Hi Allison,
sounds like you are on a good track. I am happy you recognized the gap between your true gender identity and your body at that age, despite the unawareness of most people. I have seen a lot of individuals who find out rather late in their life, carrying around this deep source of trouble with themselves, and also the transition then becomes more difficult. But even they become much more happy and themselves by it. I also highly appreciate that you fight it through against the resistance you have described. I had a two lesbian collegues in school, and the mother of one of them threatened to kill them both. Sometimes the world and its people seem really aweful. I wish you all the safety and independence you need, and maybe, just maybe, that your family adjusts to how the world is and what you truely are, and love you unconditionally.
Anyway, what social attributes, likes and hobby could you identify, that fit the female label for a significant number of people, that you don't fit? Are there any male benefits you want to keep as a woman, for example self-confidence, the drive to fix problems, a certain stubborness towards other peoples opinions on oneself, or a certain carelessness?
If a fairy would grant you to change one body part immediately for you, which one would you pick? Which reminders of your male body annoy you the most or hinder your passing as a woman? Are there body parts you currently don't like to touch or feel? Are there any physical procedures or circumstances which you hate as reminder of your male body, like shaving or the male voice?
How would you people like to behave if they are unsure about your gender but urge to find out?
If a person is going to receive you as the woman you are, but misses to notice the current differences in your body or the later still being differences during your transition, and succeeds to engage with you consensually, possibly up to the point you desires each other, would you tell that person anything about your transition, and if yes when would you?
What's you favorite dream dress/complete outfit for a prom or another official party like a wedding (as a guest)?
Thanks in advance
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