Elizabeth's Journal

[Nerdwedgie]

I can't wait to hear more about your adventures

[Dare_Me_Slut]

Damn, it is very well written and a very good read. Please continue.

[Gymlado]

Can't wait for the next installment

[Dr Jones]

Lady Elizabeth,

I find your blog here most interesting and entertaining and I wish you very well as you go forth. We shall enjoy reading of your developments.

We are a couple from Australia in our early/mid 20's. Although with limited interest and little experience in slave/master relationships, I have recently, almost by accident, acquired a young lad (18) from the UK as an online slave, a relationship that is entertaining me more than I had expected. Thus, I have been reading more into the topic and found your story here most interesting!

My love dear,

Lady M & Gentleman J
(AKA Dr Jones)

[anonymou]

Hello!

Tell us about your vacation at your Master
I will not post a full report of the vacation, but will give a few exciting details and then answer a couple of questions that has been sent to me.

Traveling to Denmark
The morning when I was about to leave I called Master as usual and had about 2 hours until I had to leave for the train. I was packed and all ready to go but then Master tells me I wont be allowed to travel with any luggage, and that I would only be allowed to wear a pair of high heels and a coat.

Master have made me wear that outfit for walks previously, but I was very uncomfortable with his decision. Especially with the border controls between Sweden and Denmark.

I was told to bring my credit card, passport, keys, phone, a headset, a vibrator and a butt plug. The vibrator would have to be on for the entire trip and I wasn't allowed to put it in the coat pocket, the butt plug would have to be in me as usual.

A couple of months ago this would have been too much for me to handle, but even though it was really stressful I could just roll with it. Figured I could hold it while walking and not being right next to people, but that I would have to go to the toilet on the train or already at the train station to "hide" it in my pussy, which was really the only place to put it.

I didn't have to put it inside of me until I was on the train. It was really hard since I had been denied for a month, and I was kind of moaning a little and sweating. Not having any clothes made everything so much worse as well. The old lady I was sitting next to (I had a window seat, of course), asked if I was feeling okay, I said I got really seasick from trains but couldn't really keep a conversation going. That's when I got the idea that I could actually stay on the toilet for long periods not having it inside of me.

When I finally got off the train Master was waiting for me. He laughed and told me that I looked a bit flushed, then he said "take off your coat and give it to me". The station was PACKED with people and I was horrified, I couldn't tell that he was joking at first, but when he saw my expression he laughed again, said it was just a joke and gave me a kiss.

Fucked while sleeping
Master had made me stay up the entire night before so I had been awake for about 40 hours before going to sleep the next night. I have no memory of the event what so ever, but Master taped it and I've seen it afterwards. This is something I had said I was okay with previously by the way.

He first tries to get my legs in under me so I'm sleeping on my knees so to speak. At first I get back to lying on my stomach but at the second attempt he succeeds and I don't do anything about it, I just mumble something. When he pushes his dick inside my ass I don't do anything at all for the first few seconds, but then I wake up and freak out a bit, completely unable to understand what's happening.

Takes me about 10 seconds to understand the situation, and when I do I get up on all four and say "Yes it feels great for me, but I wont do the dishes tonight", which is complete nonsense. After another 30 seconds I'm down on my chest and face against the bed again and pretty much sleeping, and when Master finishes he slaps my ass. I kind of wake up for a second, say "Oh" and then "Leave the money before you go to sleep, I don't take Mastercard".

When he told me that he had fucked me the next morning it felt really odd not remembering it. He didn't show me the video either, but I saw it a couple of weeks later.

Do your Master force you to pee yourself often?
No, I've been put in a situation where I had to wet the bed a couple of times, the one time I described earlier and then I've had to pee in the shower without showering a couple of times.

Master did however have me suck his dick clean after he had used the toilet.

Do your Master make you fuck other girls?
Not really, but he would want to. I've been watching a lot of lesbian porn, almost exclusively. I've spent a couple of hundred dollars on camgirls where we've masturbated to each other, something Master appreciates. I've also done the same thing with another submissive here a couple of times while both our Masters have been watching.

I know that Master would want to see me have sex with other girls, and I'm sure it will happen at some point when we find a good candidate.


with love,
ellie

[Epsilon.GD]

It's very nice to see an update from you. I'm glad to hear you are still a good, obedient submissive. What have your monthly goals been for the last several months?

[degrademeplease]

This is so interesting to read! Good job

[anonymou]

Fitness
Still working on my fitness and health. I'm currently down to 50 kg (110 lb) which is lower than our initial lowest goal. It's a little too low and have started to mess with my hormones, so for the last two weeks, and until I'm back at 115 lb again, I'll have to gain 1 lb each week. I weigh myself every day and sync weight and everything that I eat in an app so Master can keep track of me.

