Fighting for a Dom
 

I've had rl D/s relationships before as well as played a lot virtually. Now I've met someone new online who wants me to fight another woman irl for the right to be with him. We would both be meeting him for the first time and would have to go through various contests in order to be the one he chooses. He tells me this is one of his kinks and a big turn on for him.

The problem is that I'm non- confrontational, and thinks he should choose either me or her. If he later wants me to engage in contests with someone else as his, I would view that differently.

Am I being too close minded about this? I really like him and we have a lot in common, but should I be expected to change my nature to make him happy?

There are times that it is good to push your comfort zones and try new things, but you should NEVER be pushed to do something you are totally against. We all have to be true to ourselves above all

I'm not going to kink shame here. With the right bottoms and some clear negotiation and expectation setting, I can see this being a fine arrangement. However, I would personally never participate in this as written.

BDSM is a lot about things that might be hard for you, so that's ok to do if you want to, but it's not about being expected to do them, it's about choosing to. It's only up to you how much you wanna do and how much you wanna struggle to please someone.

Thank you all for the good advise. Sometimes you just need to hear things from others in the lifestyle.

While I have decided that I'm willing to meet him, I'm not willing to fight. If he wants to be with me he will and if he really needs this fighting contest, he can find someone else to be with.