21 F - Training to be better at being on top/riding. Advice? Tasks? Help please!

[PinkPassion]

Hi guys (and girls!)
I used to/can be very passive in bed besides being VERY passionate about giving blowjobs. I've always wanted to be on top more, but because of my lack of experience I don't feel comfortable doing it. It's not because I don't want to do the work... because I want to be an entertaining fucktoy. And I love giving any kind of pleasure... I'm just... shy... and inexperienced in that specific area.

Do any of you know any exercises that give girls more control on top? I assume building flexibility, strength, endurance and balance would help. But as I have never been on top, I don't know what kind of exercises would be relevant.

And guys... can you describe to me what you love the most when your partner is on top? It can be anything. I'm just looking for inspiration.

And girls... if you have any tips or tricks. I would love to hear them!

If any of you can think of any tasks that I could incorporate in my daily routine to prepare myself better for the first time I get on top. I would be forever grateful!!

[MichaelAtlas]

Personally I've always liked doggy style more, or other positions that have me in the more active role instead of the girl, but there's fun to be had with cowgirl and reverse cowgirl. Best part (for me) about cowgirl is getting to see some nice breasts bouncing and having your hands free to grope and tease them(especially if I've put some weights on her nipples before), while best part about reverse cowgirl is having my hands free to spank that ass bouncing on my cock.

Considering these things get either a big pillow or roll up a blanket, get on your bed, put a dildo on the pillow and ride that 3 sets of 10 minutes, one set grope your breasts, one set spank your ass, one set with nipple clamps and attached weights. Once you get more comfortable with the balance add a set with your hands tied behind your back, I tried that with an ex and it was much harder to keep her balance without being able to move her arms.

You should also start with a warm-up before it, how many squats can you do in a set ?

[Jajuju]

First, relax, don't overthink.
If you don't feel comforable watching some adult movies with your partner, and trying to copy them, then use some alone time to take a peak here and there. See how the "starts" do it. The positions, the sounds, the movements. Sooner or later you'll ease out and try and copy it

[Sammylikes]

Here is what I cen tell you from a guy perspective :

First of all, you will not just "sit" on your partner. It may seem obvious but it means that your abs, thights and back muscles will be quite solicited; you'll need some strengh and endurance if you plan on keeping the pace more than a few minutes. An obvious way to train is, of course, to ride a dildo (which allow you to have fun at the same time ) but doing a few sit-ups and squats every day is also great and can be done even if you don't have much privacy .

The second thing is you have to remember it is not just about going up and down. The angle at which you position yourself is very important too (generally speaking, a girl standing more straight means deeper thrusts). I also love when my partner adds a little rocking motion (from left to right or in small circles) on top of the thrust.

Finally, remember to be carefull while riding as you expect him to be carefull when he is on top. If you're not, you may hurt you both, especially if he slips out of you just before you come down on a powerfull thrust (yes, that may hurt) or if you take himm too deep and too violently (I once hit the cervix of my fiancee like this, trust me, it's not great if you're not into it and kot prepared xD).

Here is what comes to my mind. If you have more specific question, don't hesitate to ask.

[garder80]

make sure you can mount a cock without using your hands, that always impressive - train this with your suction cup dildo

whisper in his ears if you want him to fuck you hard later in another position or just want him to relax and enjoy for now

always make it clear if you are riding him to tease him or to pleasure him or to have him grab you after a while

give him a show and tease your tits while you ride, or present your tits to his mouth

[PinkPassion]

Originally Posted by MichaelAtlas

Personally I've always liked doggy style more, or other positions that have me in the more active role instead of the girl, but there's fun to be had with cowgirl and reverse cowgirl. Best part (for me) about cowgirl is getting to see some nice breasts bouncing and having your hands free to grope and tease them(especially if I've put some weights on her nipples before), while best part about reverse cowgirl is having my hands free to spank that ass bouncing on my cock.

Considering these things get either a big pillow or roll up a blanket, get on your bed, put a dildo on the pillow and ride that 3 sets of 10 minutes, one set grope your breasts, one set spank your ass, one set with nipple clamps and attached weights. Once you get more comfortable with the balance add a set with your hands tied behind your back, I tried that with an ex and it was much harder to keep her balance without being able to move her arms.

You should also start with a warm-up before it, how many squats can you do in a set ?

