Ageplayers, Littles, and Babies
Hey everyone, I’m writing this to talk in general terms the differences between ageplayers, littles, and babies. Just like in D/s and M/s, every person is different and what generally applies to the population may not apply to an individual. I can only talk from a littles point of view, however, seeing as I don’t have Caregiver experience. (The name given to a Daddy Dom, Mommy Domme, or other type of caregiver). So, with that information in mind, the community as a whole prefers to be called “Caregiver/little” to encompass as many gender identities and relationship styles as possible. When talking about a specific relationship dynamic, it is acceptable to state just that dynamic. (e.g. DD/lg stands for Daddy Dom/little girl, and MD/lb stands for Mommy Domme/little boy). And there are many combinations of relationships that exist within the community.
Being an ageplayer, baby, or little is a state of regression in which the person in question simply acts younger than they are. In the case of ageplayers, it is a kink, and therefore a choice in where they regress to. A baby or little, however, is always personality based. Meaning, the personality of the person determines if they are a baby or a little. Just like your personality determines if you are a sub, slave, pet, Dom, or Master. There are, however, cases where the two or all three of these identities will merge and blend to create the whole person.
I’ll start with ageplayers, seeing as ageplayers are easier to start with. Being an ageplayer is different from being a baby or little because ageplayers dress like a baby and act like a baby specifically as a fetish. They have a specific age that they roleplay as, and can tell you what age that is upon asking. An ageplayer will use age appropriate toys and props. Rattles, diapers, bibs, you name it, they use it. Again, not every individual will be this way, but it’s generally true of the ageplayer population.
Littles and babies are harder to describe in general terms. They are quite similar, but the biggest difference is that babies are more dependent upon their Caregiver, and littles are more independent. For instance, a baby will want to be dressed by their Caregiver every day, and a little will want to dress them self. A baby will want to be fed just like a baby, and a little will want to feed them self, but maybe want their Caregiver to choose their food for them. Again, not everything applies to every baby or little as an individual.
Being a little or baby is unique from being a sub or slave. Littles and babies have several mindsets. They have their “little” or “baby” mindset, where they want to be taken care of by their Caregivers. Some have a “middle” mindset, which is a bit like a teenager mindset, and then there’s the “big” mindset, which is where a little describes them self to be when they need to take care of adult responsibilities like driving, paying bills, or taking care of family matters.
When a little or baby is in their younger mindset, they most often DO NOT have any interest in sex. I’ve talked to a few littles who describe it as, they know they have different or the same parts as their Caregiver, and the parts get “tingly” but they never have any interest in actually touching or playing. That comes when they’re in their adult mindset. Littles and babies find comfort in story time with their Caregivers, cuddling with them for no reason, playing with child like toys, being bathed by their Caregiver. The list goes on.
Unlike an ageplayer, a little or baby doesn’t exactly know what age they regress to. They may have narrowed it down to a limited range, but most often, all a little knows is that they are, well, little. If you ask a little what their age is, they might look confused as to what answer you want from them.
I don’t know much about the Caregiver perspective, but just from browsing a few things online, there are a lot of sources that say that littles and babies are very needy and clingy. They usually get jealous of other littles very easily, if they feel other littles are moving in on their Caregiver. To be a Caregiver, you have to be able to basically be a parent to your baby or little. If you don’t have the patience for a person who comes across as needy or clingy, then don’t become a Caregiver. Think about it, a little acts just the same way as a small child does. Mentally, they understand what they’re doing, but since it is ingrained into our personalities, we act on our emotions. So, in order to be a Caregiver, you need to treat your little or baby just as if they actually were a child. And that even goes down to punishment. Corner time is quite an effective punishment for a little or baby, because they hate to be away from their Caregivers too long. Whatever you do, do not EVER ignore a little as a Caregiver. (No one should ignore a sub or slave either, but littles and babies tend to internalize that a lot more).
Now, there is a stereotype surrounding the Caregiver/little dynamic that says that littles and babies had a traumatic childhood or were abused or some other thing like that. And while that is true for some, (as its also true for some subs and slaves) it is mainly a lot of bunk. Many littles and babies just want to let their inner child out, and had perfectly healthy childhoods.
Just so I’m pretty clear : Being a baby or little is not a fetish or a kink, and it is offensive to say so. We don’t view it as roleplay. We view it as a relationship/mindset. Don’t lump babies, littles, and ageplayers together because they are separate.
-from A Littles Black book
*If there is any inaccurate information in this entry, please PM me and I will correct it. This entry is based mostly on my experience only, and things I have observed. YMMV
Being an ageplayer, baby, or little is a state of regression in which the person in question simply acts younger than they are. In the case of ageplayers, it is a kink, and therefore a choice in where they regress to. A baby or little, however, is always personality based. Meaning, the personality of the person determines if they are a baby or a little. Just like your personality determines if you are a sub, slave, pet, Dom, or Master. There are, however, cases where the two or all three of these identities will merge and blend to create the whole person.
I’ll start with ageplayers, seeing as ageplayers are easier to start with. Being an ageplayer is different from being a baby or little because ageplayers dress like a baby and act like a baby specifically as a fetish. They have a specific age that they roleplay as, and can tell you what age that is upon asking. An ageplayer will use age appropriate toys and props. Rattles, diapers, bibs, you name it, they use it. Again, not every individual will be this way, but it’s generally true of the ageplayer population.
Littles and babies are harder to describe in general terms. They are quite similar, but the biggest difference is that babies are more dependent upon their Caregiver, and littles are more independent. For instance, a baby will want to be dressed by their Caregiver every day, and a little will want to dress them self. A baby will want to be fed just like a baby, and a little will want to feed them self, but maybe want their Caregiver to choose their food for them. Again, not everything applies to every baby or little as an individual.
