you should not accept it simply because they are your 'master'.
BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD

[mistressizzy]

Originally Posted by TensionRoom101

A lot depends on what you call punishments. Canings, floggings, spankings? Then no, not at all. That's something my sub craves, and as such I'm hardly likely to use it to punish her.

No. If my submissive disappoints me, then I'm more likely to withdraw privileges than meet out some physical torture. I'm a parent first and foremost, and the first rule of parenting is don't reward bad behaviour- and the same applies to D/s dynamics too.

First though, I must analyse just why I feel they have disappointed me. Certainly if they've done their best but fallen short of my criteria, then they should be rewarded for doing their best, and I must check myself on my flawed expectations. To blame my sub because I can't gauge where her limits, tolerances and ability to comply is wrong. No doubt she'll be punishing herself enough without me rubbing salt into her sense of inadequacy. Surely it is I who misjudged her, when she puts her unwavering trust in me to help her grow?

If you mean where she's deliberately being bratty or disrespectful in order to secure a spanking or provoke me into an impromptu D/s session, then she's more likely to be rewarded with a withdrawal of communication for 48 hours, or some other such action on my part.

I'm not a subscriber to the notion of punishment for punishment sake, or because I think it makes me more of a man. It doesn't. Any asswipe can tie a girl up and whip her til she cries or passes out. If I felt obliged to do that to my beautiful Lady in order to feel in charge, then I'd consider myself emasculated, not macho.

Mike

THIS x100
It depends what you define as punishment - my slave is okay with masturbation and getting himself off, enjoys vanilla sex and being coddled, but goes wild for pain and denial - so if anything I've got it the other way around - if he pleases me his reward is to be punished, if he doesnt particularly please me we can have a vanilla session, and if he pisses me off he gets permission to get off if he wants - simply because I know he doesn't enjoy masturbating without me giving him attention, and the fact that I don't care is one of the worst "punishments"
Hrm I guess if you want to feel a sense of power over another human being you can do the random-punishment thing, but it's quite juvenile to "test" your sub (and see how much unwarrented abuse they can take)