How many squats I can do depends on how many hours it has been since leg and/or booty day at the gym I'm not very fit, but I can usually do 100 squats without taking a break. But if it has to be more, I need small breaks inbetween.

And I agree on the love for doggy style. I also think that will always be my personal favorite. I just want to have more to offer.

I put my suction cup dildo on a small flat surface on top of a pillow. I usually don't use toys in my pussy, and I was shocked at how deep it got inside me right away when I straddled it. The pain from it was unexpected. Not extreme, but sharp. I don't think there was anything wrong, it was probably just a combination of the fact that my pussy haven't been filled with anything for months + how deep the dildo got inside me because of the position. But I'm a masochist, so it turned me on.

The first 10 minutes went okay, it took me a second to figure out the right angle, but afterwards the rhythm took over. I was a little bit self conscious about my big tits bouncing all around, but I try to remind myself that some things that I find embarrassing or too vulgar, some men - if not most men - will probably like. What I did notice during the first 10 minutes of this... was how it's so much easier to get close to orgasm when riding instead of being fucked. I didn't know the control of the pace could make -that- much of a difference. If I had touched my clit even for a few seconds it would have brought me over the edge, but I knew I needed both energy and desperate need to handle the pain from the nipple clamps later on. So I didn't touch my clit.... but I still got dangerously close a few times... because my clit is rather big and I could really grind it against the surface if I pushed myself all the way down on the dildo while rotating my hips slightly.

I love a good spanking. And during the next 10 minutes my pussy got so wet from being turned on by the mild-moderate pain. I also realized how bringing my hand behind me to slap my butt made me lose my balance sometimes, so I definitely have to work on that.

I did struggle a lot during the last 10 minute set, so much I actually didn't complete it. I have very sensitive nipples and the pain that gets to me the most is the pain from nipple clamps. When I rode the dildo with nipple clamps on, my bouncing tits swung the chain between the clamps up and down... constantly pulling in my nipples. And because I'm not used to having my pussy filled... it got so sore so quickly. And even though my dildo is rather thin and relatively long (without being extremely long) it felt wayyyy too big inside me. My inner masochist loves the pain from the deep penetration... but it was getting too much. My pussy and lower stomach hurt... not alarmingly so, but just very, very sore.

So I stopped after only 3 minutes of the last 10 minute round with the nipple clamps. I will attempt again. Sorry for failing. But thank you for helping me!

[PinkPassion]

Originally Posted by Jajuju

First, relax, don't overthink.
If you don't feel comforable watching some adult movies with your partner, and trying to copy them, then use some alone time to take a peak here and there. See how the "starts" do it. The positions, the sounds, the movements. Sooner or later you'll ease out and try and copy it

Thank you for your advice. It's a great idea to focus on the sounds and micro movements as well. I'm watching porn right now and will try to copy it to the best of my ability. If any of you have a specific video with a great example (in your opinion) please send me a private message with the link.

[MichaelAtlas]

You did a great job on my task for your first try; You're encouraged to take a short break between sets if it gets too rough to keep up with, and just use your mouth to service the cock instead during your breaks, after all you're expected to serve with that hole as well.

I know you wanted to rub your clit and cum back there, but you're not allowed to cum when doing the exercise until you're at the very end, you should learn to prioritize the pleasure of the cock over yours.

As for the squats warm up with a simple set of 50, ideally with ben-wa balls inside your pussy, but your smallest dildo held in by your panties / tights will have to do if you don't have those, don't let it fall out !

[bee9]

Do 50 squats on a dildo, the trick is you don't have to go too high - a head should stay in your pussy, then go balls deep. It's not that easy, but will help tremendously.

[PinkPassion]

Sorry for being away. A serious personal matter came up. I'm sorry for leaving you hanging when you spent time on helping me become a better fuck toy. I deeply appreciate it and apologize for my behavior.

I will finish what I started in this thread, but not accept any more new dares to right now as my throat is craving training too and I want to focus on that after completing the dares I missed.

[PinkPassion]

Originally Posted by Sammylikes

Here is what I cen tell you from a guy perspective :

First of all, you will not just "sit" on your partner. It may seem obvious but it means that your abs, thights and back muscles will be quite solicited; you'll need some strengh and endurance if you plan on keeping the pace more than a few minutes. An obvious way to train is, of course, to ride a dildo (which allow you to have fun at the same time ) but doing a few sit-ups and squats every day is also great and can be done even if you don't have much privacy .

