sexist?
 

people on here I really want to know how many consider themselves as sexist?

Is it sexist just doing out primal roles in life, if yes then I’m very sexist you could say

Depends on the context.

At work I try not to be and think that I succeed.

Sure I make sexists remarks, but only if I know that the other people are similar minded or at least won't be offended. But if there are people around that I do not know well yet, I am cautious. And as to the sexists remarks, women are free to join and some do.

But in general I try to value people on their capabilities, even though unconscious biases can make this is very hard. I know of a woman who works relative short at the same place as I do of who I'm pretty convinced she is smarter than I am. You could say that because I view her like that, I am not sexists, yet this still might not be sufficient. Just like me she has a physics background and reads the same (geek) stuff. The trick question would be if I would make similar assumptions if I would talk to a woman at work who is in her behavior a bit more feminine. I think I still judge the same, but I should do some serious soul searching to be more convinced about my claim.

Relationship wise I think it varies.

I do know that I like 'the role' of the person who is calm and provides protection, that somehow feels natural. In general that results into most of the times being on equal terms but not always completely equal. And in the bedroom this plays out a bit more. Still at times, sometimes everyone is on equal terms, but at other times she has a lot less to say about what is going to happen (which does absolutely not mean she receive any pleasure).

I am definitely a feminist. I was raised by feminist hippies and I’m a woman, and was a lesbian for most of my life so yeah. Feminist.

alot of people might consider me sexist, I view myself as traditional.

no
 

No I don't believe I am sexist I believe in equality although in some ways I am still old fashioned .

some very interesting replies here from both perspectives of this topic I find them all as fascinating. I myself believe that equality can never been achieved based on many aspects physically, mentally and the fact men are the ones who gave us a right to even ask for equality so they will always have it over us. I equally don't believe women should be equal it goes against DNA females in all species look for a man to provide for us and protect us.

I would love to hear more peoples opinions and anyone who is willing to say they are sexist I would love to hear from you what your individual reasons are if your willing to share. I will not judge anyone for their opinions

Prejudice - A preconceived preference or idea.

Discrimination - Treatment or consideration based on class or category rather than individual merit

Under these definitions, no, I am not sexist. I treat people as people, regardless of their sex or gender. Though I confess I might sometimes be a bit nicer towards trans people, but everyone feels drawn to others like them, right? :)

Just as a quick fact check, the males being the ones to provide and protect is not, in fact, present in all species. The most popular example being how female lions are the ones that hunt and even some groups of primates have an alpha female and an alpha male. Not to mention there's this thing called sexual cannibalism in most spiders and some insects, where the female eats the male. Though I guess you could say those poor spiders are technically providing lunch. ^^

Not that I take my social cues from other species, anyway. None of them figured out how to make the internet, so their social structures can't be all that. :)

We did make the internet which has had a devastating impact on not only us but our children so I don't think that's an achievement.

It was just an example of something humans have done. :) Replace it with your favourite human achievement if you don't like the internet: Cities, electricity, technology, whatever. Presumably you don't think that other species have a better social structure than us.

Actually I think socially speaking we as a human race have a very poor social networking system. Look at how many people cause violence and hatred between us. Look at how controlled we are and how we are told what to think and feel. Other animals have much more freedom and they can act on instinct where as we don't we all suppress our natural instincts

Ah, well, I obviously disagree with that, but we're getting off topic here, so I'll leave it at that. :) Thank you for the discussion.

Your welcome thank you too

off topic

In all fairness, we have a tremendous good social networking system. When I buy a cup of coffee, the basic materials like the coffee beans, the water and whatever the cup is made of, originates from sources unknown to me. I can even interact with a person I do not know, yet end up with my lovely cup of coffee.

Chimpanzees where are also highly adjustable get far, but if the group becomes too large and the chimpanzees have a hard time to know each other well enough, the group will break apart. The only other species that can function together in large groups are insects. But only if they are all practically family. But because how they work together is burned into their DNA, they have a hard time adopting to new situations.

It is true that as a species we originally were not build to work together on world scale. And this fact definitely causes the violence and hatred we see around us. But there is no other highly adaptable species on the earth that can work together in as large groups as we do.

Note: I do think we need to change the stories we believe in, cause else in a worst case scenario we might bring doom upon ourselves.

Back on topic

I always think that expecting that in a world without sexism you will see an equal amount of women on top as men, might be a prejudice (although probably a lesser one) than thinking that women are not suited to be at the top. As men and women are different (not wishing to focus on averages and statistical distributions right now) I do not think you should expect an equal division at the top.

First note to my statement:
All my statement says is not to expect and equal outcome. My statement does not imply that more men are suited at the top positions.