I love my new body and hope that I'll be able to keep the thigh gap even if I gain a few pounds. All the work at the gym is starting to pay of and my butt is getting firmer for every squat. I'm down to a size 4 and can wear extra small tops, something I would never have believed possible before. Master made me give away all the clothes that are of a different size, so a lot of the things he has bought for my money the last months have been given away.

I'm also starting to get really strong. Master actually challenged me to give him a blow job while sitting against a wall with my legs at 90 degrees. It wasn't easy and at the end I think I both cheated a little and got a bit of help from him, but I made it! I was rewarded with sexy underwear, a little black dress and a date at a really fancy restaurant the same weekend.

Completely powerless
As soon as we arrived at Masters apartment he took my coat and locked the passport, credit card etc in a drawer. He took my phone and replaced the phone card with a Danish prepaid card without any money so that he could call me but I couldn't call out. This was in the first 10 minutes since I had arrived with him, I was naked in a pair of heels and he was fully clothed. At that moment I was thinking "Oh shit, I'm never getting out of here..", and I later understood that was his intention.

He walked up really really close to me and said "You know you're my whore, right?" and my voice was quivering when I answered him. He pushed me down on my knees to suck him after some more talking, and then he bent me over a counter in the kitchen. I was still horny as hell from the trip and I don't think I'll ever experience something like that again.

Afterwards he showed me the key to the drawer, put it in a bottle of water and then in the freezer so I would know where it was.

Goal for July and August - Accept Masters physical domination
This was harder than I would have expected but it's an entirely different thing to accept someone telling you what to do to yourself, than accept having them do the same things to you.

Since I was naked at all times while we were inside it would often only be a couple of seconds between the moment I realized that he was going to fuck me to the moment where I felt him inside of me. Master also did a really good job sneaking up on me, and there were times where I literary just turned around and found myself with his dick in my mouth. At other times I would be doing something completely different and all of a sudden have his fingers inside me and I would have to continue my task as he gave me an orgasm.

I haven't had any goals set for September or October (yet), if someone thinks there's anything I should work on please feel free to suggest it.


with love, ellie

[Nwbie]

That was an amazing bit of reading material, also good for you that you were able to get to goal you never thought possible

We are more powerful than we often think

[anonymou]

I'm sorry that I haven't posted anything in such a long time, but a lot of things have happened and I must admit that I have forgotten about this blog for the last couple of months. Looking back at this blog I feel as if I'm a completely different person now than I was when I started to write it, and I really enjoy being able to look back at my own thoughts like this, therefore I thought I should revive this and update everyone about myself.

This post will be a little bit different from the others since there is so much to write, but the biggest change in my life is that I've moved in with Master. As you can imagine this change has completely restructured our entire relationship and I'll need more than one post to describe all of the changes in full, but I'll start this post with a brief description of the changes and then add more details as soon as I have time to sit down and write.

Moving in with Master
Since late August I've been visiting Master pretty much every other weekend, and every weekend over some periods. The first few trips were all very exciting and I felt really nervous as the weekends approached. I spent several hours looking at make-up vid...

(Master wants me to include that at this point he got home from the gym and required my ass for some release)

...eos on youtube and several more hours in front of a mirror trying to really nail the look I was going for. Since I was so embarassed about how nervous I was I couldn't do it at home where Master could see me, so all of this time was spent at work. Not even when I was 14 did I spend so much time applying make-up just to redo it so I could really nail that one look.

These first trips all looked pretty much the same. I took the train on Friday after work wearing nothing but high heels, stay-ups and a coat to cover myself. As soon as we got to his apartment I handed over my passport, phone, keys, wallet and coat for Master to lock away and then I was either told to get down on my knees to give him a blowjob or lean over his kitchen counter so he could fuck me. Looking back at my fantasies a year ago, and what I thought I would be capable, or willing, to do back then, I had truly become a fuckdoll in every sense of the word, at least from my perspective.

Somewhere in October the trips changed and I was told to bring a small bag with clothes and other necessities for my trips. We started to do other things together such as going out to dinner, shopping, going to the movies and so on. At this point I was no longer nervous about the trips, although I was still very excited. I would say that my submission, and trust, to him evolved a lot over this period. Even though I had done some things in public before it was a completely new experience to be told to masturbate during a fancy dinner, to give him a blowjob in the movie theatre or to change into a dress, being completely naked for a while, in an uber.