The second thing is you have to remember it is not just about going up and down. The angle at which you position yourself is very important too (generally speaking, a girl standing more straight means deeper thrusts). I also love when my partner adds a little rocking motion (from left to right or in small circles) on top of the thrust.

Finally, remember to be carefull while riding as you expect him to be carefull when he is on top. If you're not, you may hurt you both, especially if he slips out of you just before you come down on a powerfull thrust (yes, that may hurt) or if you take himm too deep and too violently (I once hit the cervix of my fiancee like this, trust me, it's not great if you're not into it and kot prepared xD).

Here is what comes to my mind. If you have more specific question, don't hesitate to ask.

Thank you so much for taking the time to help me. Even though I disappeared for personal reasons, I did read your reply before doing so. I've been doing more squats and sit ups since then than I did before. It has built up my endurance and balance (surprisingly) quite a lot. Thank you for the suggestion. It's not as fun as riding a dildo, but it's nice to be able to work on my endurance without making my pussy completely raw at the same time.

After reading about your mention of a rocking motion, I have been doing more work outs that focus on hip flexibility and hip movement isolation. I didn't know how much the hip flexibility helps until after I started to focus more on it. So thank you for giving me that idea.

A question for guys: Of course I know I have to be careful not to hurt him and not just bounce ungracefully on top of him. But when/if you hit your girl's cervix... does it hurt you too? I personally don't mind the pain from it (masochist, hello)... but if it hurts him too, I will definitely have to be more careful.

[PinkPassion]

Originally Posted by garder80

make sure you can mount a cock without using your hands, that always impressive - train this with your suction cup dildo

whisper in his ears if you want him to fuck you hard later in another position or just want him to relax and enjoy for now

always make it clear if you are riding him to tease him or to pleasure him or to have him grab you after a while

give him a show and tease your tits while you ride, or present your tits to his mouth

I still have trouble mounting the cock without the use of my hands. Even when I'm very wet, it's such a tight fit trying to get the dildo inside me. Especially the head of it. So I haven't quite mastered the graceful no-hands technique yet. But I'll keep trying.

During my ride training I sat in front of mirror that stood slightly tilted up against the wall... so I could get an idea of what he would see from his perspective. It makes me so shy to see my tits bounce like that, but at the same time... it's so mesmerizing to look at.

[PinkPassion]

Originally Posted by MichaelAtlas

You did a great job on my task for your first try; You're encouraged to take a short break between sets if it gets too rough to keep up with, and just use your mouth to service the cock instead during your breaks, after all you're expected to serve with that hole as well.

I know you wanted to rub your clit and cum back there, but you're not allowed to cum when doing the exercise until you're at the very end, you should learn to prioritize the pleasure of the cock over yours.

As for the squats warm up with a simple set of 50, ideally with ben-wa balls inside your pussy, but your smallest dildo held in by your panties / tights will have to do if you don't have those, don't let it fall out !

You speak the truth. My holes are not meant for my pleasure. They are meant to serve cock. I need to keep my priorities straight.

I bought 2 ben wa balls earlier this week. They were the smallest and heaviest I could find (the smaller and heavier they are, the more difficult they are to keep up)

I found that I could easily do 50 squats without dropping them. So I challenged myself because I was curious. I did 288 squats and then I dropped one of them. I was getting so wet from squeezing around them, while feeling the burn in my legs and butt. I find that non-sexual pain sometimes turn me on when combined with sexual pleasure. Things like sore glutes or the mild pain from stretching (not my holes, regular stretching) can turn me on. So I made it very difficult for myself by being so dripping wet. Those ben wa balls get so heavy and slippery

[PinkPassion]

Originally Posted by bee9

Do 50 squats on a dildo, the trick is you don't have to go too high - a head should stay in your pussy, then go balls deep. It's not that easy, but will help tremendously.

Wow this was more challenging than I anticipated. Interesting challenge. It challenged my balance more than I would have thought. Fuck I really need to work on that. But it's a really nice motivation to squat really deep... slowly feeling my hole filling up. Mhm.

[PinkPassion]

No longer looking for additional, newdares in this thread. The gentlemen already provided me with a very helpful training routine to get better. Thank you all for the advice.