Blog post 21 - anonymity

So to the outside world, I am an introvert. I do not do the typical uni activities that one might suspect I should. I don’t drink alcohol, I don’t do drugs, I don’t do clubbing because I’m severely claustrophobic, I don’t date, I don’t go around getting with every person in sight and having sex with them. I do make my 9am lectures, I do work outside of lectures, I finish my seminar work and I put in the effort to work hard. I prefer a nice quiet night at home with my housemates playing board games (love a good game of monopoly or Harry potter trivia), completing uni work, and doing my hobbies such as performing arts. In fact I spend a lot of my free time not even at home, I spend it out on stage and in training studios.

When I first came to uni I did not know anything about sex, or BDSM or any of this sort of thing. I was completely innocent, unaware, and oblivious and prepared to stay that way. I had no want to or plans or inclination to learn about this sort of stuff. And honestly I still don’t fully know about it all, and I STILL don’t understand any sort of innuendo. In fact as we found out in one game of never have I ever I didn’t even know what masturbation was when I got to uni. Since then I have found out much more through this site, perhaps even too much. My friends keep trying to lecture me on sexual things but I cover my eyes and refuse to listen as I already know enough and it is just a cringy topic to hear about and I’m careful that I don’t slip up. So as a result they still believe that I am an innocent, young introverted adult who needs protecting from the big scary world. They are great friends and really look out for me. However because they think I am so innocent and sex-deprived they do not know about any of this and it means I have to hide behind that innocence and act on it so that they do not realise. I have to heighten aspects of my personality (I am shy, I am introvert, I am most of the above just more sex-aware) to make them believe that I am the person they believe.

In reality I am a sex slut. The whole of getdare keeps me occupied and I enjoy reading the stories and imagining me in the place of some of the characters. Usually in the place of the most helpless, innocent character because that is what the persona I put on for the outside world. I am a worthless pathetic slut who wishes to serve anyone and everyone with whatever they desire from me. I should be used however any one wishes whether that be as a sex slave, a cum dumpster, a maid, a pet, a cunt hole, a whore, whatever they wish. I am an obedient little slut who will do whatever is asked of her without question.

The internet is a fantastic place to keep up the refuge of this slut. It is easy to hide behind a fake personality as can be seen by the amount of *unusual* people on the internet stalking others and pretending to be celebrities or famous people for the attention. In my case the opposite is true. It is a place for me to come and be myself. Let all my worries and fears out and just be me. I do not have to worry about upholding the standards people set of me (or at least not on here). It is a safe place to talk about my experiments and my interests where people do not judge me. It is a haven for me. Somewhere I can just relax, be myself and enjoy it without fear of getting caught, upsetting anyone or even being bullied for my differences.

List of degrading names written on me: slut, whore, cunt, cumdumpster, fucktoy, meathole, pussy, bitch, cow, floozie.

Total word count not including degrading names: 666

Personal feeling when writing it: worried about revealing who I really am.