Old 11-03-2021, 06:28 PM   #1
Goddess Joanna
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Default The AMA of a Goddess.

Urrgh. Here's my AMA. Tear me to pieces. I'm doing so now, apparently. Remember, I don't have much experience at all so, it will be utterly obvious. I'm barreling, tunneling, through though, quickly, momentously, painfully...

I do better with specific questions. Not general, broad, vague ones.

I have had a sheltered upbringing. I am 37 but look around early to mid twenties to people. I am half Puerto Rican and Filipino. 5'7". Long, layered, dark brown, slightly wavy hair, middle of back length. Though it's really curly after a shower if uncombed and it air dries.

I'm demi and sapiosexual. Almost broken somewhat recently, but remain delicately, divinely strong.

My number is 3. irl. All vanilla unfortunately. I feel almost virginal oftentimes.

I love being a woman and wouldn't change, but I feel slighty a bit masculine sometimes in spirit, not looks.

I enjoy penetrating, not necessarily being penetrated unless I'm really horny I guess.

I need a lot of foreplay and depth and hotness to get off quickly and many times in a short period of time, which is rare so it takes me a while to accumulate it all up from everything before I have to make myself cum because of hot play sessions etc., but it's oftentimes something fantasized.

I didn't want to do this AMA because my inexperience. It is a big insecurity of mine and I'm pushing myself to get past it, to more experiences I might want, and not backing out... Trusting in myself and instincts more. Pushing through the pain, and getting more experience and memories that at least are unforgettable on my end. That I won't forget until my body deteriorates. Beyond that my spirit isn't bound to the same eartly woes. So I'll remember much more.

So yeah. Almost no experience. Mosty mental exploration. Unfortunately I don't know anyone locally that I'm into to do it all with.

I'm single by choice. Most people I'm into either it isn't reciprocated or we connect but they are far away. And even then, there are still bumps.

Maybe it's the universe's way of getting me to branch out more and learn quickly and efficiently.

Damn the pain. I guess I am an unwilling glutton for punishment. Masochistic that way I guess. It's probably just that I want what I want and don't want to stop until I get it someday. Fair?

If you ask me a question and I boringly answer out of inexperience, I promise to revisit the question on this AMA and quote the question once I do gain the experience in the future.

I promise to answer to the best of my ability, thoughtfully, and as detailed as possible. Please be patient for my response as I put my best foot forward each time and from different angles.

Remember, specifics. And I'm a newb. Feel free to ask whatever you wish. I'll answer honestly

Last edited by Goddess Joanna; 11-04-2021 at 05:24 AM.
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Old 11-03-2021, 11:38 PM   #2
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I enjoy penetrating, not necessarily being penetrated unless I'm really horny I guess.
Do you say this because you have already experienced it?

What kind of intelligence do you think is the one that attracts you the most? Why?
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Old 11-04-2021, 12:05 AM   #3
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Based on your signature, do you practice meditation and breathing techniques? If so, how did you get interested/were introduced to it?

And a kinkier question: What were the first kinks you explored?
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Likes, Dislikes, and Limits

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Old 11-04-2021, 05:19 AM   #4
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Sweet angel <3 This AMA must be heaven-sent.
When I was 12 in history class I had to write my own verison of the "I have a dream speech" about what my hopes and desires were for the future. It didn't really matter if it was practical or possible. It was an ideal. What's your dream? (Dare to dream a little for me, sweet angel )

Last edited by LimeNLemonade; 11-05-2021 at 01:34 PM. Reason: I'm a rebel without a cause
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Old 11-04-2021, 10:13 AM   #5
Goddess Joanna
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChamomileAngel View Post
I enjoy penetrating, not necessarily being penetrated unless I'm really horny I guess.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SlaveAtimai View Post
Do you say this because you have already experienced it?
I said I almost feel virginal sometimes, yet I am not a virgin. Yes I have been fucked.
Three relationships in real life.
My ex-boyfriend Samuel, when I was 15 and 19. A few months each time.

