[Fiction] Surrogate Revenge Therapy

[FLCL]

Direct Message from @GloboDan92

Hi Jess,

I noticed you venting your anger and sadness about your recent break up. I'm really sorry to hear that your boyfriend cheated on you. That's so fucked up and he's a fucking asshole. No one deserves to be cheated on.

If you're looking for a way to express some of your pain and get it out of your system, I offer a unique form of therapy that can provide you with an outlet for your feelings of anger and helplessness. I call it Surrogate Revenge Therapy. Based on what you've posted publicly about your break up and also my own experiences with bad break ups, I would wager a guess that you're currently wishing that you could inflict on him some fraction of the pain that he has caused you. Personally, I think that you deserve that and I would support you in any measure of vengeance that you sought to extract. But, laws being what they are, you probably don't want risk the legal ramifications, not to mention potential blowback, of seeking vengeance on your ex.

And that's why I offer Surrogate Revenge Therapy. You see, in Surrogate Revenge Therapy, I become a willing stand-in for your ex-boyfriend to exact your revenge. Do you want to slap, kick, or punch him? Do you want to humiliate and degrade him? Do you want chew him out and then deny him as he begs forgiveness? Well, I'd like for you to have that. And if you can't have the real deal, then you can have the next best thing. In Surrogate Revenge Therapy, I stand in as your ex and you do everything you want to do to him to me instead. You simply imagine that I'm him and take out all of your frustration on me. In this safe setting, you can say and do everything that you're wishing you could do to him without repurcussions in a simulated scenario.

If you're at all interested at this point, you probably have a few questions: "How much does something like this cost?" - "Wouldn't it make me feel guilty to take out my frustration on an innocent guy?" - "Is this actually going to make me feel any better?" .. Read on and I'll try to answer all of your questions.

So first, let me try to put your mind at ease. I've performed this service for a number of women already and, so far, I have a 100% success rate. Most of the women I've worked with are hesitant to start. It can be hard to get into a head space where you can imagine me as your ex and just let loose on me. But we'll take our time. There's no rush and no deadline for your treatment. If you decide to start treatment with me, you can take as long as you need to get comfortable with the process, get into the right mindset, and then let loose whatever emotion you're currently having difficulty expressing, be it rage, sadness, powerlessness, or even something you can't name. Given enough time, this has worked for every one of my clients.

And let me tell you that every client is different. I've had some clients that feel better after one 30 minute session and other clients that have required multiple months of therapy. Some women want to cry in sadness or scream in anger as I apologize and beg forgiveness or offer comfort if the situation calls for it. Some women want to slap, kick, and punch, and I curl up and take it. And some women want to take their power back. These women will tell me what to do, what to say, even what to wear. They'll tell me to crawl on the floor, to clean their apartment, to kiss their feet, to beg for forgiveness and pay them endless compliments. And I do it all in the name of therapy. If there's a feeling that my client needs to express or a situation that she needs to simulate, I'll do everything in my power to make it happen.

I also want to stress that I operate with only the highest and utmost level of therapist ethics. This means that no matter what you do or say in one of our sessions, there's no judgement. And this also means that our sessions are protected by complete doctor-patient confidentiality. What happens in our sessions is for your well-being and nothing else.

Finally, if you're still reading, you probably want to know how much something like this would cost you. And you might be surprised to hear that I offer Surrogate Revenge Therapy completely free of charge. If you decide to become my client, I will fly to where ever you wish to engage in our session(s) and get you back on your feet and feeling good without making your pocketbook one penny lighter. You see, I am the inheritor of a modest fortune and I have the means to live life on my own terms without worrying about money. Surrogate Revenge Therapy is my calling in life. In truth, I enjoy it. I like that I am able to let heartbroken women express their emotions in a safe, judgment free setting. I like that I am able to help them recover. And I'm happy to see them get over their bad break up and get on with their lives. Ultimately, that feeling of helping someone get back to living her best life is what I consider my payment.

So thank you, Jess, for reading my message. Whatever you decide to do, I wish you a speedy recovery and hope you go on to lead a great life and fulfill your dreams. If still have any questions or if you wish to begin therapy with me, don't hesitate to reply. And if I don't hear back from you, then know that I wish you nothing but the best.

Sincerely,
Dan Chase