[honeyness]

Again apologies for late reply. I always endevour to reply as soon as I can, just many life things get in the way!

Star Shadows has provided some excellent advice that I advise you to read carefully. I’m going to take care not to repeat all that Star has said, although I totally agree with her advice. I instead am going to attempt to add to it.

The first advice I would give anyone heading into a relationship with a Dom, and something I wish to emphasise since you have gotten into bad relationships previously is to take your time and go at your own pace. To build trust in any relationship takes time, and having been through some bad experiences in the past it’s important you take it at your own pace and don’t embark on anything until you are certain you can trust the potential Dom. Despite the fact you will ultimately be taking a submissive role in the relationship you should has as much, if not more say in setting the boundaries in the relationship with your Dom, and deciding whether they are trustworthy.

In terms of questions to ask them, this depends a lot on what you want to gain from the relationship. Make a list of everything you want, desire and need in a D/s relationship from likes and limits right down to the times you will be free, and most importantly the aspects that will give you security and allow you to trust a Dom. Once you get what you want in your head, use what you want to ask targeted questions to a potential Dom. Reading that back it sounds a bit confusing so for example:

* One of your likes is orgasm denial, you could ask your potential Dom if they are interested in orgasm denial?


* If providing an image with your name on it would help to identify the person for you, you could ask if they would prepared to do this?

* If you require commitment, you could ask about previous relationships, and how long they lasted/how well the worked?

They are just a few examples off the top of my head, you can make the list your own. If you are certain of what you want from a relationship, it will make it a lot easier to target questions to potential Doms to ensure they meet your needs. Also definitely linger on the topics Star raised in her post, she made some very valid points that should be useful for you. Trust can only be built over time, and if you have any doubts that you cannot trust a person you should turn your back on them and not enter into a BDSM relationship with them.

Good luck for your search and if you ever need anyone to help we are always here!

Honey