An ex-girlfriend for 3 years, when I was 23 to 26 years old.

An ex boyfriend, Perry, from December 2014 to the end of August 2017. I was 30 to 33. It lasted a season under 3 years.

Just vanilla fucking unfortunately. And that usually doesn't do anything for me. I never came with any of them.

Besides that I had one online relationship. A submissive girlfriend for almost four years. It was on and off (mostly on) from when I was 33 to 37... It ended in the somewhat recent past. I mention it in my blog. That almost broke me when it ended, though I evolved exponentially after it and continue to do so.

So I would cum whenever I masturbated. Which I prefer not to do, because I'd rather be fucking someone I want then myself. But I haven't been that lucky in real life.

I am picky. There are enough people that want to date me usually, but I am usually not attracted to them.

And most people I know are vanilla.

I know of a few kinky people and only find one of them somewhat attractive, but I don't want to date coworkers. Not a good idea.

I could go to a dungeon, but I'd rather have my girl and my own.

I could get a pro Domme, but I haven't felt submissive in years, and I want something more accessible, like I am. Etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SlaveAtimai View Post
What kind of intelligence do you think is the one that attracts you the most? Why?
Emotional intelligence. The brain of the heart. Manners, Courtship, Chivalry romance, creative/refined/tasteful debauchery ~ or not :-D Either can be delicious.

I'm likely a HSP (Highly Sensitive Person) or a cognitive empath, and more...

I like feeling the soul, the spirit of a person. Sensing them. Quietly observing them and understanding and appreciating a bit more before I talk and engage. I like to get to know them a little first, then I may feel comfortable to engage with them. Doesn't always happen, and doesn't always have to.

Last edited by Goddess Joanna; 11-04-2021 at 12:11 PM. Reason: Edited blog link
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Old 11-04-2021, 10:42 AM   #6
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I'm sorry I didn't express myself well, I was referring more to the part where you enjoy penetrating.

Quote:
Emotional intelligence
it is the most appropriate to fall in love
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Old 11-04-2021, 11:15 AM   #7
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Goddess, what trait or traits do you look for in those serving you?

What is your preferred method of discipline?

Do you strictly control your subs orgasms?

Thank you Goddess
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its' rules: http://www.getdare.com/bbs/blog.php?b=85874
Limits- No pee drinking, enemas,scat,blood, family, total cross dressing,illegal, face cam/photos, body photos negotiable

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Old 11-04-2021, 11:37 AM   #8
Goddess Joanna
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Originally Posted by SlaveAtimai View Post
I'm sorry I didn't express myself well, I was referring more to the part where you enjoy penetrating.
All my partners irl were vanilla ~ so then the guys obviously wouldn't want me fucking them in the ass or in the mouth

My irl ex girlfriend wasn't into toys or strap ons and was vanilla and came quick all the time.

I mentioned part of my online long distance relationship with my ex sub girlfriend in my blog.

So no I don't have experience with it but it's predominantly what I want to do instead of being fucked. I'll revisit this to add more when I penetrate...

Last edited by Goddess Joanna; 11-04-2021 at 11:40 AM. Reason: Edited blog link
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Old 11-04-2021, 11:47 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by ChamomileAngel View Post
So no I don't have experience with it but it's predominantly what I want to do instead of being fucked. I'll revisit this to add more when I penetrate...
I understand, it is something that you feel completes you and what you really need to do to be comfortable with a sexual relationship, something that is inside you.
I hope you find someone who fits you.

I promise to read your blog as soon as I have time
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Old 11-05-2021, 01:26 PM   #10
Goddess Joanna
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Originally Posted by SlaveAtimai View Post
I understand, it is something that you feel completes you and what you really need to do to be comfortable with a sexual relationship, something that is inside you.
I hope you find someone who fits you.

I promise to read your blog as soon as I have time
It feels more natural to me. I can adapt, if I get aroused enough, I might let my partner penetrate me and love it too.

