11-03-2013, 07:17 PM | #1 |
Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 2
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the dare tournament
part:1
There was four best friend they were:Max(a 16 year old horny boy),Alex(a 15 year old who play t or d),Dan(a 17 year old who loves studying) and last there was Ken(he is Dan's younger brother he is 14 years old and love studying as well) One day after school,Max and alex wanted to play truth or dare and they knew that Dan and Ken only have time for studying,so they wanted them to play.They went up to Dan and asked"Hey Dan want to play a game with us today?" Dan replied"Sorry i can't i am studying." Max then said"come on you only have time for studying why can't you play just once" Dan sigh"Fine i'll go." Alex said "ok meet me at my house at 8 o'clock cuz i have the house all to my self! Oh and Dan bring Ken along to ok." End of part 1 will continue if i have comments |
11-05-2013, 10:10 AM | #2 |
Junior Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 21
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cant wait for more!
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11-05-2013, 10:13 AM | #3 |
getDare Sweetheart
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Somewhere in Europe
Posts: 344
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It's still too short to get an idea of the story ... Part 1 just stated the characters and that they are meeting up. Apart from this, try finding an editor ... the grammar needs some touches.
Other than that ... go on and keep it up! Just try to write longer parts which are edited by somebody proficient in grammar!
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11-07-2013, 05:47 PM | #4 |
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 2
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ok
thanks and this is my first time posting a story so i can have grammar mistakes
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11-08-2013, 10:10 AM | #5 |
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: nj, USA
Posts: 39
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Whenever a new character is speaking, make a paragraph. It will make your story look better and it will be easier to read
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11-13-2013, 09:35 PM | #6 |
getDare Sweetheart
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 252
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To set it up properly I think it needs a couple of girls although of course you're hoping for boy to boy action, you can still make that work. It needs to be fleshed out, not just what happens but also describing how the characters are reacting or feel about playing such a game etc... Good luck you're writing what you want to write about so go for it.
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