[kamita721]

For my load, I ended up settling on a carton of water bottles weighing about 25 pounds. I placed it in my laundry basket, which had convenient handles at around ball crawling height I could tie to. Unfourtuantly, this made for a rather large load, so I didn't have many options for a route I could do without risk of getting stuck. My only option was a straight line from my bedroom wall to front door; about 30 feet. I was to start with the basket touching the wall, touch my nose to the door, then turn around and touch my nose to the starting wall, for a total distance of about 60 feet.

Unfourtuantly for me, I did my initial tieing in my usual floor play spot, about 10 feet away from the starting line. Since I hadn't started yet, I considered using my hands to help move into position, but in the end decided to consider it a practice run, so I would have the option of chickening out before starting if it was too much. Of course, I still needed to use my hands for the final foot or so in order to push the load all the way up to the starting wall.

The first leg (30' to the door) was uneventful; I went at a slow but steady face with a totally manageable tug on my unit. I did discover that "crawling" was not a particuarly effective method. Instead, I would move my arms and legs forward, then pull my butt, balls, and load; so really the pull on my balls was on and off. I knew from past experience, however, that you don't actually want to fully "rest" and release tension in this kind of situation, so even on the off beat, where my balls stayed stationary, I kept a solid tension on the rope.

The problems started when I reached the door and had to turn around. Right before the door was a section of tiling (unlike the rest of my route which was carpeted). It was small enough that the load didn't leave the carpet, but crawling on tile is not as comfy as crawling on carpet.

The real problem, however, was turning around. As I mentioned at the beginning, my only option for a route was a straight line, and that included not having room to make a proper turn around loop. Instead, I head to just turn myself around and retrace my steps. Initially, my concern was how the load itself would turn around. This turned out to be a non issue, when I started pulling, it just turned around without issue; and didn't even take that much force to do so.

The actual problem was once it was turned around, and I had to start properly pulling it. I had lost tension on my balls when I was turning around, which meant that when I started pulling again, my balls *hurt*. Every few pulls, my instincts would get the better of my, and I would let myself loose tension. Every time after loosing tension, it was a struggle to start the next pull. It wasn't even so much that it hurt (it did; but I am a masochist, and routinely inflict worse on myself for fun, although generally avoiding cbt), It was more the mental barrier to starting to pull and feeling the resistance on my balls.

By the last 10 feet or so, every pull ended up in me loosing tension, causing a very slow end to journey.