I saw you read the one entry I linked. Thank you for your insightful commenting.
My blog currently has 9 entries but I am of course working on more regularly.

Thank you SlaveAtimai <3 That's very kind. I hope so too. Same to you (if it applies).
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScribeOfThe69 View Post
Based on your signature, do you practice meditation and breathing techniques? If so, how did you get interested/were introduced to it?
I want to practice them. I have done a few and enjoyed it. Also basic yoga.

I procrastinate often with myself. Not much at all on others.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ScribeOfThe69 View Post
And a kinkier question: What were the first kinks you explored?
I'm a switch. I started as a sub years a handful of years back. This is the blog entry that mentions it barely.

Slave inspection. Ice play to my ass and pussy.... Icicles (chilled) glass butt plug. Bobby pins and clothespins to nips. Rubber band snaps to pussy and clit. Spankings with hand. Toothbrush to clit. Household insertables to pussy: Paddle hairbrush handle. Small bronze colored woman handheld statue from Denmark. A large green glass Pelligrino bottle, empty, with cap on so no suction as far as I could put in. A zucchini grown from home garden. A carrot. Underwear control. Orgasm control, permission to cum. Line writing. Pee control with water rules during exercise routine for a short time. I still have my basic black Master Series Submission Collar and Nipple Clamp Union Set. Pink Sharpie for body writing. Rope ~ Sash cord (smooth braid, 1/4") for crotch rope. Rooster's orange Perfect 10 Anal Beads. Was considering getting a metal dildo back then, but didn't get it. Cool metallic feel inside Was going to do messy sometime and much more other stuff but didn't get around to it.

When my long distance girlfriend from London asked me to Domme her, we didn't do as much as we wanted to and she was often busy, but I would still say we spoiled each other. She needed to talk to me as much as possible daily, and I didn't mind. I enjoyed her cuteness and affection.

A couple of normal video calls. Some voice calls. She would often ask for a daily pics of me or a regular video recording. So sometimes I would make a video before I left for work. Or a short one if I had an available moment at work. Or one when I was in the parking lot before heading home. Or when I was around town doing errands.

A few audio recordings of us fantasizing about each other while touching ourself, moaning and cumming. Her trying to seduce me while begging and being desperate, begging me to fuck her and to cum for me.

Pics and videos of her sexually. Me too some, but her more. I'd give her some cleavage pics and a few videos where I was touching myself or in the shower. Full body pics of me modeling a bunch of Victoria Secret thongs, bras, etc I ordered. Her taking pics of the bra and panties I picked out for her to wear for the day.

She would often take pics of the nightgowns I picked for her to wear. I picked which shower robe she wore a few times. Picked a few dresses for her for important formal occasions. She would take pics of dresses or clothes she was wearing at the time with or without request. Sometimes before she went to sleep, I would tell her to flash me her breasts in one pic and spread her pussy lips in another. Sometimes I would tell her to send me a pic or video of her spreading her ass for me and showing me her hole.

Videos of her usually fucking her ass for me in her shower or at her relatives or parents house, or at her own house. She knows I love anal so she was working on training herself to have better anal orgasms for me. She sent me videos of her punishments when I asked, like spanking her ass and pussy and applying icy hot, etc.

She sent me videos of her masturbating. A few of her squirting orgasms for me. Of her fingering her ass. She also would stretch her ass a bit with toys. Icy hot. Clothespins to nipples, clit, pussy, and tongue (briefly). Paddle brush to pussy, and ass. Bullet vibes. She wanted toys I could control both for her pussy and anally. She also wanted a Sybian. We didn't get around to that yet. She loved edging (nipples, clit, pussy, anal) and denial. She broke her record and did about 10 weeks of denial for me. We had short and long sessions...

