Why I write.

I've often wondered why I write so much yet never post it. A few days ago I posted a poem called All Your Senses into my blog. It's staying there, so you can read it if you want to.

Fact is I write a tonne of stuff. I write non-fiction, fiction, poetry, songs, scripts and yet I never post them. I've often wondered what the point of it all is.

I've considered getting an account on an amateur writing site and posting there, but after having a scout around I realised that the only ones which are worthwhile (and free) are the one's which only really post erotica. Maybe I'm just missing something obvious.

I considered posting to here too, but about 95% of what I write is non-erotic or vanilla. So probably not the right place for it.

So why do I write? I've never really known. I do it despite it being, for all intents and purposes, totally pointless. No-one but me will ever read them. I'll be the only person to know the plots, characters, melodies etc.

I think I do it because if I don't get things out of my head I'd go insane. I tell people that I'm a creative person, but that's only be the half of it. I have about 5 ideas every hour for something new. If I didn't get them out of my head I'd probably get all clogged up and just break. Seriously.

I think that it's become a way for me to write down exactly who I am. I can read back through, and (after cringing a little) I can start to paint a picture of my personality. One thing which becomes painfully apparent is that I am very, very afraid of death.

Maybe I will publish at some point. Paint a picture of a frustrated and confused 18-21 year old who was afraid of dying and felt insignificant. I'm considering posting more poems on here, but not sure about it yet.


Anyway, this is another in the long line of babbles which help to unclog my really bizarre head. Sorry.