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Confusing Kinks

Posted 05-09-2019 at 08:42 PM by Butterfly

Sometimes kinks can be soooooo confusing. It is bad enough that we get turned on by things that most people would find weird at best, and repulsive at worst. Who the hell knows why we get turned on by being peed on? or wearing diapers? or feet?

There are a few specific things that really leave my mind confuzled!

Denial
So, Denial is in my limits. It makes me so incredibly miserable if it is implemented for a few days, that I can barely function as a human being. However, the thought of being denied, is something that turns me on sooooo much that it can make me edge very quickly. And if I ask if I can have an orgasm, and I am told no? Almost instant edge! Being told ahead of time that I am not allowed to cum, makes me wet, desperate, needy, achy, horny, insatiable .... gah! Just writing about it is making my clit tingle and throb.

Gags & Breathe Play
I am claustrophobic. Having something as simple as a hoodie around my neck makes me panic. Hiding under a blanket makes it hard to breathe. Having a hand cover my mouth makes me want to cry. So why then, does the thought of using a gag interest me. Why do I get off on watching porn where the woman is put under water, or is forced to wear a gas mask and her oxygen is limited.

Control
In my everyday life, I have major control issues. I do not like others taking over my job at work, or even doing things without my supervision in the kitchen. I would much rather do something myself, so that I know it is done the way I want it to be done. I am a planner, I like to be in charge. I want to know what is going on and control how things happen. If somebody tries to tell me what to do, I rebel hardcore! I am very likely to do the complete opposite just to spite you. But I crave giving up control. I want nothing more than (the right) somebody to take control away from me. Force me to do things that I might not otherwise do. I have even gone so far as to fantasize about TPE at times.

Fear Play
I hate being scared. Every year my mom would plan to go to a haunted corn maze and I would conveniently "be busy" each time. Scary movies make me hide. Haunted houses aren't even something I go near. And if you want to jump out at me, prepared to get beaten. BUT ... fuck me ... the idea of being tied up and forced to watch a scary movie, or being demanded to go through a haunted house, or to face my fears in some way, it is terribly hot!

Messy
I am a princess. Being sticky and dirty is not something that I enjoy AT ALL. When I eat waffles, I have to be very careful so that it doesn't get on the other end of the fork. I don't even like to scoop my own ice cream because I ALWAYS get sticky. I have always said that having maple syrup dumped on me would be one of the worst things that could happen ... but ... maybe it is the utter lack of control, but having somebody slather me with chocolate sauce, or pudding, or have a sexy food fight is .... yummy!!!

Ahhhh! Why do kinks have to be so confusing!

Is anybody else incredibly confused by their kinks?
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    SecretGhost's Avatar
    Well.. to be honest yeah.

    My scat fetish is basically so confusing, i really disgust myself at times too.

    Like im so wild and messy when im horny but meanwhile irl i hate filth

    It confuses me how i become a beast basically

    Its really weird but i guess its how it is
    Posted 05-09-2019 at 10:55 PM by SecretGhost SecretGhost is offline
  2. Old Comment
    darkblue's Avatar
    Yes, many people here feel the same, I am sure, and I also know, what you are talking about. In your words lies a pattern, at least for me: You learned to control the fears in your life, you tamed them and keep them in a cage, safely closed with the help of intelligence and knowledge. They cannot do you any harm now. But they are still tempting like predators, they bear the potential of dark sexuality, of hidden pleasures of unknown intensity, and a part of you knows this very well. At least your body knows it clearly, it reacts directly. I guess, there is no kind of "solution" possible. Either you keep the cage safely closed and live a clean life, or you try to open the cage from time to time and get involved with your fears. For me, the latter way would be the better one, but more dangerous, of course. I am in a learning phase about fears myself, for some years now, increasingly during the last months, and would not be able to get this far without the help of a deeply loving soul.
    Posted 05-10-2019 at 01:50 AM by darkblue darkblue is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Komodo Jones's Avatar
    This isn't a rare concern actually. I think if you ask everybody on this site about their kinks, there is at least one kink that they enjoy that they can't explain. Spankings is one of my favorite kinks yet it was something i dreaded growing up. yet I've spanked myself so much more severe than my dad ever did. The human mind is an interesting thing and each one is different. While some other kinks or even your own kinks may make no sense, that's ok. And sometimes you don't need to think with your brain but just listen to what your body tells you. Being turned on by things that make no sense does not make you wrong or a sexual deviant it just proves that you're a human.
    Posted 05-10-2019 at 05:38 AM by Komodo Jones Komodo Jones is offline
  4. Old Comment
    Consensus's Avatar
    Speaking purely as a sample of one, i feel you. Twould appear that your links are partly about being in control of your fears and things you have thought as out of your control. Even TPE, it would be a choice, ergo, your control to have none. It's taking charge of that darkness, which is exciting.

    For me, my kinks are all about making me make sense. Always an outsider, my kinks take differences i admire and sublimate them. Perhaps.

    A fun to read blog that has set me thinking. Thank you for the brain food, Miss!

    Connie
    Posted 05-10-2019 at 09:52 AM by Consensus Consensus is offline
 

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