I also sent her flowers and sweets and mini lit Christmas trees she would set up, from Bloom & Wild every Christmas. Petalon is actually the first choice I wanted to send her, but she's was often at work and Bloom & Wild was the best choice because of their letterbox flowers which are better when waiting around an office. I also made her two care packages filled with thoughtful gifts she might like. And gave her a couple of decent Amazon gift cards to thicken her book collection. She liked receiving my handwritten fountain penned letters in cursive. I also got her a year's Scribd subscription for her love of reading and she also is an experienced pianist so she loved it for the sheet music on there also. She's also sent me Christmas presents and birthday gifts also and plenty of thoughtful cards. And she composed a piano piece for me for my birthday.

It lasted four years and is the longest relationship I've been in so far. It could have lasted longer but it had to end. I mention why in that blog I keep linking.

Last edited by Goddess Joanna; 11-05-2021 at 07:44 PM.
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Old 11-06-2021, 11:51 AM   #11
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Thank you SlaveAtimai <3 That's very kind. I hope so too. Same to you (if it applies).
I do not know .... I am satisfied with trying to make happy and please whoever is around me, but anyway so thank you!


reading you I see that you have tried many interesting things!
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Old 11-07-2021, 05:29 AM   #12
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Hello

I've read a bit in both your thread and blogs, very interesting.

Here are a few questions to bump this a bit:

What color underwear is your favorite?
What is the most cruel dare/task you have sent/received?
Do you own any dogs/cats or any pets?
Flats or heels?
Winter or summer?
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Likes/Dislikes & PM Dares



Would it be trouble if they knew?
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Old 11-07-2021, 06:18 PM   #13
Goddess Joanna
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Quote:
Originally Posted by subslaveboy63 View Post
Goddess, what trait or traits do you look for in those serving you?

What is your preferred method of discipline?

Do you strictly control your subs orgasms?

Thank you Goddess
1.) Appreciation, a little jealousy is okay but not too jealous, trust and respect, cool with open relationship and open commmunication, patient with me and vice versa, kindness, helpful for me/you and I to grow and learn together
Bonus (but not absolutely necessary) if:
into me giving anal :-D , good manners, romantic, open up deeply and closely to me willingly and naturally, open to experiment and push boundaries, sick and twisted enough which you could divulge to me in private <3 :-D ahem..., available often enough, a little playfully bratty but not too bratty, cute, really feminine (heels, corsets maybe, garters, stockings, lace, tasteful makeup and styles hair, etc.)..., a decent wardrobe/underwear/toy collection for me to control whenever I wish to, has good style and eye for design (I like elegance, refinement, sophistication, but I my type is varied so not totally necessary), creative in any way in any field or area of life, arts and craftsy, like to write creatively, if you can dance well lol (teach me ), if you're very considerate and thoughtful,
if you're open to pics/audio calls/video chat/audio and video recordings, kik, discord, etc. I know it's kinda rare but such a bonus <3
I have a crying fetish that I never do... if you let me make you really cry and know I care and still want me then <3
A great beg/groveling with no expectations yet trying anyway so pathetically and genuinely, seductively, persuasively... And~
Doms/Dommes for me are rare and a whole other story. I said this to a friend recently ~

There are very few that I'd want to follow and give myself like that to. I rarely, if at all, feel completely safe and trusting of most and have that connection/chemistry/attraction to let myself submit to someone truly worthy of it. And deep down, I am definitely not compatible to most.

Thanks for the compliment. I know how switches are often misunderstood or not given much credit. Also like how bisexual people can sometimes be.


2.) I like a well done line writing. I'd like to learn how to whip well and someone let me do them. I'm a switch, and with this would want to be whipped too sometimes. I've fantasized about it (like many things) but haven't tried it. I'd be interested to see someone who actually has both a love and hate of corner time. Denial and desperation, lol... Begging/groveling. Bondage and gagged though I need more experience with it as with many things. Clothespins/ bobby pins/clamps... Pussy snaps... Etc.
It ultimately depends on the individual and their dislikes for me to decide. I like using punishments to make sure it doesn't get repeated often, to make one squirm and uncomfortable, and to push boundaries and limits.

