Finding the confidence?

[Nelioka]

My question is really all about, how do people find the confidence to do very extreme dares? Or even just harder dares? I'm new to the whole dare environment, and although my likes are exhibitionism/hidden public, being controlled, BDSM, blackmail (somewhat). I find it hard to get the confidence to do many dares involving them. So my question is how do you suggest I find the confidence to do so?

P.S: sorry if this is in the wrong section its really my first post ^^;

[foxknot69]

I don't think it's necessarily "confidence" that leads people to do the more extreme dares, at least the ones that include other people. The big part of those is trust and communication. How much do you trust the person you're giving control to? That's a lot more important than confidence. The right dom/master/blackmailer should be able to make you confident in yourself, so that you are comfortable doing what is asked.

[Nikeryda]

Part of it is probably the experience. They first few times it might be hard but eventually the thrill outweighs the small amount f risk involved.

[Nelioka]

Originally Posted by foxknot69

I don't think it's necessarily "confidence" that leads people to do the more extreme dares, at least the ones that include other people. The big part of those is trust and communication. How much do you trust the person you're giving control to? That's a lot more important than confidence. The right dom/master/blackmailer should be able to make you confident in yourself, so that you are comfortable doing what is asked.

Thanks! You maybe right. I think I would be a lot more confident if I could find a dom in my area. It would probably make me feel more comfortable/safe as well!

[2bchew]

Have you tried any of it yet?

If yes what did you do and how were you able to do it?

Basically start slow and do what you are comfortable with.If you are hesitating or backing out you need to start slower.Of course blackmail and showing your body to strangers is going to take a lot more courage than spanking yourself in your room.Start where you are comfortable and build from there

[Nelioka]

Originally Posted by 2bchew

Have you tried any of it yet?

If yes what did you do and how were you able to do it?

Basically start slow and do what you are comfortable with.If you are hesitating or backing out you need to start slower.Of course blackmail and showing your body to strangers is going to take a lot more courage than spanking yourself in your room.Start where you are comfortable and build from there

Yah see my problem with that is on here specifically I can't find a lot of those kind of dares. Things you can do in the comfort of your room. Everyone here seems to be on another level.

[shadoweater]

There's all sorts of dares on getDare, though sometimes you have to dig into the past a decent amount to find one that fits you. Also, I wouldn't become obsessed with following the exact letter of a dare as written if it doesn't work for you - decided what you're going to try, commit to it, and then do it! I especially like the dice dares for a good balance of knowing up front what you might have to do, and the surprise of rolling the dice and having to do something.

You could always start a "give me dares" thread with an explanation of what you're looking for to get dares that work for you. Or find a good master/mistress who will work with you to push you without going too far (though of course, finding a "good" master can be hard). Plus, having the dare given directly to you might be the push you need to actually try it!

As far as public dares go, I'd say start with "hidden" dares, or dares that are slightly embarrassing but nothing like going nude in public that could legit get you in trouble. Personally, I've been walking barefoot in public a decent amount, which can get weird looks but isn't really too crazy. So I'll end by daring you to go for a walk somewhere barefoot