I agree with everything said so far, communication is the most important aspect. What I would add is this. It sounds like you are both very new at this and both of you have little to no experience in this. In my years of being in bdsm, I have found that the best Dom/Domme have had some experience as a sub so that they understand the other side. I recommend that since you both have a sub side that at first you try some switching up. In other words show her what you would like by being a top for her in small scenes. Then switch it around and let her do those things as a Domme to you. It will give her the experience of what you will go through, you the experience of what she will go through and open some communication lines for the both of you. After each session regardless of who is in what position talk about it. What you each liked/disliked. What you would like to push farther and what was too much. Set safe words and use them if needed. I would also recommend as I have done with many others that you both knowingly to each other find a mentor to talk to about your respective roles. This is a good place to find those people. Feel free to talk about things with them. By a mentor I mean find someone that is not going to be a Dom/Domme to either of you, but someone that has been there or is currently there and is willing to be both a friend and a guide.
|