3.) It depends on how much control the person wants me to have. The more they allow me to have, the sweeter it is <3
Quote:
Originally Posted by SlaveAtimai View Post
I do not know .... I am satisfied with trying to make happy and please whoever is around me, but anyway so thank you!


reading you I see that you have tried many interesting things!
I'm glad you are aware of what makes you happy and satisfied.

Thanks for the compliment :-)

What I have tried and done is only a drop in the bucket to what I have yet to try and learn and want to do. This isn't just a hobby, it's a lifestyle, I think about and want to do it often and daily
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buttaholic View Post
Hello

I've read a bit in both your thread and blogs, very interesting
Here are a few questions to bump this a bit:

What color underwear is your favorite?
What is the most cruel dare/task you have sent/received?
Do you own any dogs/cats or any pets?
Flats or heels?
Winter or summer?
Interesting I hope in a good way ;-)

1) hard question. It really depends on the the whole thing. Design, color, and fit, and how it matches the one wearing it (complexion or bearing), whether they are comfortable and confident wearing it... shyness is so cute too though.

I would go with the tried and true sexy classics.

Black, white, nude, and red, and any of those combined tastefully with each other.

2.) I haven't received dares. I haven't created my own PM Dare list or written my likes/dislikes/limits/underwear teaser/toy lists, or my mindblowing, exceptionally written advertisement in the slave / master area looking for a female sub yet, lol

The cruelest PM Dare I sent was to my old friend LPV. But he was asking for it. I didn't come out as formerly being Joan Sky yet. I was gone for 3 years. After a month of returning under a new account, he obviously neglected to heed the 'more dominant than submissive' on my profile, and thought he had a shot of me submitting to him, though he didn't talk to me much and thought we were strangers that enjoyed Lounge Games. So I set him straight and used one of his dusty PM Dares which said I could create 3 rules for him within his limits and that it would last for two weeks. He told me he deleted it from his blog after I mentioned it so no one else could use it, but still honored the dare from me.

So it was ~
1.) Once a week ask Triangle for more denial (which cannot be reduced if it's from her) saying it's because he wants to push himself beyond his current boundaries and limits to help himself grow. And that he has to sound convincing and not let her know about this dare until it's over.
2.) Come up with a genuine compliment for me daily for two weeks
3.) No third one. I was kind and removed it since he served me for half a day for Option B (which I will mention shortly), and it was figured it was fair to have him do just two after all that.

It was a possible chance for it to get bad, but more unlikely since he told me she usually isn't around for long stretches of time and he doesn't know when he'll hear from her. But he was still scared about it potentially getting bad if she happened to arrive and do as he asked, so he asked if I could request anything else because he wanted his denial date to not be pushed back further away permanently by her.

So I told him to:
1) be my slave indefinitely until I chose to release him, calling me Goddess
2.) whenever he or I randomly appear in gD chat he must fawn over and focus on me until I silently tell him I'm satisfied and he can simply to talk to others and stop fawning but say bye graciously of course if one of us announce our exit, and I wouldn't allow him to silently chat with me unless I gave him permission to silently when I wished to.
3.) to not let anyone know why he was acting this way toward me or he would get punished.

He agreed and bent the knee because he didn't want more permanent denial.

He couldn't last two chat sessions in less than half a day. He already broke Rule 3 (and was also getting punished for something else) when trying to save face in chat around Salty and knorke and the rest, by mentioning he didn't understand how I found his old PM dares (on his blog), to which I made him look stupid by saying I had no idea what he is talking about, and asked where the dares are that he is speaking of that I cannot seem to find, and asked him if he deleted them. He said nothing :-)

Then that night he told me he couldn't be my slave and call me Goddess for just two weeks, he barely knew me (he didn't know he actually did at the time, that we were actually old Lounge Games friends; I told him knowingly that he might regret it in the future and want to serve me, but that it wouldn't happen yet we'd still remain friends if he wished to, and he said I seem nice and that probably would be the case but he still wanted to be friends)

And he said something like ~ I have had subs on here before Gosh darnet! :-p

Too much for his pride unless he knows you better and you happen to be a polygon :-p But I jest ;-)

Since he couldn't last more than half a day, he resumed the two week PM dare.