Second note to my statement:
How we order our society has a big impact on the outcome. For instance:

• Having a society where it is easier for both parent to work, can have a large impact on female participation.
• Focusing on expressing emotions through writing, heavily punish a physical outburst, only have female teachers, and not let kids run on the playground, will have a big negative influence on boys.

These are simple examples to show how rules and constructs that apply to all, still can have a large impact on specific genders. And are we certain that we have the best set of rules and constructs to build the best peaceful and productive society possible?

Some speculations:

This is highly speculative, but I assume that part of the difference is due to sex.

• First of all, the biggest secret of the mother, is the name of the father.
• And second, power and a good reputation can help a man to have sex (and procreate). This does not work the same for women. The amount of children a woman can have is limited and the child distribution is more even among women than among men. Just place 100 males and 100 females on an island. Should you return in one and a half year you see 100 babies without any twins among them, you just know that each single woman has one child. But are you convinced that every man has a child?

Thus to become attractive we man like to have the biggest... car / money pile / prizes / explosions / confidence / buildings / stories / etc

Anyway, this is a bit speculative from my part and perhaps slightly over the top. And I notice I have been typing the biggest post so far :P

Thank you for your very comprehensive response (I am a female and did notice your post is the biggest.. It's in my DNA) I do see your points and I think they are very well made.

All the ism's are very much a hot topic, coming from the UK I see this especially so...living in Poland not so much...

Different countries are clearly in different stages when it comes to social awareness, but which is the right state to be in? I have my opinions and some don't like them, some applaud them.

One thing I hate is positive discrimination for example...I'm always a believer in having the most qualified person for a job not a ticked box to balance things out...
There have been a lot of things said about men dominating boardrooms for example, I see quite why this is unfair...but I am not sure it is all societies fault, but more how personal differences between the sexes can put women at a disadvantage in this area (I'm generalising of course I know), for example, women are often paid less than men...but this can often be not because they are lesser valued in a company, but because men make more of a deal about promotions and pay rises (I am not one of these men I will add) and because they are more vocal about these things and naturally a bit more aggressive and competitive they tend to reach those top spots more commonly.
The company I work for is very equal, we have a lot of Female managers, a lot of diversity and campaigns about sexual acceptance, all of which I applaud...but sometimes leads to complaints...We have a campaign for example to help Women in the workplace, though there is no such equivalent campaign for men, given our company is so balanced in terms of gender roles, one could ask...is this fair?

One thing I have seen in the news recently is rather disturbing to me...and that is the idea that things such as sexism (whether directed to a man or woman) would actually become a criminal offence. Of course I hate prejudice and will never approve of these actions...but putting them into law I worry can be abused, whether by individuals or by the state itself and are what I think is a slippery slope.
In 1984 (My favourite novel) people are only allowed to think a certain way...or they are removed from society and 're-educated', when reading this a number of years ago it seemed very far-fetched to me but seeing what is happening I worry this will be (and in many ways already is) the way that the world will go.

On a related note, there are issues surrounding racism which have blurred the lines of how government and security services are changing the way that things are looked at, take for example the horrific cases of the child grooming gangs in the UK, police forces at times quite deliberately looked the other way due to the ethnicity of the perpetrators of these crimes...and concurrently looked down on the victims because of their gender and their inability to walk away from such incidents.

Another growing problem surrounds sexual assault, this is an absolutely horrific practice I will again add, but there are many cases now of people being falsely accused, having their reputations being destroyed, their careers lost, sometimes even losing their families in the process...yet the people who make the false claims are dealt with a lot less harshly than the sentence that the guilty would have received, this is a big debate of course...trying to summarise it in a paragraph nowhere near does it justice.

Living in Poland I feel that there are more of the old fashioned principles, particularly in the villages, the world I live in now allows you to make risque jokes without causing offence, allows you to speak freely (within reason) without being shouted down for your opinions, women are allowed to look glamorous without being judged for it, though of course men are expected to be more of the traditional hardy sort on average (gym membership is very high here!), I feel much happier here than I did in the UK, but I feel over time all societies will creep towards more PC virtues...which I am sad about for many reasons...although I see the good intentions behind them, people take them too far.

I love discussions of this nature and I apologise for my rather unstructured post!

I hope at least one of my points has actually been helpful to the discussion!

I do like your post here in the UK it has gone crazy men who are scared to flirt for risk of being accused of sexual harassment it has gone way to far. I as a woman enjoy being wolf whistled it's a flirtatious gesture that makes people feel good but now is becoming criminal rediculas. Women and men are genetically different so cannot be expected to be 100% equal. Most situations you can find examples of them. Yes allow the best person for a job get that job but keep it in prospective. I believe that most women would be disgusted if 100% equality was achieved. Equally you bring up a very good point sexism does work both ways which is ironically lost in the justice system. Anyone who faulsely accuses someone should be equally punished too.

Thank you for your comments