Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe Kavalier
Hi An_Jon,
You asked for some naughty questions, although it was a few days ago. Hopefully you don't mind answering them now…
1. Where is the riskiest place you've ever jerked off or gotten it on with a partner? Ever been caught?
2. Please relate the funniest thing that's ever happened to you in the bedroom (perhaps the yogurt incident?), but using only one or more haiku.
3. You've told us how tall you are, but what about Jon Jr.? (Asleep AND awake…)
4. What's the largest/most unusual thing you've ever had up your bum?
You do a great job answering questions, well done! Totally unsurprised that you're a writer IRL.
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I'm always ready to be naughty. Let's begin
1. Jerked off? I'd have to go for on a friend's sofa while I was crashing at their's. Another friend was sleeping across the room, and even though I was discreet there was a small part of me hoping I'd get caught...
2. Now we're talking:
Muller nightmare time,
Semi-bouncing down the stairs.
Hide behind the cloth.
____
Essentially, what
happened: we decided to
play Truth or Dairy
I lost the first bet.
Laying back, boyfriend spooned
me in a new way.
A bad workman blames
his tools. He dropped the spoon, damn.
Too much for one tongue.
Cold, sticky, smelly,
The flag's at half mast, won't do.
Mourn the lost private.
Cleaning cloth kept close,
close to unaware housemates.
Still, need to move fast.
They don't know I'm Bi,
Don't know I'm fucking him, too.
Run, grab, clean, fuck. Plan.
"If you get caught, the
jig is up. We'd have to fuck
in the living room."
I fucking love haikus.
3. Jon Jnr is Just shy of 8" when fully awake. Too lazy to get an exact measurement. When he's asleep he's a fair bit smaller: we're talking way shy of 3". I'm a grower, def not a shower.
4. About 3/4s of a 500ml Lucozade bottle. A Lucozade Orange, if you must know.
Thanks! Your kind words are very much appreciated
Please, keep firing questions over. I'll answer whatever you have