.
So that's what could happen when you try to be slick and pressure dominate someone on the the fly without asking or listening to their responses properly. From what I recall he pushed a bit, to which I would politely decline, then the next time he did soonafter ~ SNAP! There you go buddy ;-)

I released him just before the two weeks were up. It was because I almost left the site again because of a silly fight or flight reaction I had with an awesome lady that I mention a little in my blog, but I learned from it with the help of a sweet heart on here, and don't plan on running away like that again.

Anyway, still love you Ellie. We're all good ;-)

3.) I recently acquired two zebra finches and named them Hannah and Rudolph. I have two orange minnows. One dark purple female betta. And 3 dogs I share with my best friend. A 13 or 14 year old female German Shepherd named Rusty (she's half Black Lab but doesn't look it). A 2 year old Black German Shepherd named Brutus (he's half German Shepherd, half Black Lab), and a 2 year old Great Pyrenees mix with half its usually length of long hair and just as big ~ named Navarre from the Ladyhawke movie (all white dog even though he is half German Shepherd, half Great Pyrenees). So that's my pets. My best friend has much more, mostly reptiles, but that's a long story :-)

4.) I love heels on other women, but I don't have much experience with them on myself. I know I clean up nicely and could practice. I'd just probably bust my ass a few times and not look as dignified as one would, but might produce laughter so that's a plus. I would say flats. Heels preferable on other women, at least once in a while would be nice. I would practice if she really wanted me to, and anything else probably but heh, that's more hypotheticals

5.) Both. I prefer winter clothes on myself because I must have been a Victorian in a past life, lol :-p I like summer clothes on others. I like the nature of summer more, but still appreciate the scenery and fun to be had in the snow. I love a good homemade hot chocolate with marshmallows and cuddling up in front of a nice woodburning fireplace with a nice warm blanket and someone special to cuddle up and warm up even more with

Thank you all for your questions now and yet to come.

And LimeNLemonade, I didn't forget your questions sweetheart. I'll respond to it tomorrow or the day after at the latest probably. I always try to answer thoroughly and eloquently to the best of my ability at any given time. And I think of others more than myself in a way, so it will require a little more thought and effort especially since you knowingly asked such a broad question to get sweet insight into my being and my dreams.

You call me your eternal angel yet you are mine. Thanks for spending time with me today.

Sweet dreams wonderful girl :*
~Joanna

Last edited by Goddess Joanna; 11-08-2021 at 05:55 PM.
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Old 11-09-2021, 06:24 PM   #14
Goddess Joanna
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After this question, I'm up to date with all questions asked so far. If anyone else wants to ask something, feel free

***Still editing this whole thing... Will erase this notice whenever I done.
Quote:
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Sweet angel <3 This AMA must be heaven-sent.
When I was 12 in history class I had to write my own verison of the "I have a dream speech" about what my hopes and desires were for the future. It didn't really matter if it was practical or possible. It was an ideal. What's your dream? (Dare to dream a little for me, sweet angel )
"When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down 'happy'. They told me I didn't understand the assignment, and I told them they didn't understand life.". ― John Lennon

I'll have you know that I don't like to answer deep questions like this publicly. I like to reveal myself deeper to those I am close with or feel a strongly compatible and reciprocated connection with.

That being said, I hope this answer proves to be adequate, but I suspect any answer as long as it is an honest one would suffice for you. And for such a broad question, I guess most wouldn't necessarily expect sufficiency outright. So, here it goes ~

My dream has always been to have a happy full life in it's entirety. It wasn't a thought or a dream. It's just what seems natural to me always. It just is.

I have always felt like heaven is the true reality. My true origin along with subsequent origins to follow, this being one. I have felt out of place here all my life however subtle at times, however great at times.