In December there was an oportunity for me to accept a new position, which was actually a big promotion, and temporarily relocate to Denmark. After a lot of discussions with Master I decided to accept the new position and move in with him full time.

Even though we had discussed this so much the first two weeks were really strange for me. As soon as I got to Master's apartment after work I assumed my role as his fuckdoll and didn't feel that I could bother him with my worries and the stress from the new job, the new environment or anything else. I felt as if he had let his submissive live in his apartment, not to let me live in it with him. Even though we had talked about my work and everyday life a lot before I felt it was more of a way for him to put me in difficult situations than something I should share with him. So even though he asked how I was doing and wanted to talk about it I felt I couldn't be honest and just brushed it off.

All of this became too much after about two weeks when I was preparing dinner Friday night. I was boiling rice to make sushi and for some reason I forgot about it and burned it so badly that the fire alarm went off in the apartment. When Master came in to see what had happened I broke down in tears, crying uncontrollably and asked him to punish me. He sat with me for quite a while as I calmed down and then we moved into the living room. We finally talked, a lot, about how I felt and he ensured me that he didn't want me to keep these things to myself, and that he really wanted me to live with him.

After that breakdown we took a complete pause from any power exchange and he did everything he could to make me feel welcome and at ease living in the apartment. It wasn't until I asked him to be his complete submissive again that we sat down and discussed how that should look like from that point on.

Since this post is very long at this point I'll wrap it up and leave the details for later. I'm now wearing a choker necklace that indicates that I'm submissive, but I can always ask Master for permission to take it off as long as I tell him why I want to do that. Once I've taken it off it's up to me when I put it on again. There are a couple of rules that I must follow regardless of if I have the necklace on or not, but the majority of rules apply only when I'm wearing the necklace.


with love, ellie

[slave552]

Wow I only found your thread just today and I can say Inlove it.
Congradyoulations for moving to your master

Can't wait for you to write about the promised details

[[email protected]]

Originally Posted by anonymou

Are your cameras password protected?
Yes, there's an administrative password where Master can change the angle, zoom and so on. And then there's a normal account where it's only possible to view the camera. The normal account is nothing we've used, but Master thought it was a really nice feature and would eventually want to invite others to watch me as well.

Can you access the cameras from the web or a mobile?
They are accessible both from the web and as an app but I can't tell you much about these since I haven't used them myself.

What's your experience so far? Are you always aware of them or do you forget about them from time to time?
The first few hours after they were connected I was really self aware and felt very uncomfortable. I couldn't keep myself from looking at the cameras all the time and kind of wanted to hide. We didn't put up a camera in the bathroom at first, so when I was in there I stayed a little longer than I needed to and "braced myself" to go out into the room again. I honestly can't say I did anything while I was at home beside being aware of the cameras.

The day when I put them up, and day after that was the worse. On the third day I was still very aware of them but I didn't resist them so to speak. Though since I was very aware of them I constantly thought about all my rules, my posture, what I did and how I did it. When I sat down to read a book I made sure to sit up straight and push my chest out for example, which was nothing I usually did when I was alone. After the first week or so I didn't really think about the cameras anymore. It was at that time Master started to notice how badly I was following my rules when he wasn't around as well, so that came with quite a lot of punishments and training to correct my behavior.

Now that it's been almost two months since the cameras went up I don't think about them at all. My behavior is a lot better and the rules Master has set for me has become a lot more like actual rules than before. Even though this can be extremely frustrating at times it is a huge step towards a real life relationship, which I really love.

Its against the rules to ask for money. We will not pay to see you on camera.

[sir sam]

This is amazing....
I really think making a book out of this would make sense.
I thank you for sharing.

It is so... at the edge....
so... beautifull
so... real

[anonymou]

Hello!

So I'll continue where I ended my previous post and write a bit more about our new arrangement and then answer some comments.

First of all, I'm now Master's girlfriend even though I'm still his submissive. Though this might not seem like such an important categorization and something that had been implied before, it was a very important moment for me when he actually said that he viewed our relationship as such. In our everyday life this doesn't really change anything, but it feels really good to know that his feelings for me does not depend on my performance as his submissive.

The most significant change is that I can now temporarily decide to step out of my role as his submissive by asking him to take the necklace off. There are however some rules, or guidelines, that we've come up with together for this. These guidelines are not really formalized or written down, but I'll summarize our agreement below.

