Abandonment
Posted 01-26-2015 at 01:20 AM by sparklystar
So as you have probably seen I haven't posted in ages. There is a reason.
My Master, my flat next door neighbour, my coursemate, has abandoned me. Literally. He sees me coming out of my flat, he'll slink back into his even if it means being late for lectures.
He has found a 'willing' girlfriend to have sex with. Apparently this was an issue that because I have religious views to follow and can't have sex, he wasn't happy, even when he said he'd wait for me.
As a result I have kind of given up following any sort of lifestyle rules and being submissive because you just get hurt when something shiny and more interesting arrives.
So sorry. Sorry for making you all wonder where I was.
My Master, my flat next door neighbour, my coursemate, has abandoned me. Literally. He sees me coming out of my flat, he'll slink back into his even if it means being late for lectures.
He has found a 'willing' girlfriend to have sex with. Apparently this was an issue that because I have religious views to follow and can't have sex, he wasn't happy, even when he said he'd wait for me.
As a result I have kind of given up following any sort of lifestyle rules and being submissive because you just get hurt when something shiny and more interesting arrives.
So sorry. Sorry for making you all wonder where I was.
Total Comments 9
Comments
-
OMG...wow...I can't even begin to imagine the hurt/pain you are going through right now.
I can only share my sympathy for you - it is never good to meet someone who you have opened up to, trusted and held close to your heart only for them to drop you like a meaningless toy because they have found another...
I truly hope you will find comfort again soon - just know, that he is the lowest form of a 'master', or even a person for that matter, can be.Posted 01-26-2015 at 02:37 AM by M.G 
-
I wondered what happened as you didnŽt come online since some days, but this is so badly sad to hear from you. Because it seems both of you fitting perfect to each other and it also appears that he was ok with it, to leave out the sexual thing. But sadly it seems just to be an illusion.
I just can imagine how much he had hurt you and how much pain this causes to you at the moment.
But as M.G. wrote before, i hope youŽll recover from that as soon as possible and learn to laugh again.Posted 01-26-2015 at 02:44 AM by Looking for ..
-
My heart goes out to you. Along with sharing my sympathy to you. I truly cannot think or feel the emotional sorrow, hurt, pain in which you are going through. Along with that deep feeling of being crashed. Yes, from how you must deal with such a thing, in which you never thought would happened to you.
You trusted a person, in which you were honest from the start and believed in. You open yourself up and trusted from the opening of your space and truly, that is what must tear your inner feelings more then anything. Trust is not given out easy in the way you put your trusted in him.
I truly believe that this would not take place with you , because you gave so very much of your soul to him. You, gave from your heart in which to him truly didn't matter or count for that respect that you were entitle too. Yes, that respect for you truly was not there, as he just toss you away like a piece of nothing. That is why, my heart goes out to you. You are a very special person, and I am truly sharing that with you. You were honest from the started, yet he was not honest with you.
Please stay strong, and know that me along with others are here for you.
He agree to no sex, and yet, he went back on his word. Because of that loss of respect for you in which is so very important to you.
He truly didn't deserve you!Posted 01-26-2015 at 04:00 AM by MasterDaddy02
-
I feel so bad for you. In this kind of relationship you really do give so much of yourself to someone very quickly and by definition so much of yourself is entwined with your dom/sub so this kind abandonment must be devastating. If you need a friendly ear or anything at all, please pm me, I'm a very friendly monkey and never bite
Just know you aren't alone in this.Posted 01-26-2015 at 06:01 AM by pet monkey
-
Thanks everyone. Your words are so nice. I've had several days to come to terms with it all and its left me questioning if a master/sub relationship is right for me and the reasons why I'm so submissive.
There is a little bit of resentment to my master but I can understand his views and as such I have accepted it just wasn't right for us.Posted 01-26-2015 at 06:34 AM by sparklystar
-
I'm so sorry for you. It is really painfull to be dropped like this and I understand, that you question yourself. But if the sexual thing was so important to him and he didn't respect your point of view, it is better this way. He would not have been happy with the relationship and there would have been a time, where you would not have been either.
So heads up! You are amazing and I'm sure you will find someone who deserves someone like you!Posted 01-26-2015 at 09:40 AM by malesub19
-
I am sorry that you have had to go through this. Just know that we are all here for you, so you don't have to deal with things alone. If you ever need anybody to talk to, I can vouch for my monkey (he really doesn't bite too much), but I also would love to talk with you through PM as well.
It is perfectly reasonable to be having doubts and questioning what you need/want going forward. I would advise that you should take some time to yourself to let yourself heal and really get to understand what you need to make yourself happy. If a D/s relationship is something that you need/want in the future, please don't let one bad experience ruin you from the lifestyle in its entirety. There really are some amazing doms out there just waiting to have you as their sub.Posted 01-27-2015 at 12:05 AM by Butterfly
-
Thank you. Everyone's kind words really help to cheer me up.
Posted 01-27-2015 at 01:12 AM by sparklystar
-
"I have religious views to follow and can't have sex" ... we must be honest, not many people would let religion and having sex interact with each other. I respect your choices and don't really care if you have sex or not. I'd just not be happy if my girlfriend at that time called for something like "religion" not to have sex. If you decide yourself that you don't want to have sex for a while, that's fine. If you decide that you would like to have sex but that some kind of religion is prohibiting you from doing it, that seems to be missing the point. Religion is just a set of rules that some guy or a bunch of guys decided a while (depending on every religion) ago. It's fine if you whish to live by that kind of rules, but it seems odd to expect somebody else to respect those rules too if they are "too odd". You have gotten a lot of feedback of persons supporting your choice, just wanted to give you an other view on the topic.
Posted 01-28-2015 at 04:09 AM by sadisticmastert