The few times I went, I have had healers talk about my soul, thanking me for allowing them to cleanse my energy, telling me that my soul is so light and full of light and so pure. That made me happy to hear, though I knew.

Yet this Earth, this plane, is very burdensome. It is a perversion of origins. It is a heavy school.

Many have talked to me in person saying I am so calm. That I don't seem to worry as much as others or stress as much as the average person. And while that is true, I have my share of woes.

I know life really is beautiful like my Mom would always say. I feel the way she felt when she said it, thought it, and meant, but it didn't click with me yet. I know life is beautiful, but don't know it the way she knew it. To me life was mainly beautiful because of her. Then because of my best friend. The animals, nature, babies, pure kids, inner childs, creativity, artistry, kindness, harmony, and love make life beautiful.

I know I am also more of healer than I appear to be. So far I have healed a couple of people's worse than average sore hurt back that they told me a normal massage wouldn't help. They almost didn't let me massage them because of that. But they did, and it went away. It's funny how afterwards they didn't take advantage of me after that. They were happy and felt better, but it seems they forgot I could do it or casually decide they don't want me to do it, that their pain is bearable. Which is weird to me. And I usually don't offer a massage to people unless I'm close with them.

Just yesterday night my best friend had the worse calf and inner thigh cramp she had ever experienced because it was the two at once. We both happened to nap at similar times that day. I passed by her room to tell her it was a longer one than usual today, and she had just woke up and was grabbing her legs pitifully. It scared me a little to see my stronger friend like that. I asked her if she wanted a massage, and she was in too much pain to answer. She cried a little the first half of the time. So I went over to her and place my hands on her right calf massaging it. She told me to stay there, the warm in my hands was helping. So I stayed there still and warm and visualized the healing from within and my hands and prayed to God within and without and guardian angels to heal her legs and thighs, then imagined purifying white light from my hands and an endless column of light receive her like a baby being cradled with Love. And I also asked for her to be cleansed by the powerful Violet Flame and imagine it healing her entirely as well. I don't know much about everything but I sense it somewhat latently currently. I made her feel better pretty quickly, and all throughout (beginning, middle, and end, like three times) she kept saying, I'm sorry you have to see me like this. Her warrior spirit pride. She tries to not let anyone see her weak, but especially me. She knows my sensitive heart.

She and a few of my close friends have warrior spirits. Hers reminds me of Vikings, pirates, and dwarves combined. Two of my other somewhat close friends have that warrior archetype also. But for them from where I cannot say yet. I guess I haven't been around them long enough. I am more of a monk warrior. I wouldn't use the term warrior. I like the more peaceful long distance types. Like magic (which I don't do unless it's the natural unconscious soul kind not anything else), archery, aikido, taichi, and ninjutsu. I am usually the monk that gets protected by my warrior friends if rare survival situations were to occur. Up until that point I am their angel, placing myself where I need to be. Protecting them. Calming their warrior spirit which always seems to be restless and at unease.

Which brings me to other ways I heal. By speaking. My voice calms and soothes and makes people relaxed at ease and sleepy. Makes light of a situation, guides/redirects thinking and feelings more beneficially and more understood. Words and kindness can be very healing, especially when genuinely and confidently spoken.

By my presence. When people see how calm I am even when things get hectic, and that my skill actually enhances greatly, it heals in a way. I show them that instead of despair you can face things head on and address them without fear being prevalent or worry affecting your performance but training yourself just as is natural in good times to always keep a calm clear head no matter the storm to maximize effectiveness. You will not be your best if you allow fear and worry and the like to lead your actions. Act. Don't react. You decide everything you do, all your choices. We are creators.

