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Old 08-18-2011, 03:33 PM   #6
shynessincarnate
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Eastern Canada
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Komodo Jones View Post
Very nicely written. Hardly any gramattical or spelling errors. The only suggestion I may give to this story is don't afraid to give maybe a little more details. Details can be a writer's best friend. Also you may want to slow down the pace just a little bit. It seemed a little rushed in the truth or dare section. As for my decision of what Kristy should do I'm opting for the masturbation washroom dare.
Thanks for the feedback!

I'll see what I can do about giving more details. I never know how much is too much but I'll keep your suggestion in mind for the continuation of the story. I know it was quite fast paced, but I have a general plot outline and had to get through the intro of the story.

I'm happy I'm giving myself a week between each part, that way, I'll be able to take more time to proofread and maybe get rid of a few errors (don't worry, I took no offense, I'm happy you brought it up!).
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