Limits
 

This isn't really a "truth", but more of a request to start a discussion. I've been wanting to post this for a while, but just never got around to it.

This post is inspired by two dares that appeared here a while ago. The first was a face sitting game. Basically, two people take turns sitting on each others' faces with limits to what they can do for a certain amount of time, with the objective to get the other person to quit. After a while, you can increase the severity of what you are allowed to do, eventually being allowed to shit on the other person's face. There were several people that responded that they wanted very much to participate, including some that had scat play was one of their hard limits. I found it odd that someone would list that as a hard limit, then jump at the chance to play this particular game.

The second one was basically condom russian roulette. You get a six pack of condoms, poke a hole in one, then mix them up an use them in a variety of specific sex acts. This post got a warning from a mod about posting dangerous activities, but did not get deleted.

I understand that there are different levels of limits and different circumstances might change your limits. My limits with a stranger are going to be pretty vanilla, whereas my limits with "the one" might be more extreme. Full scat play is on my hard limits, but if I found the love of my life, she might be able to talk me into it with her. Also, no matter what you say, I am not going to do something I don't want, or think is a bad idea. I am not going to go try to get a one night stand pregnant, nor a girlfriend, unless we decide we are ready. Risky pregnancy play is one of my fantasies, but it is one of those fantasies that are going to stay as a fantasy.

So basically, I was hoping to hear your opinions on why some people list hard limits, then seem eager to break them, and why some people are so willing to take extreme chances at life changing experiences.

Moved this to kink and education.

It's a good question, but I'll respond later when I have more time.

I think the majority of what happens on getdare is purely fantasy. For the things that you described, I would be surprised if they were actually being done irl.

So basically, I was hoping to hear your opinions on why some people list hard limits, then seem eager to break them, and why some people are so willing to take extreme chances at life changing experiences.


So to answer the first part, I don't get it either. A limit should be a limit. You should be able to discuss why it is a limit with the dom, but in most cases, it should remain a limit.

Not having any limits is unrealistic. So is breaking something that really is a limit.

People should be honest about they can and cannot do. I agree that in a lot of cases, it is more for fantasy than reality.

Hope this makes some sense.

I have hard limits that I won't break for randoms but for my domme who I trust, I probably would. I know they wouldn't take me past what is safe.

I have my opinion on some forum sections (my rule of thumb). Here are several of them.

- Person Above section:
Most posts are to sexually stimulate yourself (the poster) and to fantasize about them. Most posts are either fiction or will simply not be done in reality.

- Request TorD Online:
Some posts (dare requests) are real and honest. Some posts are to sexually stimulate the poster and to fantasize about them. A select few are simply dishonest (lies/ fake).

- Messengers:
Most posts (if not all) are posted without thought and are cross-posts or duplicates.

So my answer:
They simply want to convince themselves that they will do the dare when in reality, they just like to fantasize and convince themselves. Afterward, they orgasm and don't look back at what they promised to do. Of course, there are exceptions. But it's incredibly hard to find them if there's no feedback on the dare. These exceptions often present themselves as thoughtful posts.

Other reasons:
- The user forgot to update the signature.
- The user changed and is motivated enough to break a (hard) limit.
- The likes, dislikes and limits in the signatures are aimed at the anonymous users on getDare. To these strangers, those preferences apply. If the post specifies that the user will do something with someone the poster knows intimately, the likes, dislikes and limits will differ from the ones listed in the signature.

I usually do my person above dares unless I can't for whatever reason. Since there's less reporting and such I don't want to bother people if something is a problem, but I try to do it.