My latent powers are unknown. I have ninja fast reflexes... I am stronger than the average woman and sad to say some lazy or simply weaker males these days. It's similar to the movie Unbreakable with Bruce Willis, but somewhat different. I am not petite, and not big, just average. I rarely ever get sick at all. Even the common cold. It's very rare and few. Whenever I get injured, it heals quickly than usual, even bruises. I've had an almost fatal dog bite, which resulted in over 50 stitches through the several layers of skin, heal in two weeks. I made sure to not look at it for the entire time, because I knew it would affect my thoughts and subsequently my healing process. When I applied antibiotics I looked at it only through peripheral vision. I returned to work two weeks later and the injury is not even noticeable now. Looks like a dimple. You can see it's not so obvious by checking me out in my recent video verification. Yes, it was to my face in August of 2009. Must have had a guardian angel and the Big Guy/Gal looking out for me because my Emergency Room surgeon wanted to be a plastic surgeon before he ultimately decided for Emergency. He was talking to a CNA desk person that he asked if he wanted to assist him, and he said yes. The doctor told the assistant that any deeper and the arterial vein in my cheek would have been hit. He flushed my wounds with saline water to clean it. I screamed out loud a couple of times. My best friend tried to come in when she heard me outside, but of course they wouldn't let her. She may have been told to wait out in the main ER lobby instead of outside my door. I don't remember, and it will hurt her if I ask her to revisit that memory.

My sleep is so restful that my five to six hours equals the average person's well rested 8 hours. Even if I break it into halves everyday, which I do because my earlier work shift to provide a balance and normalcy that works for me. And I can make myself fall asleep within five minutes, even if I am not sleepy.

I talked to a fellow empath at work. She's the classic feeling empath not cognitive like me. She's still learning and newish like me. I gave her some links and videos that I knew would greatly help her and accelerate her on whatever path she chooses to walk down. She told me that she's happy alone. That God made created her whole when she came here and how she couldn't relate to her friends when they liked someone growing up because they were feeling more intense and invested and to her it was more simple of a like but she could take it or leave it. It wasn't as important. And I told her that most people don't come here whole like her. And they try to find that special connection with another to feel it... At the end of her conversation she said that we are whole on our own just like her. We've just forgotten it.

Wholeness is different to everyone. Some require more and other's less. Some are happy with a thimble's full of growth, other's a bucket of water, other's an ocean, and some insatiable.

We all move at the pace that is right for us in the moment. It can change accelerate at any time. And appearances aren't always as they seem. It isn't indicative of how things will be. Just because someone is down or slow doesn't mean they won't soar with flying colors accelerate at some point a little like the tortoise and the hare. The tortoise lacked the ability to be speedy, but had focus, patience, and perseverance. The hare had that particular skill needed focus and humility.

Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. Their talent.

And just because they're down or not suited for something, doesn't mean they don't possess the attributes that make up the balance to rise above the situation.

Everything could seem normal. And then anyone could have their Eureka moment where everything or something clicks and pace accelerates exponentially.

To address your question, lol:

I just want to be free to explore, to love, to be... I want to spend my time sharing it with friends, family, and lovers happily throughout.

I want to have kind of a main person to share life with. I don't mind if we live together or don't. I don't mind if we visit throughout the year when we can, as long as we do the best we can.

I want to live ruraly and self sustainably with my best friend. I'd be around a lot of nature and animals; which I love and can lose myself happily in at times.

Whether whoever will be my main lady prefers to live with me or not is her choice. If she decides to live with me, I can imagine us having an awesome library and art studio Of course our personal dungeon. Our own house near my best friend but far enough away for privacy but close enough and near the farm.

We'd travel the world together. The world wouldn't be as crazy as it is now. Elders would be treated with respect. It would be more harmonious. More learned in the beneficial old ways but could still feel luxurious if wanted. Friends and everyone could make things easier.

Whatever we create together, up to and beyond the sky is the limitless. I feel it will be good and full of possibility.

Last edited by Goddess Joanna; 11-10-2021 at 07:18 PM.
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Old 11-10-2021, 09:45 AM   #15
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Regarding your quote from Meditations, do you seek out philosophical works, classics in particular, or just see what catches your eye?

What else do you grow other than the aforementioned cucumber?
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