Ella-Bella

babyyyy · 08-29-2009, 06:52 PM

Maybee you could help me come up with a better title. it kinda does a lil thing like into the future then it goes back and tells how it lead up to there.

Okay:
Prolouge

Ella breathed harder and harder everytime he put his massive throbbing dick into her very wanting pussy. She was panting and almost out of breath. Finnally after what seemed like 2 hours Gieurmo said, "let me kno when you want me to stop." Giuermo was Ella's first, but she knew she wasn't his. She figured she was gonna go all out on her firs time, so she said, "i want.....you to....

Chapter 1:
Ella was new to the city of Venice, actually she was new to the country. Her dad had just been transferred, and she couldn't hated it more. But she figuerd, she was in Italy, why not make the most of it. She was walking around her neighborhood and she sat down at a resturant.

"Buongiorno e benvenuti Bacci, Come posso prendere il vostro ordine?" said the waiter

"I'm sorry, can you say that in english?"

"Of course, I said, Hello, welcome to Bacci, How may i help you?" The waiter said with a very thick, very adorable accent.
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okay i know its short but lemme know what you think

BettyBoop · 08-29-2009, 06:53 PM

I like it, not badly written, I think it has potential and YAY your character has the same name as me

molten man · 08-30-2009, 03:07 PM

Nice start!! You can make it great!!

08-29-2009, 06:52 PM	#1
babyyyy Junior Member Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Manhattan Posts: 16	Ella-Bella Maybee you could help me come up with a better title. it kinda does a lil thing like into the future then it goes back and tells how it lead up to there. Okay: Prolouge Ella breathed harder and harder everytime he put his massive throbbing dick into her very wanting pussy. She was panting and almost out of breath. Finnally after what seemed like 2 hours Gieurmo said, "let me kno when you want me to stop." Giuermo was Ella's first, but she knew she wasn't his. She figured she was gonna go all out on her firs time, so she said, "i want.....you to.... Chapter 1: Ella was new to the city of Venice, actually she was new to the country. Her dad had just been transferred, and she couldn't hated it more. But she figuerd, she was in Italy, why not make the most of it. She was walking around her neighborhood and she sat down at a resturant. "Buongiorno e benvenuti Bacci, Come posso prendere il vostro ordine?" said the waiter "I'm sorry, can you say that in english?" "Of course, I said, Hello, welcome to Bacci, How may i help you?" The waiter said with a very thick, very adorable accent. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- okay i know its short but lemme know what you think __________________ if you loved somebody, would you cheat on them? if you cheated on them, would you still love them? I don't want to wait For our lives to be over I want to know right now What will it be I don't want to wait For our lives to be over Will it be yes or will it be sorry

08-29-2009, 06:53 PM	#2
BettyBoop Angel of Dare Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: England. Posts: 8,249 Blog Entries: 105	I like it, not badly written, I think it has potential and YAY your character has the same name as me __________________ ★Boop Boop de Boop.★ female, engurrland. Ask me anything, click. My tumblr. 18+ ▼

08-30-2009, 03:07 PM	#3
molten man Distinguished Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Mumbai, India Posts: 946	Nice start!! You can make it great!! __________________ MMan 26/m/straight Skype: molten_man007 Kik: molten_man