Being a little or baby is unique from being a sub or slave. Littles and babies have several mindsets. They have their “little” or “baby” mindset, where they want to be taken care of by their Caregivers. Some have a “middle” mindset, which is a bit like a teenager mindset, and then there’s the “big” mindset, which is where a little describes them self to be when they need to take care of adult responsibilities like driving, paying bills, or taking care of family matters.
When a little or baby is in their younger mindset, they most often DO NOT have any interest in sex. I’ve talked to a few littles who describe it as, they know they have different or the same parts as their Caregiver, and the parts get “tingly” but they never have any interest in actually touching or playing. That comes when they’re in their adult mindset. Littles and babies find comfort in story time with their Caregivers, cuddling with them for no reason, playing with child like toys, being bathed by their Caregiver. The list goes on.
Unlike an ageplayer, a little or baby doesn’t exactly know what age they regress to. They may have narrowed it down to a limited range, but most often, all a little knows is that they are, well, little. If you ask a little what their age is, they might look confused as to what answer you want from them.
I don’t know much about the Caregiver perspective, but just from browsing a few things online, there are a lot of sources that say that littles and babies are very needy and clingy. They usually get jealous of other littles very easily, if they feel other littles are moving in on their Caregiver. To be a Caregiver, you have to be able to basically be a parent to your baby or little. If you don’t have the patience for a person who comes across as needy or clingy, then don’t become a Caregiver. Think about it, a little acts just the same way as a small child does. Mentally, they understand what they’re doing, but since it is ingrained into our personalities, we act on our emotions. So, in order to be a Caregiver, you need to treat your little or baby just as if they actually were a child. And that even goes down to punishment. Corner time is quite an effective punishment for a little or baby, because they hate to be away from their Caregivers too long. Whatever you do, do not EVER ignore a little as a Caregiver. (No one should ignore a sub or slave either, but littles and babies tend to internalize that a lot more).
Now, there is a stereotype surrounding the Caregiver/little dynamic that says that littles and babies had a traumatic childhood or were abused or some other thing like that. And while that is true for some, (as its also true for some subs and slaves) it is mainly a lot of bunk. Many littles and babies just want to let their inner child out, and had perfectly healthy childhoods.
Just so I’m pretty clear : Being a baby or little is not a fetish or a kink, and it is offensive to say so. We don’t view it as roleplay. We view it as a relationship/mindset. Don’t lump babies, littles, and ageplayers together because they are separate.
Quote:
Recently there’s been a lot of talk in our TinyChats about what it means to be little versus what it means to be an ageplayer. I can’t speak for every little in the world and I definitely can’t speak for ageplayers because I’m not one, but I’ll do my best to explain what most of us littles feel the difference is.
Ageplay, as the name suggests, is roleplay. People are roleplaying different ages during sex and/or in their daily life. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Your kink is not my kink. Whatever floats your boat. All of that.
Being a little is different because we are not consciously playing a role. We aren’t pretending to be younger. It’s just a state of being that we fall into and during that time it’s honestly who we are. In fact, we often get offended when people say that we “do ageplay” because we aren’t playing anything. It’s not a game for us.
Of course there are some littles who are into ageplay. In the world of kink, things tend to overlap, it’s the nature of being deviant. And there’s nothing wrong with that either. As long as what you’re doing is SSC (safe, sane and consensual), you should do whatever makes you happy.
But it’s important to remember that being little and ageplaying are two distinctly different things, especially if you don’t want a little to scratch your eyes out. You know how feisty we can be
Ageplay, as the name suggests, is roleplay. People are roleplaying different ages during sex and/or in their daily life. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Your kink is not my kink. Whatever floats your boat. All of that.
Being a little is different because we are not consciously playing a role. We aren’t pretending to be younger. It’s just a state of being that we fall into and during that time it’s honestly who we are. In fact, we often get offended when people say that we “do ageplay” because we aren’t playing anything. It’s not a game for us.
Of course there are some littles who are into ageplay. In the world of kink, things tend to overlap, it’s the nature of being deviant. And there’s nothing wrong with that either. As long as what you’re doing is SSC (safe, sane and consensual), you should do whatever makes you happy.
But it’s important to remember that being little and ageplaying are two distinctly different things, especially if you don’t want a little to scratch your eyes out. You know how feisty we can be
*If there is any inaccurate information in this entry, please PM me and I will correct it. This entry is based mostly on my experience only, and things I have observed. YMMV
Total Comments 4
Comments
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Thank you for posting this; it is a fascinating article and I hope informative to others. It has been to me.
It's great that you mention the sexual/non-sexual persona, and the switch in mindsets. The first thing I do when approaching a little is to gently ask about these things. Part of me struggles with being so forward, but a lot of people wanting to explore themselves may not be aware of the terminology, or face confusion in describing it as they are just being themselves. I'd rather be clear and aware at the start then cause distress later on.Posted 10-31-2013 at 04:25 AM by StrawDog 
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Thank you StrawDog
I take it you are familiar with littles then?
I wrote this because I do get tired of answering the same questions over and over.Posted 10-31-2013 at 05:00 AM by MysticalMadness
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I have some experience, but there is always so much more to learn, and I appreciate reading your thoughts.
It's understandable that you feel that way, and I must confess that I will ask many, many questions to build as much understanding and sensitivity to the person as I can.
There are a lot of people who do not examine themselves, or because they feel something is obvious to them, that others should simply know. Hopefully your post will go some way to clear a few things, or raise awareness.Posted 10-31-2013 at 12:38 PM by StrawDog
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As with your other piece "More Info About Littles", I thank you for these informative posts!
NilesPosted 08-15-2015 at 11:20 PM by Nilesmare
