[Runesmith]

I have had married subs before, and currently have one on a long distance relationship in Singapore (whom I only meet physically when I travel there) and one close by to where I live.

Married subs are way more complicated to manage, mainly because they have a life outside of you. And many married subs operate under a higher risk. It is the dom's responsibility to ensure that discretion is maintained, as the sub may often forget it in her eagerness to obey.

The life situation with married subs is more volatile, and you have to make allowances for that. There will be many situations where they go "dark" without being able to leave you a message. The dom needs to be flexible and handle such situations without adding extra stress on the sub.

In your particular situation, the phrase "Her young husband is "fine" as long as he's not around to watch his wife serve" might indicate that she is actually doing this without the explicit consent from the husband. Many married subs say something similar in the beginning because they don't want to scare the guy off. She may eventually come clean and tell you the whole truth, but in the meantime, you should maintain discretion under the assumption the husband doesn't know.

Even in cases where the husband has consented, you still need to maintain discretion, as friends and neighbors of the sub would definitely not be in the know.If a friend/neighbor sees and informs the husband, in the best case you will no longer be able to see her, and in the worst case, her marriage will break up. Even if the husband has consented, once an affair goes public, there are very few options left.

Married subs are looking for someone outside marriage because they don't feel fulfilled. Once you fulfill their desires, there is a risk that she becomes infatuated with you, and may start seeing you as the "perfect husband." If this is your intention - it's fine. If not, then you need to remind her where the line is drawn and never lead her on with anything that might suggest you wish otherwise. In your narrative, the fact that she wants a lot of attention etc is already a red flag in this direction, so for both your sake, you should make things very clear about where you see the relationship going. And yeah - never get her pregnant.

The best way to manage a married sub is by learning her routine, and adjusting your contact times to parts of her schedule when she is likely to be alone. Make sure she puts a passcode on her phone (which is not known to the consenting hubby), and that she turns off full-text on-screen notification for received messages. Make sure when she adds you as a contact on her phone, she uses a generic name (eg. "Mike" instead of "My sex god").

Other than that, enjoy your time with your sub. You are a lucky guy.