- Master cannot deny my request to take the necklace off, but I must always explain why I want to take it off and it should never be for an insignificant reason. This means that I shouldn't ask to take it off just because I'm tierd or because there's a show on TV I want to watch, but I should ask to take it off if I feel really stressed about work or there is something serious I want to discuss.
- I should not ask Master to remove the necklace in the middle of something, whether that is during a task I've been given, during sex or a punishment.
- Whenever we have removed the necklace it stays off until we both agree to put it on again. However, we will never put it back on the same night as we took it off, but unless there's a specific reason it should be put back on again after work the following day.
- When the necklace is off there's a very limited power exchange, and I don't have to follow many rules. Since some things are hard to revert so quickly my access to money, social media and phone are still in his control, and I still have to follow rules regarding health, eating, fitness, hygiene and birth control, lastly I still always have to be reachable.

The necklace itself is a small chain in silver put together by links and is about a millimeter wide. The trinket is about a centimeter and shaped like a heart with "slave" engraved on the back of it so that it's against my skin and not visible. It's an actual lock with a really tiny key that I'm still a bit afraid that Master will lose somewhere. It fits around my neck with just enough space for me to get one of my little fingers between my neck and the necklace.

I knew that we would buy a necklace for me to wear when Master ordered it, but I had no idea what kind of necklace it would be and when it was delivered I was a little hesitant. My first reaction was that such a tight necklace would draw a lot more attention, and if anyone wanted to look at it I would be unable to take it off, and if they were to look at it they would see the engraving on the back of it. When I first wore it in public I was a little nervous, but it was such an exciting feeling at the same time.

So far I've only requested to take the necklace off four times, the reasons have varied and I wont go into detail about it.

This is really a side-note but I thought it could be interesting to share. I was a bit worried the first time we were going to meet my family and at first I wanted to take the necklace off, but after we discussed it I decided to leave it on which resulted in a very interesting dinner. When we had taken our coats on and were about to leave for the restaurant Master told me to get down on my knees and give him a blowjob, and said that the moment he had cum we would leave so I better not get anything get outside of my mouth. While I was doing my best not to mess up my make-up he gave me a task that I had to complete during the evening. I was only allowed to use the toilet once, and when I went to the toilet I had to take out my buttplug and then hold it or keep it between my thighs or knees. If I went before the starters I had to drink two liters of water before I came back, if I went before the main course I had to insert a vibrating egg for the rest of the evening and if I went before the dessert I would have to pull up my dress and sit on my butt for the rest of the evening.

I really can't do two things at once and couldn't figure out which option was the least horrible as I blew him, but I managed to swallow everything and when we got into the elevator I could see that I didn't smear any make-up either. The moment the elevator doors closed behind us he said that I could either cum before we got to the restaurant, or that I would have to cum while sitting at the table. The car ride was long enough so that it wasn't a problem, but Master kept teasing me and wouldn't give me permission until we could see the restaurant. Needless to say I didn't have the focus to think about my options during the ride.

When we sat down and got our menus I just couldn't imagine sitting there with a vibrator, and much less sitting on my naked butt since that would be visible to half the restaurant. So I chose the first option and excused myself immediately after ordering. The next three and a half hours were extremely challanging, it was so hard to focus on the conversation and I had to take my hand down under the table every 15 minutes or so to rest my legs from clenching the plug, but I made it without dropping it.

We will not pay to see you on camera
I'm terribly sorry if I gave that impression Sir. The cameras I've mentioned was only for Master to see me in my own apartment and never for someone to pay to view them. There was a few people other than my Master that had access to them for a short while, but neither these people were paying for the access.

Your master should just tied you up and fuck your ass until you don't cry anymore
Thank you for your comment Sir. I have forwarded it to my Master and while he doesn't agree with your assessment of that specific situation, he wants me to assure you that he regularly uses all of my holes and often keep me tied down while doing so.

Are you a domestic slave also?
Yes I am, I do all of the cleaning, laundry, groceries, dishes and often cook.

You have small tits you should operate them
Thank you for your suggestion Sir, you are right that I do have quite small tits. However, Master prefers my breast the way they are right now.

What is the worse and best thing living with your Master?
That's a tough question.. The worse thing is probably that I don't like the thought of pee very much, but Master enjoys having me suck him clean after he's been on the toilet. The best thing is definitely the possibilities when you can be physical. It would be too easy to say the sex, so I'm going to say (some of) the punishments. If I've been grocery shopping for example and forgot an item he mentioned (because of course I'm not allowed to write it down), being spanked, fucked and sent back to the store with cum running down my leg is an extremely frustrating, humiliating, and wonderful feeling.


with love, ellie

[little pet]

Thank you for this wonderful blog. I read your last two entries in one breath.
I can imagining you having to adjust to a life together, especially when there's a power Exchange between you two. I think you're very brave and I admire that.
Also, your blog is very arousing to read. The neklace is hot!