The following represents my own thoughts and feelings only. Naturally I am 100% correct in everything I think, do and say, but differing opinions may exist.

I am not a masochist, not even slightly. In fact, I am an utter wimp when it comes to any sort of pain. But I sort of understand the why of masochism. I am aware of the neurochemical responses which can lead to a natural high. I am cognisant of the release of emotional tension through controlled and safe pain. I get that there...

Recently Icy and I have had a couple of conversations in which she has commented we are equals. She is right. She went on to say that in our relationship, we both have the right to feel happy, have our needs met. She was right. But all this was prefaced with the statement that she is not under me. That part is wrong. Explaining why the third statement is wrong when following the previous two is not a light or easy matter. On one occasion I was typing on my phone, and I refuse to go into detailed...

This was given to me by Sain for the 100 thread:

Write a blog post containing 100 different words that are sexual and/or kinky in some way. Have your wand on your clit on the low setting while doing this.

I tried to list only ones that I have tried, felt or want to try myself.

1: Submission
2: Surrender
3: Submissive
4: Slave
5: Dominance
6: Dominant
7: Master
8: Sir
9: Daddy dom
10: Cowgirl...

On the twelfth day of christmas, my Dom he gave to me:

12

Spoiler:

rubber band snaps,

11

Spoiler:

minutes wanding,

10

Spoiler:

topless squat thrusts,

9

Spoiler:

booby cane strokes,

8

Spoiler:

pubic hairs tweezed,

7

Spoiler:

zaps to my foot,

6

Spoiler:

minutes deepthroat

5

Spoiler:

Clothes pegs

4

Spoiler:

minutes porn

3

Spoiler:

edges,

2

Spoiler:

hours plugged

And a ruined orgasm for me.

Like an advent calendar, Icy may open one box for each of the 12 days, so she won't know in advance...

So for a long ass time I have had 5 orgasms on cam with Heart on my backlog of tasks from an old thread. I asked AM if I could have an orgasm and he said if Aimee watched and it turned out tonight was a rare oppurtunity where we were both around and able to cam at the same time.

So after grabbing my wand and getting all shy and nervous and awkward and Skype calls playing up a little we were finally able to connect on the group call with AM.

I complained I couldn't see either...

I am feeling inspired lately to reach the goals I want and why wait until new year to start working on them? This blog is mostly a public way to keep myself motivated and I'll be updating this blog as I progress. Ideas to encourage and help me reach any are welcome and will be considered, but AM has final say on them.

Goal one: (Date set: 16/11/18)
Lose 10llbs.

This is always a tricky area for me as it's so easy for me to fall back into old and dangerous habits given...

Well, I am finally back home at my house! It was a slow walk from my friend's car to the house. It was that one step at a time too up the stairs and I made it. Then that walk inside the home sweet home. My housekeeper has been doing a good job in how she made the house smelled so refreshed and the smell of French vanilla throughout the front room and the dining room. The tree looks so beautiful with that Angel on top and knowing Christmas is not far away. I have been just taking it easy and very slow...